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For the longest time, we had a family pet.

She was gorgious. A yellow lab with a mix of irish setter. So she wasn't blond, she was almost red. A really rusty brown colour for her ears, and this deep yellow for the rest of her. She had the most expressive face any one has ever seen, and she was well behaved, I would even go as far as to say that she polite. Yeah, my dog was polite. And she was fat, but that's because we loved her.

Willow. I think we got her in April some time, when the pussywillow's were out. That's how we got her name of course.

It's been almost two yers since we had to put her down. She was at a ripe old age, about 14. We couldn't keep her anymore, for the last six months of her life, she had gone deaf, and was suffering from lung cancer.

The day we were bringing her to the vet to see what was wrong with her....it was a day I knew I'd never see her again.

And sure enough, it was the first day in 14 years that I had come home and she was not there to greet me. It was the only time I have seen my father cry.

We even tried to get another dog. But...he couldn't compare. And it was unfair of us to hate him because he wasn't our precious Willow.

I could probalby take up pages and pages of talking aobut this dog, but I think I'll get to the point of my entry.

I dream alot. And I usally have something worth noting eveytime I wake up. Anytihng with the dog in, I remeber.

And yet, i never interect with when I dream about her. She's always just there, in the background, A fleeting gift. Why was it that I started to fear the dark after she died?

I still wake up thinking she is alive. I still cry when I think about her. But the dreams make me think something else.

Can animals be your gaurdian angel?

Update: I just recenlty found out that Willow was also suffering from a brain tumor....man I thought the lung cnacer was bad, but apparently it was the tumor that was killing her.