why do I always get the blame on me?
why do I allways get punished?
why are the things that make me smile never around me when I need them the most...
I'm done, finished, clean, its all over..
I don't wanne cry anymore.. it hurts my eyes to badly.. I get more ugly then I allready am...
I just wanne bite my tongue and swallow it and choke to death...
I wanne die, I can't take this any more. hate is every where... love? love is not near me.. its so close, yet so far.
I just wanne end my pain..
not like anyone would care right?
who would care that esena is gone?
I can name 4 people, just 4 ******** people who would miss me.
I'm so done with life...
tonight... I promise myself.. tonight, it will happen.
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Esena's Diary
Just me, typing something now and then.
a story, a poem, a haiku, a reminder, how my day went, whatever I come up with..
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my bff Ninja Yusuke and me <3