Interviewer, around the studio, he's known as Humphery: So, I hear that you're attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, how does that make you feel?
Draco: It's only 23 hours, 16 minutes, and 27.... no... 25 seconds untill all these mud bloods, and kid wizards board the train to Hogwarts, they think that because they have a magic waving stick in their hand that they're all of the sudden.... Daniel Radcliff! UGH! *girlish squeal* But they don't know that I.... Draco Malfoy, will dominate this puny school, and recalin my fathers name as "total psycho with a hideous mullet" then they'll see...... Oh they'll all see!
Humphrey:.... Very good.... Um... What do you expect to happen during the next 4 years at Hogwarts? Any new friends? Enemies?
Draco: Oh, I suppose.... but they'll have to be big enough losers that they'll come to me! It'd be so frickin hilarious, if 2 wimps with buzz cuts and over sized jackets would be named..... Crab... and.... Goyle. That would really make the year more.... fun! *gives Humphrey the cat purr*
Humphrey: Freak! Any enemies?
Draco: oh..... my... Lord. Does that even need to be asked? OF COURSE! I've already had a plan to put some kind of squealing plant inside the professor's crap can, so there will probably be someone who's gonna *uses girly voice* freak out, because oh my god, the professor has a screaming root clinging on this a**. But yes, there will definatly be an enemy.
Humphrey: Well then.... It's been great working with you.... you little piece of....
Draco: What was that?
Humphre: Nothing. Well, have a kick butt time at the school of.... what's it called?
Draco: Oh my lord, this is pathetic. Forget it, I'm leaving, you'll be getting a "rub it in your face" card, signed from Donaly Trump, telling you that HE understands what trouble I'm dealing with, this is an exhausting thing, and you're.... just.... oh pitty, never mind. *struts his stuff off*
Humphrey: You go girl!
Draco: I'm a boy! I have a nickname for my stuff, dont' you damn Americans know anything?
Humphrey: Ok then, Honey, if you're listening, you better fill out the application sending baby Clide and Fredrick to KinderBoot Camp, cuz i have a feeling...
Producer: HUMPHREY!!!!!
Humphrey: Oh......... Crap!
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The Draco Malfoy Chronicles.... preview
Draco Malfoy.... such a lonely.... hot... lonely little bitchy boy. He seems so misunderstood, why can't people just see that it's so hard being a rich little asshead like he see's himself.....
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