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So, the assignment was to make a weird story using a bunch of prefixes, suffixes, latin roots, blah blah. So here we go. I underlined the key words about halfway through, but then the computer started spazzing sooo pretty much all the weird words that seem out of place are the words that are the junk i'm supposed to use. enjoy.

Blondie
Once upon a time there was a girl named Scarlett. Scarlett had rebellious blonde hair, ironically. It was styled in a very unorthodox fashion. She studied hairology, the study of hair. She went by a pseudo-name, and called herself Blondie. Blondie was the talk of her suburban neighborhood because of her dysfunctional views on the virtue of society and hairstyles. One day she decided to start a revolution. She grabbed her microscopic megaphone and went outside.
“Attention neighborhood!” She shouted into her megaphone, “You need to stop having your egotistical hairstyles! You know those wigs you’ve been throwing on the road? You need to stop rejecting them and get that junk off of the interstate! It’s an injustice to factory workers who make the idealistic seductive hairstyles of the future!”
The neighbors halted what they were doing and stared at her. One of them spoke up.
“We’re tired of you philanthropic people telling us to wear the hairstyles of a counter-culture revolution! You’re not credible at all!”
“Yeah, well that’s big talk coming from a dermatologist who knows nothing about skin OR vacuum cleaners!” yelled Blondie sassily.
“Hey, I resent that!” the neighbor said offendidly.
“Come to the illumination! You can see it even without binoculars! I’ll buy cars to transport your wigs,” Blondie said hopefully. “I introduce to you, our hair god, Lady Gaga!”
The audience gasped. “I’m a hair atheist!” one of them said defiantly, “you’re just a…a fame monster!” The neighbor said viciously.
“I want your wigs and your bad romance off of the streets.” Lady Gaga commanded.
“You hyperactive hair revolutionists!” the neighbor said.
“Look, I’m going to make this brief and simplified. Get your stuff out of the interstate.” Lady Gaga repeated. Then, out of nowhere the paparazzi popped out!
“Lady Gaga! We don’t believe in polytheism, you’re our only hair god!” The paparazzi said in unison as they flashed their cameras. Lady Gaga paused for a second, and then ran away with the paparazzi following behind her. Blondie just stood there and frowned.
“Rectify your hair!” The audience shouted.
“You take these wigs and shove them..in your anteroom…” Blondie stumbled over her words.
“What?! That doesn’t even make sense! Shows what you know! You’re just a stupid blonde!” The rude neighbor said.
“Psh, you can’t read my poker face!” Blondie shouted as she pulled off her wig and revealed her blazing red locks. The audience gasped, but her shocking reveal was interrupted by a police car screeching to a halt right in front of her. As an officer stepped out and dragged her into the car, she sang to the neighbors,
“Just dance! It’s gonna be ok! Do do do doo!” and that was the last anyone heard of Blondie/Scarlett. All that remained was her blonde wig in the middle of the interstate.