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Yes today 2/23 I relapsed, cut. Friday was my Birthday and after getting my license, going to band and IHOP me my friend Brian, Brandy, Bruno, Jessica and Xav went to Target then hung out in the movie theater parking lot. We ended up spliting a pack of cigs between us, I still have three in my truck. I have to say I greatly enjoyed the cigs (yes more than one) that I smoked while I was smoking them. But after words I felt like s**t, I know I shouldn't have done it but I didn't know what else to do. They seemed like the perfect way to drive away the urge to cut. It worked until about 1:30 this morning. Early this morning I took apart my shaving razor and instead of making a few long deep cuts, I made lots of very small cuts just deep enough to draw blood. Two people know what I've recently done, both are disapointed in me. I feel like s**t for it, I think I need some ******** help. I've told a group of my friends but I can still only bring myself to bring it up with just a few people, one RL friend, and two internet friends.
 The Magical Mellophone · Sun Feb 24, 2008 @ 03:48am · 2 Comments |
