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If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win, FOREVER.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...TWICE.

Aliens DO exist, they just know not to invade a planet with Chuck Norris.

There are two types of people in the world. Those who suck, and Chuck Norris.


Chuck Norris can move at two speeds. Run, and KILL.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

Superman once watched an episode of Walker Texas Ranger. He then proceeded to cry himself to sleep.

When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he doesn't push up, he pushes the world down.

And now some of my own:

If you spell Chuck Norris wrong, then you have automatically divided by zero. You cannot read this because your head has exploded.

Bruce Lee didn't defeat Chuck Norris. It was only an illusion...

We don't use rocket fuel to send our astronauts into space. Chuck Norris just roundhouse kicks the rockets for us.

Earthquakes happen when Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee shake hands.

Chuck Norris actually did win the Ultimate Showdown. He just dressed up as Mr. Rodgers.

Amelia Earheart claimed she was better than Chuck Norris. She was never seen again.

Chemical X, the chemical used to make the Powerpuff Girls, is really Chuck Norris's sweat.

When you get an E-mail from Chuck Norris...wait, you're not important enough to get an e-mail from Chuck Norris.

Nice, eh? xd xd