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Warning: May contain extremely crude and unfunny humor.
The Too-Well-Done Essay
Once upon a time, in a faraway land called Simsbury High, there lived a girl named Saru. She was reasonably intelligent compared to the sub-humans that attended her school, but compared to everyone else, she was extremely stupid.

Now, it so happened that Saru was a musician. A dedicated, but lazy musician. One day, her teacher came up to her and said, Saru, in that irritating way that warns, 'you're in for it'. Last year, you didn't go to any of the concerts. And you just missed another! That's eight concerts you've missed out of the eight you could have been at during your WHOLE HIGH SCHOOL CAREER.

High school is a career? It pays kinda sucky, thought Saru. But her teacher assigned her a ten-page essay on the advances jazz made from classical music, due in two weeks.

When Saru went home, however, she found herself with nothing to do. There was nothing on her television except static (she had no cable) and there was no homework so early in the school year. So, she decided, she'd do the pesky essay and hand it in two weeks early and earn some brownie points.

She sat at her computer, and, for the next three hours, researched jazz and classical music on Google, and wrote a simply mah-velous essay of fifteen pages that even she, as a decent writer, was proud of. The next day, when she handed it in, she beamed in the glare that her teacher gave her when the essay was given to her.

So, during her lunch period, Saru was extremely surprised that she was called down to the main office, who directed her to the dreaded...

Vice Principal's Office.


The evil witch of the Vice Principal's Office asked question after question about certain words and bits of advanced grammar, and finally, after nearly a half hour of interrogation, Saru had proven that she did indeed write the essay and was not simply a horrible plagarist. Defeated, the evil witch glared at Saru until she was out of sight, and, who knows, maybe after.

And that, children, is why you should always write like you are stupid, so that people don't think you're copying off someone else because you couldn't possibly be smart enough to know what 'expunge' means.






User Comments: [5] [add]
MissUtero
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Thu Sep 29, 2005 @ 02:23am
yeah she was an evil witch, yeah its good to write stupid stuff. but i always write really advanced s**t in mr hogans so he'll be impressed that i'm only in level 3 and maybe...just maybe he'll stop saying "do you get what i'm saying?" lol


commentCommented on: Thu Oct 06, 2005 @ 10:41pm
Lol! But it's cute... heart



P-Cubed
Community Member
Sayla Aris
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sun Oct 09, 2005 @ 01:18am
Lucky. I try to get asked if its plagurized, but I never do. Proabaly cuz I still can't spell...


commentCommented on: Sun Oct 09, 2005 @ 01:34am
Lol! Hmmm... It doesn't matter because I'm still a horrible writer...



P-Cubed
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Lufui Sakito
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sun Sep 10, 2006 @ 04:52am
THAT...is kinda funny
I'M the sketchy one with freaking messed up computer skills who actulay handed in a theses paper in the junior year with mental-bitchy, and got an A...and the paper was written by a program (made bey me)...how the hell did i not get called for plagerism...i hate her, never did anything, and here i am, handing in a paper with sources and everything...and it only used about 5 different sentense builds...but was perfect...TOO peofect to not be recognized as not created by human hands...DAMN, thee people are morons...oh well, i'm trying to go straight in college...it's hard after a life of cheating...pooie


User Comments: [5] [add]
 
 
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