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My Story: Love, Lust, Pain, and Fear
This is simply as that, my story, the story of my love, and what happens and what is hoped to happen. Please read the whole thing. :XD
I’m lost within the eye within the storm, the eye of the crushing tornado. The rage of one’s fury and wrath has been brought upon me. The dangerous glances stolen and words that are cut short bring forth the true pain within me. I cannot change her emotions towards me; no in fact I can but take them upon myself and engulf them upon my dreaded soul. ‘Hell hath no fury, like a woman’s scorn’ true to the day that I stand here living with the flying objects and the yelling. I stand and take it; I have to, for she is my love, the love that loves another. I cannot change her emotions towards me, in reality I’d rather have hate then the pain that I have been caused. I have been thy lost puppy and followed thee till the end of time, ‘tis only a small amount of time to take upon myself the dreaded pain I know that I shall feel when I attempt to find a home. My home was in her heart, but she broke me just as before, before there was an us. I lived for her, as do I still, I lust I love I need her to survive the turmoil and the pain that I sacrifice my life for. I’m just a soldier within the war of love, a nearly deadly wounded soldier. But I still stand and fight, for her for us for a future that I wish to look upon. I willingly place myself within the line of fire for her, a target at aim, a dead shot: my heart. For I have not felt such pain as this, the pain that she has brought upon me, the pain that she swore that would never be there. Yet I still yearn for her attention through friendship, through care, I’m still more than willing to walk by her side to save her from that same pain that I am going through now. Why? Why, you ask, ‘tis but love that I feel for her, the time that I have been with her, the memories that I cannot just push away, for I don’t want to do so.

Still I stand calmly, my face stoic as she cries and yells at me, the look of pure rage within her eyes. I am looking at her willing to let her cry within my arms, but she doesn’t see that, she doesn’t want to see that. It hurts more than the friendly steel that I can place upon my skin yet I will not, for her for her respect. At least I shall have that, a light respect that I get. I still wish to save her from the tears that are now flowing freely down her face as I step forward and catch her and keep her steady. I have her look at me and I wipe the tears from her face with a small smile upon my lips.

‘Why can’t you hate me?’ She whispers to me, I can see the love she still holds for me as I shake my head in a negative gesture.

‘Never, for I love you too much to ever hate you.’ I hug her close to my body and rock her and in attempt to save the tears from falling I sing lightly to the woman that I consider my princess. ‘Just to see you smile…I’d do anything that you asked me too…all that’s said and done it’s worth all that’s lost, just to see you smile.’
‘Please hate me’ She begs for the hatred in which I’m unable to produce for her I cannot hate nor fall apart for her. I stand steady as I continue to hold her and whisper silly things within her ear and rock her.

‘I’m sorry but you ask the impossible of me; I cannot hate you not now, not ever.’ I whisper and have her look me in the eyes by having my hand slide under her chin as I slowly lift it and smile at the gorgeous princess. ‘I love you with all my heart, and for you, I’d give my life to see you happy, and if that means it’s with another then I will willingly give you up and walk away, just know that I will always be there for you and I will always love you’ I lightly kiss her lips for the final time and hold her close to me and refuse to let go. A light tap on the door is heard and her mother wishes to find what’s wrong. I smile and stand from my position upon the floor and open the door to let her in. ‘I’m going to make your daughter happy and let her do as she pleases, just know that I love her with all of my heart and your family, is the first time I have ever felt like I had a true home, your help has left me with a debt that I will repay in things far greater than money.’ I smile lightly and look at the girl that’s now wiping her hears on her shirt and then back to her mother. ‘I love your daughter with all of my heart, and I know that you will say the same as the others have, I’m too young to know what love is, but I do indeed know what love is. It’s what I feel for your daughter.’ I look down at my soon to be ex-girlfriend and pull her up into my arms and look in her eyes. ‘I will win your heart back, for the girl has no right to steal you away from me’ I look back to her mother and smile, ‘I wish to marry your daughter and I’m more than going to prove that what I feel for your daughter is true. I want to show you that I do indeed love her with all my heart.’ I smile again and hug my girlfriend close and whisper a final ‘I love you’ into her ears as I prepare to walk away and work on getting her back. I move to leave and I am stopped not by her but her mother, she smiles at me kindly, and then back to her daughter.

‘I do know that you love my daughter and I give you full rights to do what you need to get her back from this other girl.’ She looks at me and hugs me I go to hug her and remember ‘no one armed hugs here’ and I hug her tightly and thank her for everything. She nods and lets me go and I walk out the door with my heart in a billion little pieces and my drug completely gone. I swing my backpack over my shoulder and wave at them making my long journey towards that happiness that I have sworn to bring to not only myself but her also.





TwistedAnomaly
Community Member
TwistedAnomaly
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  • [11/06/09 08:54am]

  • User Comments: [1] [add]
    Djnite
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Mon Jan 25, 2010 @ 03:16am
    Wow. that's an intense story. I hope you get her back. I'm just confused as why she wanted you to hate her. I know how it is to love someone so much you can't hate them no matter what you do. I'm sure everything will work out for you =)


    User Comments: [1] [add]
     
     
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