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I cant know myself without finding myself.
MY STORY~RICH GIRL~
Rich Girl


Chapter 1
A
Crumpled leaf floats down into the window of a shattered car. The rust covers it like a virus and slowly devours it. The leaf lands on the cracked leather and sits as if it were waiting for someone. The inside of the car is warm with morning sun shine and moist with dew. Jagged spikes of glass, still stuck to the window frames, glisten like ice against the brightness of the day. Black smoke rises from a factory off in the distance. Seagulls drop low in search of food. The springs squeak as a small child rises from the back seat of the broken car. Her small pale face is wet with tears and dirty. She stands and lets the rag of a blanket fall as she steps out of the car. Her sickly figure is silhouetted in the sun. The tip of her nose is sun burnt and her cheeks as well. It seemed as though her stomach was caved in, it growled with lust for food and hurt her every time. The hair on her head was in tangles and some if it fell to the ground as she slumped to a puddle of water. A big dirty t-shirt hangs off her shoulders and covers her scabby knees. A small scrap of cloth acts as a pair of shorts. Her feet are bare and very muddy. The wind is cold and makes her shiver. The sun had gone and the water she had just drunk had made her sick. She dropped to her knees and clutched what was left of her stomach. She gagged and finally threw up then wiped the dry slime from her mouth and arms. She looked down at the muddy puddle with throw up in it then covered her mouth. She crawled to a bush then curled up into a ball. Her sobbing was quiet and her throat ached. As her body shook, a rock flew and missed her then a second rock hit her on the leg as she cried out, but she still was quiet. Her leg throbbed and bled. “Over there!” snapped a young boys voice. A rugged looking boy smirked then kicked dirt at the poor girl. “She aint nothing like the last time we spied her” two other boys crept up behind him. One had a smirk like the first boy and the third wore a frown and was empathetic. “Maybe we should stop this guy’s”, the two boys made the smaller boy flinch as they turned around.

“That’s what I thought”, the nasty boy scowled then turned back around to face the young creature. He laughed then poked her with a stick “You still living girl?” The stick was sharp and hurt her but she did not make a sound nor did she move from were she already lay. The boy furrowed his brow then kicked her sharp in the ribs. “Ah!” the girl shot up and clutched her side wile tears rolled down her pale skinny cheeks. “So you are!” the boy had pleasure in his eyes as the second boy lunged forward and grabbed the girl. She screamed hoarsely then went limp in fright of the first boy that had approached her. “Stupid garbage girl.” The tears from the girl’s eyes reflected the empathetic boy. He stood in his place and watched helplessly as the two boys tortured the small girl with dirt, sharp objects, and free crawling bugs. “Hungry?” the mean boys stuffed dirt into her mouth and up her nose. She sputtered and gasped as her oxygen was cut off. The girl’s eyes rolled to the back of her head as she struggled to get air. They were giving each other looks of distress then dropped her and ran. “Come on Dylan, we’ll get in to trouble.” Dylan looked panic stricken as the girl passed out on the ground. He ran to her and scrapped the dirt from her mouth then her nose. He pounded her chest as the frail girl sputtered awake. She screamed and scuttled away from the boy, gripping the dirt and kicking at him panic stricken. “Hey, it’s ok” he reached out a hand as the girl’s chest pounded with fright. Dylan crawled over to the shivering girl and put his hand on her shoulder. Immediately she collapsed into his arms with desperate needs for love, care, and affection. Her frail body was cold against his warm soft figure. “There, there dove. It’s alright.” For a ten year old Dylan was very fatherly towards the girl. His words were like warm fire to her heart. He picked her up and carried her down a stone road. The girls eyes were almost milky and blue in the sun light, she stared into the sky and then at Dylan and smiled. Her boney face stretched as she smiled and revealed her small grey teeth. Dylan stepped into his house still carrying the girl and set her down on a soft green couch. “Mom!” the boy yelled as a woman walked out from the kitchen, carrying a glass of punch. She dropped her glass; she covered her mouth then hurried over to the girl. “What…?” she knelt down next to her then looked up at Dylan. “What happened to her, what is her name?” Dylan sighed, he knew if he told her what had happened then he would get beaten and then he would have no friends. “I found her over by the rust yard, she needs our help.” Dylan’s mother knew that he was lying but that she would deal with later. “Honey, honey can you hear me?” She touched the girls face and saw her blinding eyes. “Honey what’s your name? Do you have a name?” She lifted a frail hand to the woman’s hand and spoke in hushed tones “Nima…Ralph” Dylan’s mom stood up quickly and wiped a tear from her eye. “I’ll get her some food and something hot to drink. Dylan?”

He looked into his mother’s wet eyes and nodded. “You did the right thing.” She kissed his forehead and walked into the kitchen. He sighed looking at Nima then cleaned up the mess that his mom had made. He ringed out the soaked rag and hung it up to dry. Nima shivered even when Dylan had placed a blanket over her. He fed her warm soup and read small poems to her that he had written, but often times Nima had fallen asleep before she could hear his rhymes. One afternoon when Nima had been sleeping, Dylan watched her closely then wiped a tear from his eye. Nima had woken up as Dylan turned away, not wanting her to see his sadness. Nima had no record of family accept for an uncle in Bosnia, whom was believed to be dead. The orphanages were horrible and Nima had told Dylan about how she had escaped going there by hiding in the buddy river beds next to the rust yards. “Oh, how horrid, you must have gotten sick?” Nima looked into Dylan’s mothers eyes and nodded. “I’m very sick ma’am.” Nima’s skin was very pail and her eyes were almost ghostly and blurred with a milky substance. “Well then Nima, we’ll have to get you a doctor.” Dr.Glint soon arrived with a case of normal check up supplies and vaccines. Dylan’s mom helped prop Nima up as Dr.Glint checked all her vitals and very carefully injected her with the necessary fluids that would help her body recover.

The darkness in the sky was similar to the grey areas beneath her eyes. Nima was malnourished, had pneumonia, an infected leg, and was going blind. The doctor discussed this as Dylan’s mom spied him listening in the other room. Dylan ran back to Nima and hugged her tightly. They dressed her in a green sweater, pink socks, and a pair of small jeans that had once fit Dylan when he was younger. For about nine years, Dylan had been watching out for Nima. His previous friends had not since talked to him for taking in the girl. His haunting days at school stabbed him beneath his chest and slapped him across his face. In the school yard he stood alone and looked longingly for friends to acquire, his heart was nearly broken but kept together by the care of Nima. He did not understand this fully, it was the first actual friend of his youthful life. Dragging his feet and looking into the sun, he hid his face from the two bullies he used to call friends; he was blind until he saw what they had done to Nima. Before he knew it he was on the ground and grasping his cheek with his shaky hand. His melancholy eyes glistened with angry tears, he hears laughter and his heart burns like a humiliating fire.

“How’s your girl friend? Dylygirl!!” Sid from the junk yard stomped over and kicked dust into Dylan’s face. He moaned and propped himself up with his arm then stood up. “Get back down there!” Sid pushed him down as another stupid cackle was heard. “Where’s your baby girl Dylygirl!?” Dylan furrowed his brow and stared menacingly up at Mitch, his stupid little grin poked fun at Dylan’s heroic scene yesterday. “A couple of my chaps saw you carrying her home yesterday, did you kiss her? Is she dead? You know, I should do the same to you.” They circled slowly and kept Dylan on the ground, “Trader!” He kicked him in the leg and laughed as Dylan groaned in pain, “Leave me alone!” He sprang up and punched Mitch in the face. “Leave her alone!” Mitch pushed him off as Sid and his other thugs grabbed hold of Dylan’s writhing body. He screamed as they pummeled his stomach until he was spitting blood and knocked out. “Hey!!” A yard supervisor ran to the scene and made everyone of the boys scatter. Dylan lay limp on the hot blacktop, blood seeped from his mouth, the lady picked him up and carried him to the office. Her eyes shot towards the boys who had done the dirty job, each one of them would be severely punished.

At the office Dylan was cleaned and set to lie on the cold plastic cot in the corner of the nurse’s office. He shivered and curled up into a ball, he was scared and the only thing he thought about was Nima and if she was still alive. He pictured her shriveled up on the couch, quiet, frail, and maybe thinking about the one who had saved her. The blood on his shirt made him cringe; the cold stains were frozen against his skin. Flashes of the incident scared his dreams like the stains on his shirt. As he opened his eyes they were stung by the pang of tears. His cries were like that of Nima’s. His heart seemed to be filled with her; she seemed to be easy for him to care about even fall in love with. The quiet stillness of the room made him scared, being alone scared him, being himself in his own life scared him, and not knowing if Nima was ok scared him most of all. He knew she was helpless without him, if she died he would have nothing. Guilt flooded his self esteem; he was attached to Nima and felt like he was using her as a crutch to not feel bad about himself. He was a leech and should have been squashed by the bullies earlier that day. He was scum and he had only tapped into the consciousness of in which he was less than scum but every day seemed to reject his own reality. The only thing that made sense was Nima.

Time, like always, seemed to be passing by slowly at school but faster when he set his eyes upon Nima. He had seemed to grow and become his everything. He lived for what seemed to be only her. The only problem was that he did not yet fully understand the concept of love, he being a boy, was stupid and grew stupid like every other boy. Except for the fact that he was aware of himself but little he knew that he was smarter than he thought in everyway possible. The curse of the passing of time injected itself into Dylan. Puberty made his voice deeper, his heart warmer, and his caring for Nima stronger than ever. Hair grew all over, he was more socially awkward than ever and he was making plans for his future that were way too elaborate for him to handle. Nima was not as sick as before and had lost ninety percent of her eye sight by the time she could stand and move about the house with the help from Dylan. Every time he took hold of her hands and led her around the house he was intoxicated by her smell, her skin, and her quiet talk about what she learner, saw, or heard from the loud and colorful television that Dylan’s mother left on all day. Dylan noticed changes in Nima, her hair was long and wavy and her white eyes blended with her skin, even in the blazing sun. Every day when Dylan came home from work he helped Nima with her home schooling and talked with her about her future plans and interests. “I want to be a painter, and travel the world. With you, always with you.” Dylan smiled and patted her hand, “Were did you get that idea?” Nima looked down at her boney feet and shrugged, “I saw someone on the TV who did it and I was just thinking, that’s all.” Dylan nodded, “you are going to be famous.” He leaned in and kissed her forehead then continued with his lesson in arithmetic. Nima looked out the window and thought of were she had been before Dylan had saved her. Her throat ached wile she held back her tears. All the trouble in the world could not add up to her sorrow. Dylan looked up and saw her crisis then held out his hand, “Your going to be famous, now don’t be sad Nima.” She nodded then listened to Dylan’s math lectures.

“But Dylan, what are you going to do?” He frowned “I mean we are getting older and we are going to want to do something’s with our lives. Do you know what I mean Dylan?” He smiled as she slid her hands onto his, his warm red cheeks added to the heat of the day. “I do Nima. I’m goanna do whatever I can to make you happy and even if I’m not there to help you you’ll still have to know that I love you and wherever we are we will meet. Then on one day you’ll defy all odds and we will meet somehow when we are grey and old and we will live the rest of our lives together.” Dylan put his arms around her and felt Nima squeeze him back with a warm embrace. “I’m so glad you are in my life Dylan.” Dylan kissed her forehead “you are my life Nima.”

The sound of a glass breaking in the kitchen echoed through the white noise in the house. Dylan looked up and saw his mother lying limp on the cold floor of the kitchen. “Mom!” He sprang up and ran to her side, her eyes were panic stricken and still, her lips were still warm, and her body sprawled out as if she were dancing. She was beautiful, Dylan was crushed. “Dylan?” Nima’s quiet voice rang through his ears, “Yeah Nima?” He got up and turned, “Is she, dead?” Her pail hands moved over her mouth as she said the grave words. “Yeah Nima” he dropped down on his knees and stared sadly at his used to be youthful mother. Nima got up and ran to were she thought Dylan was and felt his back as he cried ever so hard for his mother. “Shhhhh, Dylan, you are my life. You are my life.” She put her hands around him and rocked him slowly, both on there knees. Outside a blue bird sang and welcomed the sunny days to come.

As soon as the police came to get her Dylan was silent, he rambled on about what happened but truthfully did not know how such a strong woman could die just like that. “We are sorry for your loss; will you be ok with taking care of your sister?” Dylan gave a blank stare and nodded without even listening. “I’ll leave you to your morning, I would advise you to drink lots of hot things and to eat sweets. Good day to you.” Dylan nodded again and shut the door, Nima sat on the couch with her hands in her lap, breathing slowly. “I’m sorry Dylan.” Dylan shook his head, “No Nima, there was nothing we could have done. And I’m taking care of you now; I’ve decided to drop out of school.” “No Dylan, you have to get a good education. It’s what your mother would have wa...” Dylan furrowed his brow “My mothers dead!” He instantly put on a shocked face “I’m…I’m so sorry Nima….I” He ran out of the room and into the bathroom then threw up.

Nima shook her head and buried her head in the couch “It’s all my fault….it’s all my fault….it’s all my fault.” She blamed herself for being such a burden to his mom and to Dylan. She slowly fell into a deep sleep and smiled as Dylan covered her with a warm blanket. “It’s ok Nima” He rubbed her back slowly then soon enough went off to bed, tears still constantly fell from his eyes time to time.




Chapter 2
The darkness of the room were Dylan slept crept over him like spiders in a small cave. His chest rose up and then sank down every five seconds he took in air. His hair fanned out like the branches of a tree, the window that was open pulled in cool air and masked his face like ice. His small boyish body was cradle in the blankets; quietness was like a sweet lullaby that cleaned out his head of all bad thoughts and worries he had about Nima. Cold sweat clung to him and made him shiver; he sat up quickly hearing foot steps by his door. “Dylan? Dylan are you awake?” Nima whispered. “Nima? Come to bed it’s freezing out.” Nima quietly and slowly made her way over to his bed and slipped in beside his warm body. “Go to sleep Nima, tomorrows going to be better...” Dylan fell asleep wile Nima listened to his soft breathing until she had fallen asleep herself.

Dylan and Nima’s bodies cradle each other like clay being held in the palm of a hand. His nose was buried down into her hair; Nima wore a smile as she slept so soundly. The morning brought them a new beginning, Dylan’s eyes cracked open and gazed up at the smiling Nima standing before him. Her eyes stared blankly into the sun “Nima, what are you doing?” She turned quickly “I saw color.” Dylan smiled “You did?” She nodded then jumped onto the bed and sat next to Dylan touching his face. “Your face is so warm.” She felt her own face “I’m so cold.” Dylan pulled her to him and snuggled her “Come here.” She giggled and smiled. “Dylan?” “Yes?” “What’s a rainbow?” Dylan laughed “It’s filled with colors and it’s in you, you’re my little rainbow.” Nima giggled “Then you’re my big sun.” Dylan got out of bed and pulled Nima out with him. “Come on lets get some breakfast.”

Times in the house passed by even slower, birthday’s came and went. Nima was 16 and Dylan was 18. The showers of confetti stained there memories wile cake stirred in there stomachs. They spent there free days in the parks with the most sun and green grass to roll around and day dream on. Deep in his mind Dylan worried about his future.
Dylan had planned on moving out to a better house out on the coast but was torn between what he really wanted and what he really cared about. Never in his life had he seen his father, truthfully he thought he was dead because no one would just discard there son like his father had. Through all the sorrow in there life’s Nima and Dylan were connected by there hearts.
On a morning of complete silence Nima had awaken and walked to the metal table for a cup of cold tea that had been sitting in the ice box. The old green sweater hung around her shoulders like a snake, loose and lanky as though it were dead. Nima felt around the kitchen for a glass and came upon Dylan; he was carrying what seemed to be a box. “Good morning Dylan.” Dylan said nothing and set the supposed box down on the counter. “Hi Nima, here.” He placed a glass in her hand and sat her down at the metal table. “I’ve got something for you.” The box he was had been carrying was set on the table wile Nima listened to what he had to say. Her hands moved around her glass in excitement. Dylan took something from the box and placed it in to her hand, “It’s a paint brush and, here.” He took paint tubes and a piece of parchment then set them on the table and took Nimas hands and placed them upon the treasures. “There, there mine?” Nima clutched her chest and breathed slowly.
“Are you ok Nima, do you need anything.” She shook her head as a stream of tears made there way down her face. “Its…it’s just that you’ve been so kind to me and I’m so thankful to have such a kind man as you to look after me.” Dylan beamed proudly and stood up taking Nima into the living room for her first painting. He set up the stand and placed the paper on the hold then squeezed the paint out onto a tablet and placed a brush into Nimas shaking hands. Nimas heart fluttered when Dylan lead her brush, his hand was soft and warm on hers and made her blush. Nima did not know it but Dylan lead her brush so that it produced a very vibrant red heart. He took her other hand and placed it on his chest. “Do you know what that is?” Nima smiled very widely, “It’s your heart.” She hugged him forgetting the paint on the brush which smeared all over Dylan’s shirt back. “Sorry, sorry. I’ll clean it up.” She turned and tripped over the canvas stand and was quickly saved by Dylan who hand caught her in mid fall. Dylan stood her up on her rickety feet. “So when are you leaving?” Dylan said nothing and stared at her sad white eyes. “How did you know?” Nima sighed, “You’re always unusually quiet around me, and I know you cry. I can hear a lot more than you think.” Still Dylan said nothing on account of he was in shock. “That’s ok, you can go. I know my way around the house and…” Dylan took Nima in his arms and kissed her.

The rush of his breath rang through her ears as they embraced. Nima felt numb with love and could only breathe for Dylan. Nima pulled away from him and sat down covering her mouth, she had become dizzy with all the romance. “You’re all I have now Nima and I want you to go with me to San Francisco. I just bought a house in the Victorian area and its just really great Nima. What do you so?” Nima couldn’t say anything, her breathing slowed down as she stood and felt Dylan’s face. “I’ll go.” They embraced once more and then they were off. Nima had nothing but the clothes on her back, the paint set, and Dylan. Dylan had been packing for a week and was successful in his sneakiness around Nima. Dylan sold the dreary old house to an old couple who had just come in from Russia by ship. There fast pace talking confused Dylan but he managed to settle things in the end. “What is San Francisco like?” “It’s like no other feeling in the world.”
The sun gleamed against Nimas cheeks as her curly hair bobbed in the wind of the speedy car. “It’s nice; there are a lot of art galleries there, and good food and its hot most of the time.” Nima sighed and fell asleep to the sound of Dylan’s voice. She dreamed of actually seeing the ocean and the sand and the roughness of the rocks as the water splashed against them. The small car clamored up a cliff side road and rocked with every inch they went. Dylan came to a small shop on the shore of the Bay and sat thinking about the life that they would have. Nima gave a cough and opened her eyes feeling the majestic sun on her face, “We here Dylan?” He nodded, “Yah Nima we are here. We are here.” Dylan quickly got out and opened the door for her. Her pale almost yellowish legs poked out from beneath her shorts and felt nice in the cool breeze of summer. As she stretched, her green sweater revealed a flat stomach. Nima looked as though she was 20 when she was only 16 years of age.
It did not matter how old Dylan was, that could not separate the bonds of affection between them. Dylan walked up and down the beach wile Nima leaned against his shoulder and told him what she thought the beach looked like. Behind her blind eyes she knew the beach was beautiful and full of life. They sat on the sand and held each other, Dylan drew hearts in the sand wile Nima spread her hands over the sand and felt the smoothness. “Do you want to go to the house?” Nima gasped “The house?!” Dylan pulled her to the car and drove off to the neighborhood were they would be living.

Dylan looked for there new house wile he told her of a surprise he had in store for her. “Your going to love it Nima, it will be like nothing you’ve ever experienced before.” They pulled up to a yellow two story with a metal gate with white rose bushes around the stone walkway leading up to a big shiny white door. “Is it beautiful?” Dylan looked at Nima and beamed so proudly. “So beautiful” he said wile admiring not the house but Nima’s beautiful face. “Well then let’s go in.” Dylan led her into the house after she had smelt the roses. The wooden floor creaked beneath there feet as Dylan sent Nima off on her own to familiarize the whole house. The whole time she creped cautiously around Dylan watched her from a large leather chair across the room. Her thin fingers felt the walls as her ghostly eyes stared off into no were. “Do you like it so far?” Nima jumped and put a hand on her chest, “You scared me. I didn’t know you were there, were am I?” Dylan chuckled “Your in the bathroom, it’s nice to. It’s got a lion footed bathtub.” Nima moved her fingers along the smooth surface of the tub, “What else is there?” Dylan looked around and saw stain glass windows, flowered wall paper and a smoky glass mirror. “Hey Nima?” Nima looked up and smiled “Yes?” “Do you consider us, well...Uh?” “What?” “Am I your boyfriend?” Nima chuckled “Of course you are silly, remember you’re my big sun and I’m your little rainbow.” Dylan took Nima in his arms, “Good, I was just making sure.” Nima smiled “Don’t worry, you wont be going any were.” Dylan smiled, “So how do you like the place?”

“Its great, are you ok? You seem a little, well, disconnected.” Dylan chuckled, “You’re so interesting to watch, I’m just hungry that’s all. Would you like to have Dim Sum?” Nima looked puzzled,” Dim what?” He laughed and held her all the way out to the car, Nima pushed away from him, “I can do it myself.” Dylan took her arm again. “No! I can do it Dylan, I have to learn.” He nodded and watched as she slipped on the steps but soon after found the car and sat herself down next to Dylan. “See I told you I could do it.” Dylan nodded, “You can do anything Nima, that’s why I love you.” He bent over and kissed her cheek. As Dylan drove Nimas cheeks never stopped glowing red as beets and cherries. At there table Nima ate very little wile Dylan told her what she was on the Chinese calendar. “I though I was a human, not a monkey.” They both laughed and left after Dylan had paid the bill. The evening was full of deep violet and pinkish orange brush strokes that the sun had made wile setting. They drove to the beach again and walked atop the cold sand wile whispering into each others ears.

Nima lead herself up the walk way and into the living room with Dylan close behind to catch her if she had fallen. “I haven’t seen the bedrooms yet, what are they like?” Dylan blushed, “There’s a small guest room and a big one, Ill sleep in the small one tonight.” Nima felt for Dylan and took his hand, he lead her into the bedroom and watched as she laid down and covered herself with the white spread that had been left from the previous owners. “Good night Dylan”, Nima said knowing that Dylan was still in the room. “Good night Nima, pleasant dreams.” He turned the light off and closed her door softly. He leaned against her door and slumped down thinking about what Nima was probably thinking. He did not dwell on this too long; he crawled into his little bed and turned out the light. The icy sweat on his chest jerked him from his sleep; he had heard a crash at his door. It was dark as his door opened; the umbrella stand had been knocked over. The outline of the figure was evident, Nima had wandered in and was grasping for a surface. “Nima”, Dylan whispered as she fumbled around in the dark. “I’m here Nima, over here.” He got up and led her to his bed. “What are you doing Nima, your suppose to be asleep. Nima?” She hugged him and lay down next to him without saying anything. “Good night Dylan.” “You know, you should have just slept with me, I would have let you, you know that.” “Yeah, it’s just more exiting walking around in the dark looking for you.”

They slept warm and cozy all night until the light of the day filtered in through the blue stain glass window. “Nima?” Her warm body pressed against him was comforting and made him feel secure. “Dylan.” She felt his face and propped herself up with her skinny arms. “Morning rainbow, get ready for your surprise, its going to be great.” Nima showered and pulled on the same old green sweater and gene shorts that matched with her lime green flip flops. They drove to the same beach as the day before. Dylan rented a sale boat and told Nima nothing of what was going on. Once they got out to sea Dylan took her hand and placed it in the water. Nima gasped “It’s so very cold isn’t it?”

“Guess were we are.” Nimas whole body shook with delight and coldness. The clouds over head swirled with grey sadness. “I’m in a boat Dylan, I’m in a boat, I’m in a boat. A boat, a boat. Dylan.” She touched her lips as they quivered and tasted the salty water from the sea. “It tastes bad.” Dylan laughed and pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her. “How long had you been planning this?” Dylan kissed her neck, “Oh, about a week before I gave you those paints.” The gentle rocking of the boat carried them off to sleep.

Little drops of rain fell from the sky as the surf started to rock the boat. Dylan jerked awake and looked to the shore and saw that they were farther out than he had remembered. He quickly tried to get back to the shore but the wind and the current was too strong. “Dylan what’s going on?” Nima held tight to the side of the boat with tired scared eyes. “Don’t worry every thing is fine, it’s just a little rough that’s all.” Nima detected nervousness in his voice but said nothing. By then the boat shook dangerously. The wind was fierce and the water splashed onto the boat, soaking Nima as she screamed. With one final wave Nima was gone. Dylan looked back from the paddles and gasped. “Nima!” he yelled but heard nothing but the wind. Her body, hidden by the water, was carried off with the current as she thrashed about fighting for her life. Dylan sat in utter silence, knowing that he would never see her again. He fell to his knees gasping for air wile he had a panic attack a bright light shined in his face. He fainted and a man jumped aboard and walked over to him.
Dylan awoke on a stiff cot and looked around fiercely for Nima. There was no sine of her. He laid back and started to sob loudly and wailed so that it echoed through the halls. A door opened far down the hall and there were footsteps. “Nima!” he cried hoarsely, “Nima!” A man in a police uniform walked to his bead side, “Young man, who is Nima?” the man looked sympathetic. Dylan only shook his head and did not look the man in the eyes. “Young man you have been through a lot today, we just need to get your name and make sure you’re physically ok. We need you to stay here until the morning. Can we get your name son?”

“I’m.” he looked at the man and then looked away quickly. “My name is Dylan Gertrude.” The man nodded and then stood up, “If you need to talk to someone or if you need anything, “he handed him a card, “call this number, but for now your lunch will be brought to you very shortly .” Dylan took the card and studied it until the man walked away, he did not enjoy his presents. The clicking of the nurses heals pinched his ears until the small tray of artificial food appeared before him. “Thanks” he said crudely, the nurse nodded her head as if she knew that the food there was crap. Over the time of his stay the nurses took blood samples and went through with there physical evaluations. Dylan seemed to be fine, but what the nurses did not see was that his heart had been broken severely. That night as he lay in his stiff cot he had the sudden urge to just leave.

He swung his legs out over the side of the bed and then stood up and walked out of the building. His head was just like the storm, dark and cloudy. His feet were heavy on the pavement as he walked across the street to the beach and saw his car through the awkward darkness.
Slowly he trudged up and down the beach in search of Nima. The boat that had been brought in by the other men lay in a heap beside the small shop on the corner. His toes flung the wet sand as he ran to a dark green splotch far ahead of him on the beach. He dropped to his knees next to Nima’s sweater and held it to his body as though it were actually her. “Nima, “he whispered, “I love you, Nima.” When he collected himself he stood up quietly and walked back to his car with the soaking sweater. His home life was different, a lot different without Nima feeling her way around the house. His days grew long thinking about Nima every minute of the day. He usually stayed in bed until noon and then slumped around the house in search of any kind of happiness. He usually found it in the bathroom looking at the stain glass windows and the lion footed bathtub.


Chapter 3
After a month had gone by Dylan proposed to himself that he would move back to Oregon and try to buy there old house back. He packet up his things and Nima’s then drove along the road next to the sandy beach, taking one last look at were he had last seen Nima. The green sweater was stretched out upon the seat beside him; Dylan touched it, now and again remembering how Nima used to be. Sleep sunk in to his eyes as his eyes came across the old house on the corner.
With dreary eyes and a slumped body Dylan walked up to the old yellow house and saw no one inside. No lights shone, no cars parked, and the yard was a mess. Dylan picked up a chip of the old house and stuck it back into place were it had been. He dwelled outside of the house just staring at the fitted piece, “Boy, I wish that were my life.” The white dirty door was pretty much hanging by a single hinge. It squeaked as he opened it and walked inside the dark dusty house. Obviously the old couple had moved on or passed away, there clothes were still in the closet and there food rotted in the fridge, sending off a ghastly odor of moldy vegetables.

Dirty pots and dishes swam in a grey elixir as flies flourished on the grime. The cotton light that filtered through the window cascaded down upon a dirty pink sock with flits of orange and red. Dylan discarded of the sock and wiped the sadness from his eyes then proceeded with cleaning the household. He scraped at the dirty floor with a brush and gagged when he took out all the rotten food.
A bag of dead rats sat beside the garbage can outside the house on the side walk, a stray cat meowed curiously as it sniffed the bag then quickly scurried away as a car passed by. Billows of dust ran to the center of the room as Dylan swept the floors. The light came in through every window as it did ten years ago, spreading false hope and dreary cheer through every room. Clean china was stacked into each cabinet and every glass was set into place. Dylan dragged the clean rugs back into the house and rolled them out on to the floor then sat back and scanned the revamped room for impurities. The house was clean and lemon scented. He walked out of the house and locked the door behind him then went to the store to fill the fridge. The cold air flew in his face as he entered the big Belair and smiled seeing clean floors and people walking everywhere. He loaded up his cart with bread, fruit, milk, and other items needed to live. He put his items on the checkout counter and looked into the eyes of Sid, with no hair and stomach bulging. “Sid Jacobs, it’s been a wile.”
Sid squinted at Dylan, “Dylan! Oh wow, how are you? I’m so sorry; I know how long it’s been but…god.” He bagged Dylan’s items and put his hand on Dylan’s shoulder. “Look man, I get off in five minutes. I want to take you to lunch.” Dylan nodded and took his bags to his car.

Dylan went back to the store and sat on a bench next to the store doors. He saw Sid walk out and stood up “Hey man. Were we going?” Sid smiled “I was thinking Rubio’s, do you like fish tacos?” Dylan nodded, yeah it’s good to see you man.” They hugged and then drove off to the restaurant. They sat at a table and waited for there fish tacos Sid nervously prepared to ask his question. He looked at Dylan and said “So that girl you were taking care of how is she?” Dylan looked up from his cup of water “Oh um…well. We were living together but there was a boating accident and I lost her.” Sid founded “I’m sorry to hear that, you guys were really close huh? I mean you took care of her and everything didn’t you?” Dylan nodded, “Yeah, um…listen Sid it was nice but I have to go…do stuff. I’m busy.” Sid stood up and shook his hand “Ok pal, take it easy.” Dylan plopped down into the seat of his car and broke out in a fit of rage. He banged his steering well, kicked the dash board, and yelled at the top of his lungs. His tears never stopped flowing wile he was driving home, he ignored the people staring and once he was home unpacked the food and put it all away. By the time he had gone to his room to take a nap he was still sobbing and remembering the painful day of when he had lost the only love in his life. He fell asleep crying and woke up to a dark room of silence; his eyes were soar and his nose was plugged up. He lay in bed staring at the sealing for hours. Then he slumped out of bed and into the kitchen.

He pored himself a glass of iced tea and sat at the scuffed metal table with his hands wrapped around the cold cup. His blank stare mirrored Nima. Her pale soft skin, the curly brown hair, and her beautiful white eyes. All were treasures of Dylan’s aching heart. He finished his drink and plopped down on the old couch in the living room. He didn’t bother with the TV, it was always panic and despair, he had enough in his life at the moment. Nima bobbed into his memory every so often. A fly buzzed around his head and landed on the wall, its eyes watched him as he sat and stared up at the sealing. After thirty five years Dylan’s pattern of basic life did not change, he got out of bed, drank and ate, then moped around the house for twenty hours until he grew tired and then went back to bed. The paint on the walls faded wile the house shed its paint all over the dead grass.

On a gloomy day Dylan breathed a sigh and smiled for once after ten long years. Today he was going to take a walk and try to enjoy the day as it was, a day of letting his troubles go and forgetting.
The grey sky stole the sun; meanwhile Dylan stepped outside in a black trench coat and drearily walked down the street. The factory did not cough out smoke; it had been out of business for ten years. Now that there were hundreds of unemployed people jobs were scares and Dylan had to work nights as a stock boy for a small store were he often talked to Sid.
His grey hair swooped over his eyes as the wind pushed the front of his body. His walk was slow as he came across the very rust yard that Nima had been saved from years ago. He lifted his hand to his cold lips and stepped forward to search for the car that Nima had once told him about. This was very peculiar to Dylan; it had been long since he had set foot in the grave area. The bushes and grass had grown high; he touched them with the tips of his fingers as he went by. The pain he inflicted upon himself writhed in his heart as he forced himself to venture on. Alas he came upon the car with a breath of fear. The entire car was taken over by rust and looked as though it had been set on fire. There was no glass in the windows and the blanket Nima had once used was now a heap of ashes in the back seat. Slowly, he sat down in the back seat of the car and touched the scorched leather beneath him as though he were petting a baby rabbit. He let his head drop back as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. He awoke with his hand feeling as though it was on fire. The whole car was on fire, yellow fumes drifted up into his nose and made him gasp as he fell out of the car and rolled on the ground.

The pain from his burnt hand sent tears running down his face. He spied two kids that were running away from the area with smoke bombs in there hands. “Little twerps”, he roared with his scarf wrapped around his bloody pain stricken hand. His eyes were blood shot from all the fumes; he had gotten dizzy, wile stumbling home he tripped and fell flat on his face on the side walk. Blood rushed from his head, there was no one around to hear or help him in this time of need. “Sir? Sir?” A man knelt down beside him and checked his pulse. “Oh dear lord.” The beat of his heart was scarcely evident. The man’s bony hands grasped the man and studied his face. The man said nothing and called an ambulance to pick them up. He unwrapped the scarf from his hand and gasped, his charcoal colored hand was a mess. Soon enough they were picked up and Dylan’s hand was treated. Through all the hustle and bustle his eyes stayed shut, never emitting a sound or moving. From his car the man looked Dylan over as they arrived back at his house. “My poor son.” Dylan’s father stroked his hair and saw that his eyes were opening. “Dylan?” his father said, getting exited. “Nima?” Dylan frowned knowing that it was not her. “Nima who’s Nima? I’m your father Dillard, don’t you remember me?” Dylan squinted at his fathers wrinkled face and shook his head, “How could I?” he was drowsy as he spoke and never made eye contact. Dylan lifted his hand to release himself from the car but could not because his hand was bound too tightly for him to maneuver. “Let me out, father or whoever you are.” Dylan sounded possessed as he droned nonsensically on and on wile his father helped him inside. “Nice place”, there was no answer. They shuffled down onto the couch and sat in utter silence. “Dylan?” he had fallen asleep quickly. His father placed a blanket over him and walked around the kitchen, staring out into the back yard. “What has become of you my poor boy?” his whisperings carried on for an hour. Dylan woke up and looked at his father,” James Manic, so you’re my father?” James turned on his heal fast and looked at his son with wild eyes. “So you live!” Dylan looked down at his hand and sighed. “Was I a horrible kid?” James nodded and stood next to the couch and helped Dylan up. “I was a horrid father, but you probably knew that.” Dylan laughed,” How could I tell? You were never around.” James shrugged, “I wasn’t caught out for parenting, sorry kid.” Dylan shook his head, “Then what are you doing here? Moms dead, I bet you never bothered to come around because you were afraid of what might begin to love you.” James grew angry and stormed out, he shut the door then stood looking out at the bare lawn. “Sorry boy”, he walked away silently and never looked back like he had done before as he drove down the grey streets of Oregon, one tear fell from his eye – only one.

Dylan grew mad and picked up a glass in attempt to throw it and smash it on the wall but dropped it in pure agony from his bandaged hand. “Damb you father!” His hand healed over time. Ten more long lonely years passed away like death the help of alcohol and cigarettes aided him as if they were his only friends. He had been fired from his job because he had shown up at work intoxicated and was very violent. His cable, electricity, and everything else had been shut off due to not paying the bills that piled high at the door. Dylan could have cared less, he had no need for those things.

On a Sunday morning Dylan had been driving along to San Francisco to remember what he had once lost. His face felt the unfamiliar warmness of the beach sun. The long busy streets of China town hustled and bustled with people of all authenticities. The dead chickens and pigs that hung in the windows made Dylan hungry, after an hour of searching for a place to park he managed to spy a small space about a half a mile away from the main street of the town. Down a slanted side walk he walked, the main stream of people were almost in sight. A wavy haired girl caught his sight, “Nima? Nima!” He ran down the side walk and tripped as he flew and skinned his knee just as he reached the spot were he thought he had seen Nima. He quickly stood up and looked around furiously and ran every were limping like a mad man. “Damb it” he stopped at a bakery and ordered a steamed bow. “I know you’re still alive, I just know it.” Tomorrow was Dylan’s birthday, he would be turning 55 and Nima would have been 52. As Dylan chewed the bow he thought of going out onto a sail boat and then kicked a pigeon. He walked along the dirty stinky streets and bought three Chinese beers and another bow. He took another long walk down to the beach and dragged the big boat into the cold water that splashed onto his legs and shirtless chest. He jumped into the boat and began to sail out. He looked to the sky and checked for any signs of rain or a storm. “I need your groovy sky’s Nima, my little rainbow. I miss you, I thought I saw you today, but I guess it wasn’t you. Oh well, I think about you all the time.” He sniffed the open bottle of beer and cried as he drank. “I love you Nima, if your out there please come home or give me a sign that your ok….anything.” A bird flew down and perched on the sail “That’s good enough.”
Chapter 4
He lay down on the bottom of the boat and looked up at the clouds swirling in the sky. His boat bumped a rock and made him sit up; he was on the other side of the beach. The sand was more soft and dry; there was a lot more trash and a number of houses on the sand. He jumped out of the boat and left two of the three bottles and finished the last beer wile he scoped out the foreign beach. His feet took him to a white house were three women were sitting and drinking tea. One of the women looked so much like Nima, he walked closer. “Nima?” The woman looked up,”Yes?” Dylan gasped and ran to her, “It’s me Dylan.” The woman tilted her head, “I don’t know a Dylan, are you sure that’s your name?” Dylan laughed, “That’s a funny joke Nima, now let’s go home.” Nima got up “I told you I don’t know you.” The women that were sitting had gotten up and went inside to leave the two to there own lives. “Yes you do Nima, you’re my little rainbow and I’m your big sun.” He looked at her desperately, “Do you remember anything? Because I know you.” Nima slapped him “I said I don’t know you.” She looked mad and short tempered. “Now I’ve been through a lot and I…I just don’t know how to handle this….whoever you are.’ Dylan took her hand “I know it’s you.” She sighed “Ok, we can sit down and talk about this. Now who are you exactly?” Dylan smiled “We are a couple and you fell off the boat that we were on…just like that one.” He pointed to the one off on the shore. “Ok…everyone in San Francisco knows about that, how can I know that’s really who you say you are. I mean I don’t even know who I am.”

“I know this may sound crazy but I saved you from a junk yard when we were little kids, in Oregon, remember?” Nima shook her head “It’s not ringing any bells.” After a wile Dylan’s story telling got old and she was tired. “Look Dylan, I still don’t know what you’re talking about, but I appreciate you trying to help me out. I can’t tell you how man men and women have come by telling me similar stories, but oddly enough yours sounds a tad bit more believable. What do you suppose we do? Huh?” Dylan shrugged, “It’s my birthday tomorrow, would you like to come back to my house and maybe possibly remember a few things?” Nima laughed “Ok I’ll humor you, when do we leave?” “When it’s good for you.” “I’m about ready, let me just get my few things and we can go.” She got up and looked back right before she went inside, “Are you sure you’re who you say you are and who you say I am?” Dylan nodded, “As sure as you are beautiful.” Nima smiled and ran inside. Dylan smiled and looked to the ocean then remembered the green sweater that was at home, maybe that would trigger her memory to come back. “Ok let’s go, I told the people who I was staying with that I was leaving and would call if anything happened.” Dylan nodded “Ok then, you hopefully will not be disappointed.” “Can I ask you something personal?” Dylan nodded “Yeah anything you want.” Nima whispered “Did we ever. You know. Have sex? “Dylan laughed “No, but we have kissed.” Nima blushed and sat down in the passenger’s seat. “We have a lot of history together huh?” Dylan looked over” If only you could remember.”




Chapter 5
The trees on the sides of the roads lit up the afternoon. There points poked holes in the skies like needles. There trunks grasped the earth like giant fists digging into the ground. Nima slept wile Dylan drifted in and out of sleep until he finally pulled into a gas station. Nima groaned and turned to the left. Dylan got out and stretched his legs, he shot a smile to Nima and walked towards the mini food mart. The bathrooms stunk like manure and the toilet paper was paper thin and ripped easily. He had to pull at a certain angle to get as much toilet paper as he needed. He washed his face in the sink and looked at his features and clapped his hands together. “Dylan man you did it.” He stepped out and walked back to the car, he did not see Nima. He looked in the food mart and in the bathrooms and franticly ran back to the car. Her luggage was gone and a small note was left on the dash board that said “Dylan, I just can’t imagine that your stories are true, you’re a nice person but I have to figure things out on my own. Thanks for Caring, Nima. P.S. I really hoped that your stories were true, we could have been nice together.” Dylan crumpled up the not and banged his fists on the side of the car “Damb it!” He saw the woods across the street and laughed at the thought of the girl trudging through with her suitcase back to San Francisco. He sighed and looked up at the moon then sadly buckled in.” I guess I’ll see you again soon, or at least when you snap out of it.” He drove home with the wind in his hair and the moon behind him leading Nima home.

Back at home he pulled into the drive way slowly and weary eyed. He unlocked the front door and walked into the dark place, his hand fumbled for the switch then flipped the lights on. The sad welcoming room was warm and inviting. He sat down on the couch and knew that Nima was most certainly the girl that he had seen; it’s just that Nima did not believe that she was really Nima. He looked to the back door and saw a white cat scratching at the door and thought about how they have nine lives. He questioned how many life’s humans have and if cats really have that many lives. He also thought about different souls from people who had passed away being apart of one living soul. He lit a cigarette and dove into the smoky ride that let his mind be at ease. He did not smoke a lot but took the ride when he was feeling the most stressful; he had picked it up after Nimas accident.

The flickering bulbs above him went out suddenly just as Dylan was drifting off to sleep. In the morning he would be 55 and still lonely and his couch was singed to a crispy pile of ashes. He woke up screaming, half his chests was smoldering and hot were skin had once been, he crawled to the phone and called the police for an ambulance. He cried put in pain and banged his fists on the ground until the ambulance entered his house and alleviated his pain with a large amount of drugs. They wheeled him off and out of his house and into the ambulance, he gained consciousness the next day and cringed feeling the still painful burns that were now wrapped in bandages and felt cooler than before. His hand was just a joke compared to what pain had been inflicted on his chest; he seemed to always find a way to get burned physically and mentally. The nurses eventually got around to changing his bandages and told him that most burn patients get that way by leaving the cigarette in there mouths and falling asleep, that made Dylan feel so much better about himself. “You know you’re lucky it didn’t burn down into your vitals.” Dylan laughed “I’ve already been burned there many times, let me tell you.” The nurse chuckled and stretched the gauze out over his chest “Who hasn’t.” Dylan smiled at her and sighed “You know you are a looker, are you going to college?” She shook her head, “Just graduated, don’t you know I’m a nurse honey?” He rolled his eyes “Sorry, I was smoking remember, it kills brain sells.” The nurse smiled and finished the bandage changing with an awkward pause. “You got yourself a boy friend?” The nurse looked taken a back and shook her head “Now why would you want to know that? I’m only forty three and your?” “Fifty five today, it’s my birthday today and I would appreciate it if you didn’t rub my age in my face thank you.”

“I’m sorry, happy birthday….Dylan is it?” He nodded, “So do you have a date or not…Heather is it?” She nodded “My calendar is empty birthday boy “What do you suppose we do?” “Have a private party here of course, since I am in this condition and you are a nurse.” “Very good idea, you know you are allowed to leave tomorrow, your healing pretty quickly.” He nodded, “Shall we do something tomorrow then?” Heather nodded to “Yes I suppose we shall, can I make dinner for you at my place?” “Yes I suppose you shall, my old bones can’t cook anyway, so you would be doing me a favor.” Heather laughed “You don’t look that old, you have a date with someone young like me.” He nodded “That much is true.” She picked up her supplies “Well I’ll be back around eight to see how you’re doing and I might have a special surprise for you to.” “Your not going to jump out of a cake are you?” “Darn you knew already.” “By Heather” “By Dylan, don’t be hitting on any other nurses, you’re my patient.” He smiled wile she turned and walked away noticing her tight features. He looked up at the ceiling, “Dylan you’re a lucky man.”
He slept well due to the comfort of his new friend and the massive load of drugs that inhabited him. Night mares scorched his mind and strangled his heart as if Nima were standing over him ready to say hello again. "NIMA!!" He yelled sitting up in his bed. A light switched on as a nurse, Heather, ran to his side with swift clicking white plastic shoes and made him set his head back. The bandages had broken and the burns were seeping, his chest was on fire. "Oh god!!" he roared grasping the sides of his beds, iduring the painfull burns franticly covered by Heathers quick hands.












Chapter 6
Spider webs stretched from each corner wile dust collected everywhere in the house. One evening when Dylan was just wakening up from his nap he heard slow footsteps outside his door and sat up. “Who’s there?” There was no answer, just the sound of the slow foot steps. His hoarse voice matched his old body. Oh how age had gotten him. Wile picking up a small vase, he opened the door and peered outside. He dropped the vase, “Nima!” The old woman turned her slender body to him and smiled with her sad milky white eyes. “Dylan?” He clutched his chest and tried to slow his breathing as Nima stretched her hands out in front of her trying to touch Dylan desperately. “I, I though you were dead.” He touched her old hands and gathered tears in his eyes. She wore a bright yellow blouse and a black pencil skirt. The white curly hair atop her head matched the whiteness of her eyes. “You’re still as beautiful as I remember.” Nima blushed,” Your voice is as handsome as ever.” There old bodies embraced, both crying and reminiscing as they both told there story. The vase laid abandoned wile they stepped into the house. “I washed up on the shore across from the one that we had pushed off from. A week later some people found me crawling around topless. They took me in. Oh, they were so nice and understood everything that I had been through.” Dylan beamed as proud as ever with her hands in his. “I had amnesia for about a two year period and then right when I had woken up from a nap it hit me, I live in Organ with a guy name Dylan. I was so frightened that you wouldn’t remember me. Plus I remembered you had come by a long time ago, I worried that you may have been mad at me and did not want to see me again.
Then I spent months and months looking for you, that’s the only thing I didn’t remember, I had forgotten were you lived.” Nima stopped to kiss Dylan then continued. “When I had finally remembered the yellow apartment the people living there said that you were long gone. So I told the people who I was living with to let me go to Organ by myself. They let me obviously, so there I was crawling around on your porch until you came outside.” Her cheeks were red with excitement and her hands felt the burns on his hands. “What happened here?”

Dylan pulled his hand away, “Just a little burn, nothing to worry about.” Nima shook her head “You’re always so protective of yourself Dylan, now let me see.” He handed himself over and let her rub ointment on his scars. “There all better.” His hand was cool and felt nice in the small breeze that came in through the open window. “Let me feel your face Dylan.” He leaned forward and ran her fingers over his features, his lips, his cheeks, his nose, and his chin. “You haven’t changed a bit.” Dylan placed his hands on her cheeks, “Neither have you dove.” She pulled a piece of old parchment from out of her pocket and placed it in his lap. “Do you remember this?” He unfolded the paper and saw the bright red heart beat up at him. “How could I forget?” he took her hand and placed it on his. “Your heart is connected to mine by love.” Dylan pulled Nima to him from the couch and kissed her neck. “You old romantic” she kissed his forehead. “You know I did take classes at an art gallery. They said I am one of the first blind women to ever paint. I’m in a book now.” Dylan smiled; I knew you’d be famous.” Nima shook her head, “That does not matter, I love you, that’s what matters.”
Dylan nodded, “Your right, you’ve always been right.” Nima sighed and looked up toward the open window. “You know I’m dieing Nima.” She snapped out from her daze and stared hard at were she thought Dylan was. “What?” Dylan sighed, “I have pancreatic cancer, and I’m on hospice. I didn’t want to tell you because you seemed so happy.” Nima ran her hand up his arm to his shoulder,” I’m still happy, you’re in the house you grew up in. And I’ll take care of you and make you as comfterble as possible.” Dylan began to cry and held Nima tightly, “I’m scared stiff, but it’s ok because you’re here.” They sat holding each other for gosh knows how long. Eventually Nima fell asleep on the couch; Dylan put a blanket over her and watched as she breathed calmly. “You’re going to be ok”, Dylan whispered as he sat in a chair, he slept beside her all night watching her as her chest rose and fell. The next morning Nima woke up to find that Dylan was still in the chair beside her. She stood up and stretched her old bones” Good morning sun shine.” She heard no reply as she turned around. “Dylan?” His body was silent and still. Her hands trembled wile she felt his chest, no heart beat. The cold body slumped in the chair, Nima shook with fright. “No, you were going to be alright, you were going to be happy, we were going to be happy.” Nima shrieked and clutched her head as her breathing sped up. Her sobbing was quiet as she curled up on the floor and stared up at Dylan’s dead body with her milky white eyes.


The sad end



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