You ever sit up late at night, the insomnia making you want to die and to top it all off you just had the worst thing that could happen to you happen to you? I told myself I wasn't going to cry about it anymore... that I was going to be strong and become a better person, and I know that she can't stand the thought of me... so why is it that I want to see her now. I want to hold her more then ever... but she's not okay. I'm not there, so I can't see it, but I've always been one to believe in things I can't see, and maybe it's just me panicing because I'm prone to worry... but I know she's hurting herself again, and this time it's my fault! She's going to hurt and hurt untill she gets over me, sees me, or dies... and the first one will take her too long (not to sound egocentric), the second one won't happen untill she stops ignoring me, and the third one's out of the question! What am I supposed to do untill she gets over it... and when she does, how will I go on. I could always lie to myself... I could always lie to her... what she doesn't see is that NOTHING she says or does to herself is going to solv the problem. If she hurts herself, I blame myself and hurt myself, even if I'm not perposly inflicting pain upon myself... it's there and it keeps me up at night.
xxAngela_Ashxx · Thu Jul 12, 2007 @ 10:02pm · 0 Comments |