it's funny, i had over 70 friends, and then i cleared out my friendslist to only include my true friends -- no mules, no people i met once and never talked to again, no...yeah, you get the point. i have 8 friends now, and two have left gaia. four are friends from real life. one is myself. that leaves me one friend, and i have the feeling i'm not even really considered a friend of hers. we talk alot, but i never really feel actually... that warm fuzzy feeling you get talking to a friend. i mean, what's the point? even online, even at my favorite place in the world, i have no social skills. i can't even make friends in a place where looks and social standing don't matter. i can't figure it out. i know someone who falls in love too easily. s/he has a bunch of online friends; and she actually counts them friends. she cares for them. why can't i fall in love like that? why can't i fall in love at all? who am i? and i thought about it, i don't even know who i am. i don't have a personality. i'm bits and fragments of people i've met, people i admire. everything i can truly count as one of my own traits is nothing i'm proud of.
i'm a flake.
i'm a dork.
i'm a pushy b***h.
i'm annoying and most people hate me.
and my two fears, which i prefer to keep quiet.
why can't i be nice? why can't i be lovable? why can't i be cute? why can't i make friends? why can't i be someone??
just useless thoughts and bits of dandruff.
i'm a flake.
i'm a dork.
i'm a pushy b***h.
i'm annoying and most people hate me.
and my two fears, which i prefer to keep quiet.
why can't i be nice? why can't i be lovable? why can't i be cute? why can't i make friends? why can't i be someone??
just useless thoughts and bits of dandruff.
Community Member
I remember when you PMed me rather randomly
and I was kinda like
wtf o.o;;
because I'm like that.
But you turned out to be fabulously nice! :>
Perhaps you just need time
to like
discover yourself?
I know it took me a while.
o____x;;;
But it's a good feeling
once you do.
:]
You can always be someone
yourself
and people will either like you
or they won't
and it will be their loss
not yours.
:]!