Welcome to my life...
Today sucked, my emotions caught up with me. The stress of having to deal with all of my make-up work piled on top of the emotion of Chris being gone, yeah that's a recipie for disaster, let me tell you. I cried today, nothing all that different there. It's been like that since he died... I'm just sitting here, listening to music, trying to clear my mind of the worst image possible... I was watching COPS with my dad, and they were showing a show where some guy got shot with a shotgun, and it gave me the worst sick feeling. Just the very thought of Chris taking his life with a shotgun. All the carnage that it is capable of. My heart is acheing right now. I don't know what much I can do... I want to be mad at him for doing this, for leaving all of us to pick up the pieces, but I just can't find it in me to be angry with him. I just know that if he could have seen the outcome, he would still be here today. He never wanted to hurt anyone. God Chris why, why, why. I miss you so much, you have no idea...
School just sucked a**, I hate drama, and it seemed to surround me today. I had my friends with me, so that made things better. Gib cheered me up when I cried today, and my friends Kelly and Andrew gave me lots of hugs, so things got better by the end of the day. I still have yet to talk to my baby Kyle, but once I do I know I will feel better...
..Byyyeee ♥..
Ms. Misfit Penguin · Wed Feb 22, 2006 @ 04:05am · 1 Comments |