Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

I am horribly afraid. We just got a call from Richard. You remember how he just got married to his girlfriend, Laurie, in June? Well, against all the warnings that our family offered her, she is now one month pregnant. I have never felt so much pity for an unborn child. MY COUSIN IS GOING TO MAKE THAT BABY RETARDED. Just look at how stupid he made his dog. Now imagine him doing that to a human. Need more proof? When Richard called to tell us that Laurie was pregnant he also told us how she told him. Laurie got a card that said 'you're going to be a dad' in it and mailed it to him under the name Mrs. [insert their last name]. When he got the card Rich looked at the name on the return address and said, "Wait...it's from my mom? WHY DID YOU TELL MY MOM AND NOT ME?!?!" Not only did that idiot forget that Laurie changed her last name, he forgot that HE HAS A DIFFERENT LAST NAME THAN HIS MOTHER.

That poor kid is SCREWED.