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s**t! This sucks! I can't feel depressed anymore! I know its a good thing I guess but now I don't ever feel sad! I only ******** pissed off and I actually curse now! I dislike cursing but I feel like opening up abit BUT I DON'T WANT TO!
Its your fault isn't it? Your the one who made me happy but you also piss me off. I love you but I also hate everything about you. You do nothing anymore but piss me off, but I still deal with you. I take these pills because I know it will make you happy to see me not depressed anymore. Now all I can feel is Anger or Happiness but I think that happiness is just me being hyper. The pills aren't doing that much anymore. I feel like a monster now because I really don't give a ******** about whats going on anymore! I am going downhill now and I can see it, but I keep it all away from you so you don't have to worry. I am afraid of your reaction because it just makes me feel like crying, but I can't cry anymore because I don't feel sadness. When I try to talk to you, you just ignore me and I tolerate it....its understandable...I try to hard to talk to you everyday and I got nothing to talk about but sex. Its not my fault I was sheltered for a time. I only try to talk to you because your here most of the time. I feel like crying but I still can't. I can't play a video game without cursing at everyone because I died. I hit my brother more then ever now and sometimes I don't even know it. I know its your fault. These pills have changed me and its going out of control. I was able to control myself before but not anymore. These pills have opened the door to the feelings I have tried so hard for so long to hide. I can't lie to anyone anymore, I can only tell the truth and nothing but the truth because I have no fear of what goes on afterwards.
I am not suicidal anymore but I wish I was dead right now so I can just disappear and you wouldn't have to care that much anymore...I know you will think about me every now and then, but that can't last too long because you have someone to ease the pain. At least, you found a way out of your hell better then I found a way out of mine. I am probably not making any sense, but then again how can you understand what I am talking about when you don't even listen to me that much! I dislike talking about myself! I hate it! I don't wanna talk about me! I wanna listen to you! You make me smile, you make me feel loved, you ease the pain, you will forever be a part of me because of the relationship we have/had, but now I can feel it deteriorating and I am starting to lose my sanity. I just wanna yell but I can't do that because I don't want to.
I hope your happy with what you've done to me, because now I can't go back. I am stuck like this and I doubt theres another type of drug you want to shove down my throat to turn me into something else.
This is even more worse then the dream (not nightmare) I had about chopping off a girl's arms and legs and dumping her into the ocean while she was still alive, or that dream I had about taking him away from you, opening his chest with a knife, pulling his ribs out of him, shoving it up his nose and turning him into a scarecrow.
I didn't have a problem before, depression is normal, everyone experiences it, you should have let time heal me then pressuring me into forcing it all to stop.

Regardless, I still love you and it hurts me to talk to you because your the one who caused it all to start...

I doubt anyone could ever guess who I was talking about...actually I am talking about 3. sweatdrop No more depression or sadness, only anger stressed