I lay here laughing myself to sleep.
The happy moments lost amongst the dead.
That nightmare keeps returning.
She keeps on falling.
I keep seeing him.
His body.
Dead.
Gray.
Eyes partly open.
I ran my fingers over the hand that I'd held so tightly and nothing happened.
After I laugh myself to sleep under that hand do I die.
He chose me for some reason.
They tell me he didn't want an audience.
I helped him so much.
Then I think of her.
How she jumped.
How I could've caught her.
How I should have saved her.
I replay these days over and over in my sleep.
Tossing and turning with a false smile.
False hope.
Anguish replaced with a smile.
Tears taken over by laughter.
I need to be human.
My wall is crumbling.
Someone.
Catch me.
The happy moments lost amongst the dead.
That nightmare keeps returning.
She keeps on falling.
I keep seeing him.
His body.
Dead.
Gray.
Eyes partly open.
I ran my fingers over the hand that I'd held so tightly and nothing happened.
After I laugh myself to sleep under that hand do I die.
He chose me for some reason.
They tell me he didn't want an audience.
I helped him so much.
Then I think of her.
How she jumped.
How I could've caught her.
How I should have saved her.
I replay these days over and over in my sleep.
Tossing and turning with a false smile.
False hope.
Anguish replaced with a smile.
Tears taken over by laughter.
I need to be human.
My wall is crumbling.
Someone.
Catch me.
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