First off, I'd love to say I no longer reside with my mother. I still have to tell her that and go back to the house to get more of my crap but.. I've decided I can't take living with her anymore.
I explained the whole Chris thing? Yea, I think I did. If not, oh well. In a nutshell, my mom hates my boyfriend, yadda yadda. She thinks he's a low life piece of s**t and hasn't given him the light of day to actually make a first impression. She jumps the gun and is quick to make assumptions. When I told Mysterin what had really happened, he laughed. "So, he did nothing, eh?" Exactly his words. The few people that know my mom will say the same thing.
Anyways, I'm now back with my grandma.
On Monday, my mom started her crap again about the whole Chris spiel. Before that, it was all rational chit chat about school, work and such. Then his name got tossed in the mix somehow. It's all just a loud blur. She started yelling at me then rose to screaming and the the tears came. I just stood at the bottom of my stairs, arms folded, stone faced and laughing hard on the inside. It's all become a joke. She hasn't caught onto why I left. After she stopped her little fit, I went outside, called my grandma, packed some of my s**t and walked right out. But before I did so "Why are you leaving?" My mom asks. I just shrugged and left. I was so numb from it all that day, I couldn't even cry. It was filled with laughter, in my eyes. When I walked into my grandma's house I shouted "I'm sick of this s**t!" and busted out laughing, due to the Mad Mad Mario refrence. See what I mean? I'm so numb.
I mean, I feel like crap as it is that almost 5 years ago, I fought to go live with my mom again. [Whole other story.] And look, I'm back where I started. I just love it so much more here. I have my space and I have no one that feels obligated to be all in my business. I was able to go out last night with Mysterin and not have my phone buzzing every hour with "Where are you?" or "Who are you with?" or "What time will you be home?" I just had to tell my grandma where I was going, she said "Okay, call me later when you get home." How difficult is it to give a person space? I undersand mom is going to be a mom and all but sheesh! I'm 18, I can handle myself for a few hours with some friends. Then on a different note, she's yelling at me "Go out and get a life! Do something!" Here I am, doing so, and she wants to throw a hissy over it and be up my a**. I just can't win, can I? And she calls me hypocritical..
I'm really kicking myself in the a** though. I could have went back to the house today to get more of my crap if I would've grabbed my keys. They go out shopping every Saturday so I could've done it earlier today. I really want my art stuff and PS2! I looked right at my keys as I walked out of my room too...
But, this week has been rather well. Went out clothes shopping today with the aunt and grandma. I needed some new jeans! I got a new pair of Adidas sandals too which made my day even better. Grandma and I are going out shopping again tomorrow for groceries.. Mean while, I'm gonna try and suck her into going into GameStop while we're at Tops since it's right next door. I'm scheming again. I need a new PSP, considering mine is busted and my mom refuses to replace it so I'm just gonna lay the guilt trip for just a little while until I can get my hands on another console. Sounds kind of dirty but hey, if she's willing!
Well, I think I've covered just about all of my rant.
Peace&Love
Sammy
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PandaRayy
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