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Not only has my CD still not showed up, the shipping service didn't even have the decency to answer my email yet. This is getting way more frustrating than it needs to be. Also, out of sheer boredom I began a list of stupid rules for Hogwarts. I'm not sure if these are funny or not, but who gives a damn. Here ya go-

1. Nothing made during potions class should be dumped on the floor and used as a slip ‘n slide.
2. I am not the sexiest thing since self-spelling wands.
3. My name is not Smoochy the Pretty Pink Hippogriff and I should not sign my assignments as such.
4. Professor Flitwick is not a hobbit.
5. Stop calling Professor Dumbledore Santa.
6. Professor Snape does not “just need a hug”.
7. I am not allowed to charm the suits of armor to shout “Ni!” at everyone who passes them.
8. The prefect’s bathroom is for bathing, not for starting nudist colonies.
9. Professor Trelawney isn’t really a giant bug, and spraying her with Raid is not appropriate.
10. I am not allowed to sing ‘Come on Baby Light My Fire’ in potions class anymore.
11. There isn’t an Audrey Two in the school greenhouses, so I should stop bringing first years to feed to it.
12. Stop calling the first years n00bs.
13. “Eat my shorts” is not a real curse.
14. Humming the Jaws theme whenever Professor Snape enters a room is not appropriate.
15. Professor McGonagall is not “teh smex”.
16. Professor Slughorn is not a weeble.
17. I am not allowed call an all-school Battle Royale.
18. The sorting hat does not make me look fat.
19. “ROFLMAO” Is not the proper incantation for a cheering charm.
20. “My owl ate my homework.” Is not a good excuse.