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It's happened again. I'm 'Free', or so he says. This empty feeling I have inside isn't making my day any better. An old friend of mine died two weeks ago from cancer, I just found out today. Another friend of mine commited suicide via shotgun, I found that out yesterday. My friends from school in my old hometown have all picked up smoking, stealing, doing drugs, and having unprotected sex. I feel as if I'm standing in an empty room, black shadows trailing down the walls and hovering under my feet. My legs give out, and I fall backwards, knowing that there is no one there to catch me. They left today.

Over these last few months, I've distanced myself greatly, yet unintentionally from all of my friends, centering my focus only on him. I'm going back, trying to re-establish the bonds I've weakened over the summer.

I could ramble on for pages and pages, outlining my misery to you, but alas, you have better things to do.

However, I will tell you something that I feel rather awful about. I feel as if I was being a bit too invasive. Due to an unfortunate incident, his account was banned. I created him a new one, taking time from my day and creating a new one for him. I spent my own gold creating a reasonably expensive avatar for him, designing his profile and his signature.

Today I logged onto the account I made for him, and deleted all of his messages. The only one that he had was from me, saying that I loved him.


I couldn't let him read that.