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Noodle's Discarded Diary
11. For Want of a Wrench
Noodle woke from her slumber just as the first few rays of sunlight came through the window of the shelter. Gently untangling herself from Sunmoonstars's arms, she sat up and brushed the hair out of her eyes, trying to wake herself up further. She wanted to get out and working on the boat as soon as possible. She was bound and determined to get the sail put up today, and she wanted to utilize every ounce of daylight available.

She glanced out the window at the slowly brightening beach. The seagulls weren't out yet, and in the early morning light it almost…almost…looked peaceful and serene. In another hour it would be bright, noisy and smelly, as all the trash baked under the hot sun, but for now, she let herself enjoy just a few moments of the peaceful ocean view.

Too bad I don't have some coffee and a cigarette, she thought wryly, staring out at the rising sun. Although I could probably find a morning newspaper out there if I looked hard enough. It'd probably be a bit out of date, but beggars can't be choosers, I suppose. Chuckling softly to herself, she decided it was time to get going.

She looked down at Sunmoonstars, still nestled comfortably beside her, still breathing in slow, even hisses that signified sleep. She smiled gently at him (for he was an "it" no longer…she couldn't think of the creature as an "it" now that she had given him a name) and reached down to give him a gentle pat. He stirred ever so slightly and drew a bit closer. It was funny…she certainly wouldn't have pegged the skeletal monster as a cuddlebug, but there it was. Not that she minded, in any event. There had been no helicopter dreams last night, and that was certainly a welcome change.

Her smile widened and she took hold of his shoulder and gently shook him awake. "Hey," she said softly, as he gave a snorting hiss and raised his head slightly. "It's time to get up. The sun's up."

He sat up groggily and shook his head slightly, as if trying to clear the sleep from it. Giving him a moment to wake up fully, Noodle crawled over to the corner of the shelter, where they kept a dented coffee can with a white plastic lid (the lid didn't go with the coffee can; she had found both of them separately in the refuse around them, but it fit, and that was what was important). She opened it up and took out a few of the leftover roasted squid tentacles. Then, she opened an old, ten gallon industrial bucket next to the coffee can to reveal a dark, vaguely smokey scented liquid. She picked up a chipped blue coffee mug without a handle and Sunmoonstars's water bowl and filled them both up with jellyfish juice. Resealing the bucket, she picked up the monster's rations and brought them over to him, then grabbed her own food and sat down next to him.

"I'm going to get the mast put up today," she told Sunmoonstars as the two of them quickly ate their breakfast. "I swear, that thing is going up even if it kills me. It's funny…I've got everything I need-the mast, the sail, the base, the bolts. But I can't get the bolts tight enough. The weight of the mast just pulls them back out of the base no matter how much I tighten them with my hands. Makes me wonder why I can't find some old, beat up tools in with all this garbage. Doesn't anyone ever throw their tools away when they get new ones?"

Sunmoonstars looked at her, shrugged, and slurped an entire tentacle down as though it were an oversized strand of spaghetti.

"Your table manners are still atrocious," she told him, taking a sip of the jellyfish juice. "You're lucky I spent most of my life living with three rowdy men, so I'm used to it. Otherwise, I'm sure I'd be terribly offended." She stuck her tongue out at him.

He slurped up the rest of the jellyfish juice out of his bowl loudly in response. Setting down the bowl, he stretched his long arms out over his head as if limbering himself up for the day's activities.

"Will you catch us some more fish this morning?" she asked him. Seagull hunting seemed to be fruitful at all hours of the day, but the fishing was best in the morning. "Just for about an hour. After that, I'll need you to stop by the boat. I might need your help getting the mast up."

He nodded and got up. Noodle quickly swallowed one last bite of squid tentacle and then gulped down the rest of her jellyfish juice. Setting down the cup, she cleared her throat, then belched explosively. Another thing she had 2D to thank for teaching her. "Beat that," she told the startled Sunmoonstars smugly.

Sunmoonstars, frozen in the act of pulling one of his gloves off, seemed almost taken aback. After considering a moment, he gave her a slight bob of his head, as if acknowledging her mastery of horrific table manners.

Grinning ridiculously, as if she'd actually accomplished something important, Noodle got to her feet, gave her friend a pat on the arm, and headed out the door of the shelter. Following the curve of the shoreline, she moved toward the cove where her little boat was kept. She climbed to the top of a trash ridge and saw Sunmoonstars walking along the beach, heading in the opposite direction. The creature was stripped down to his pants and boots and he was carrying the large, dented washtub. As Noodle watched, he reached the tip of a small garbage peninsula and set down the metal tub. He leaned over and pulled off his boots, revealing feet that were much like his hands-huge and light green, with long, crooked toes ending in sharp yellow claws. Choosing his footing carefully now that his feet had no protection, he moved to the very edge of the beach and a moment later, dove into the water with a loud SPLASH!

Mentally wishing him luck, Noodle started down the other side of the ridge, as usual, keeping one eye on her destination and the other on the ground in front of her. This vigilance wasn't only to protect herself from tripping on the jumbled refuse underfoot, but was also to keep an eye out for anything that might be useful. She had found a lot of materials for the boat this way, just by keeping her eyes peeled while walking about, rather than actively searching for them. Why, the tarp she was planning to use as a sail had been found only two days ago when she had ducked behind a couple of junked cars for a quick bathroom break. The blue tarp had actually been rolled up in the back seat of one of them! It had one or two holes in it, but they were easily patched with hot rubber from melted tires. It was amazing what she could find if she simply kept her eyes peeled. Now, if only she could find a wrench or something to tighten those bolts and anchor the mast properly, she would be all set.

As she started up a smaller hill, she realized that she could hear a strange sound coming from the other side. Muffled and coming in short, quick bursts, it almost sounded like someone coughing softly.

Her first thought was that it was Sunmoonstars, and she started up the hill again with concern. After all, they were the only two people on this island, so any sound that came from a person would have to have been made by him. But he was far behind her, fishing in the sea, and she didn't think he could have gotten from there to the other side of this hill without her seeing him, especially since she hadn't lost sight of the beach once. This gave her pause…and she slowed down as she reached the crest of the hill. Could there be someone else on this island? Someone else that neither of them had noticed until now? It seemed utterly impossible…but then, if it was, then who was coughing on the other side of this hill?

Screwing up her courage, Noodle crept to the top of the hill, looked down and saw…

Nothing.

There was no one down there.

Noodle's legs almost buckled in relief, and she laughed softly to herself. Of COURSE there was no one else around. She would have seen them long before this if there were. What she had thought was coughing was probably only the wind making some trash rustle.

I think I've been out here too long…I'm starting to jump at shadows. Sure, I've lived at a studio full of zombies, been chased by black helicopters, attacked by pirates, and I sleep next to a demon at night, but one plastic bag rustles in the wind and I practically wet my pants in terror. She laughed at her own foolishness and started down the slope.

And then she heard it again.

This time there was no mistaking the sound of coughing. Noodle immediately darted behind the nearest pile of junk and stuck her head out from behind it, looking down the slope in an attempt to locate the source of the noise. It seemed to issue from beside a broken, overturned washing machine, but look as she may, Noodle couldn't see anyone beside it. Just a headless teddy bear, a few pop cans, and a rotten melon rind. She was not lulled into a false sense of security again, however. Remaining on guard, she kept her eyes on the spot and waited.

Sure enough, a few moments later, the coughing sound came again, and Noodle spotted a slight movement down by the washing machine

Poking her head out a little further from her hiding place, she gazed down the slope to see what it was.

It was a pelican.

The same one that she and Sunmoonstars had seen flying away the previous night when they were heading back to the shelter.

It was huddled beside the broken washing machine, its ratty, gray-brown feathers blending into the refuse it was resting on, which was probably why she hadn't seen it before. Its flesh-ringed, almost reptilian looking eyes were dull and cloudy, and its head was bent slightly, as if something was weighing it down. As she watched, it stuck its neck out and gave that dry, gagging cough again.

She wondered what was wrong with it. Was it sick or hurt? Could it even still fly? It certainly hadn't looked like it had had much energy for flying when they had seen it last night, since it had barely been able to clear the ridges it flew over. And it looked even worse today. She wished for a moment that Sunmoonstars was there with her, since he had certainly seemed interested in catching the pelican when they had seen it last night. It was a shame he would have to miss out again.

But there's nothing that says I can't try and catch it, she realized. After all, it didn't look like it would be able to escape her easily. She didn't need Sunmoonstars's hunting skills to be able to catch it if it couldn't fly. And it would definitely make a fine meal. It was at least twice the size of the seagulls they had been eating.

Looking around, she quickly spotted a broken bedpost that she could use as a club. She picked it up and began to creep down the hill toward the unsuspecting pelican.

"It is awfully kind of you to put him out of his misery," said a dry voice from above her.

She screamed, startled out of her mind, and leaped backwards, away from the voice. She quickly swung her makeshift club in a wide arc around herself, wanting to keep back the murderer/pirate/monster/ghost/whatever it was.

"Of course, if you're not more careful, you're likely to put yourself out of your misery first, the way you're leaping around and swinging that thing," the voice said dully.

Noodle looked up in the direction the voice was coming from and saw a seagull perched on top of a shattered computer monitor that looked like it came from the 80's. It regarded her with apathy, its eye looking even duller and cloudier than the pelican's.

"Did…did you say that?" she asked, feeling a bit foolish. Although talking animals were a rarity, they did exist (she had known a few of them at Kong), but she had certainly doubted that there would be any on this isolated hunk of trash in the middle of the ocean.

"You don't see anyone else around, do you?" the seagull asked her mildly. "Except for Pelican, but he's rather busy at the moment." The bird nodded in the direction of the pelican, who was coughing again. "Are you ever going to get on with it?" the seagull called down the slope to the sick pelican. "If you're going to throw that thing up, or drop dead, or shart, or whatever you're planning to do, can you spare us the drawn-out theatrics?"

She heard the pelican mumble something that she couldn't make out, and then start hacking again.

"Never did listen to me," the seagull said flatly. It turned and preened a wing halfheartedly.

"What's wrong with him?" Noodle asked, gesturing down the slope toward the pelican. "Is he sick?"

"Ate something that didn't agree with him, or so he told me," the seagull replied. "He says it's stuck in his throat. I always did have him pegged as the type who'd eat something first and ask questions later. It certainly serves him right."

Before Noodle could open her mouth to reply, she heard a clambering from the other side of the slope and a second later, Sunmoonstars scrambled to the top, a small fish still clutched in his claws.

"Why it's the Boogieman, come to end us all," said the gull with a yawn. "How poetic."

Noodle waved to the masked creature sheepishly. She guessed he had heard her scream and had come to see if she was all right. "I'm okay," she called up to him. "This seagull just startled me. Sorry about that."

"A friend of yours, I see," the gull observed. "I shouldn't be surprised, given how both of you seem to have the exact same reaction to seeing a bird. He's better at it than you though," the gull nodded toward Sunmoonstars, who was coming down the slope to join her. "Ate one of my uncles a few days ago."

Noodle suddenly thought of the dozens upon dozens of seagull carcasses that she and Sunmoonstars had cleaned, carved, dried and now had sitting in containers in the shelter. She was starting to feel like an accomplice to a serial killer. "I'm….I'm sorry," she said uselessly, beginning to better remember why she had been a vegetarian in her youth. "We…we were hungry and…"

"I understand," the seagull said, sounding no more interested in the conversation than if they had been talking about the weather. "Circle of life and all that. Besides, he was a bore at parties."

"I…uh…um…" Noodle stammered, trying to think of something to say.

"Are YOU every going to get on with it?" the gull asked her, sounding a bit annoyed.

"I…um…'get on with it?'" Noodle asked.

"With putting us out of our misery," the seagull explained to her.

"'Us?'" Noodle asked, just as Sunmoonstars started forward. She stuck her arm in front of him to keep him where he was. "What, you're sick too?"

"Sick of this place," the gull told her.

"That's hardly a good reason to throw your life away," Noodle scolded the bird. "We're stuck here too, but you don't see US giving up!"

"Yes, I saw the little raft you're building," the seagull replied. "Terribly charming. I'm sure it will last all of ten minutes if you run into a storm."

"Well, at least we're not just lying down and giving up!" Noodle snapped. "It might be dangerous, but we're not just going to sit here waiting to die."

"And I'm sure that will be a consolation to you both when you capsize," the gull retorted evenly. "Will you get on with it now? You or the Boogieman?" he said, nodding to Sunmoonstars. "I'm sure you're both hungry, correct?"

Noodle put up her arm yet again to keep Sunmoonstars from attacking. "No," she told the bird. "I'm not going to let you just commit suicide like that!"

Sunmoonstars looked at her with his head cocked to the side, as if wondering why she seemed perfectly fine with eating unwilling victims but refused to devour something that actually WANTED to be eaten.

"Quiet," she told him, not really feeling like explaining right now. Especially since she didn't feel like she even HAD a good explanation. It just felt wrong to her.

"I don't believe he said anything," said the seagull with disinterest.

"You be quiet too," Noodle told him in irritation. She looked down the slope at the still coughing pelican. "I'm going to go down there and see if I can help your friend. Since I assume he doesn't share your 'optimistic' outlook on things?"

"I don't suppose he'd turn down your help, if that's what you're asking," the seagull replied.

Noodle started down the hill, motioning for Sunmoonstars to join her, since she didn't quite trust leaving him alone with the depressed seagull. Once she reached the bottom, she knelt carefully beside the coughing pelican, noticing with amusement that it was wearing a tiny red bobble hat. "Hello?" she said, placing her hands gently on its back and smoothing the dull, grayish feathers.

The bird hacked a few more times, then looked up at the two of them. "Oh hello," it gasped out, its voice inflection rising and falling erratically. "It's the Grim Reaper and…and you," it added, focusing a bleary eye on just Noodle. "Are you an angel?"

She laughed slightly. "No, I'm not an angel," she told it. "I'm Noodle."

"Didn't think noodles came when you were dying," the pelican said, in between coughs. "And I thought the Grim Reaper would be wearing a shirt." It shook its head violently as if trying to dislodge something. "Sorry I can't say a proper hello. I couldn't get this sorted before you two came." He hacked again.

"You're not dead, and we're not here to take you to the afterlife," Noodle explained to him. "I came to see if there's anything I can do to help."

"I'm in a frightful condition," the pelican told her. In addition to the odd rising and falling voice inflection, it had a strange habit of stretching random words out. "I ate a lump of metal. Thought it was a fish. Both of them are shiny. But it didn't go down my throat like a fish. Not slippery enough. Now I can't get it out."

"Can I see?" Noodle asked him, reaching out to touch his throat pouch. She actually thought she could see a lump in there, which was probably whatever "shiny thing" he had swallowed.

"I guess you can't make it worse," the pelican told her. He stretched his neck out a bit for her.

Noodle gently felt the bird's throat pouch, and sure enough, felt something hard and roughly a foot long inside, near where the pouch met his throat. It was narrow too, but seemed to flare out a bit at both ends. Which would make it hard to swallow, she supposed. And hard to cough back up as well. "I wonder if I can move it around a bit and make it easier for you to spit out," she said. Without waiting for a response, she took hold of the end of it through the thin leathery pouch and began to gently wiggle it back and forth. It seemed to work at first, as the obstruction seemed fairly loose and Noodle didn't feel much resistance when she moved it. But when she tried to pull it forward, the resistance increased and she felt her fingers begin to slip. Trying to keep from losing her grip on whatever it was, Noodle gave it a final hard tug.

It moved forward slightly….stopped…and then her fingers slipped from it and it bounced back into the pelican's throat.

The pelican gave several loud, harsh hacks to keep the object from sliding further into his throat. "Oh, don't do that, don't do that…" he gasped out. "If it goes back any further, I won't be able to breathe. That's much worse than coughing!"

"Okay, okay," Noodle reassured him. "I'll try to figure out another way to get it out." She thought for a moment. "Maybe if you open your mouth, I can reach in there and grab it."

"I guess it's worth a try," the pelican said, and held open his beak for her.

Noodle reached inside and gently felt around for the object. The inside of the pouch was a bit wet and slimy, and she grimaced. Summoning a bit more courage, she reached a little further back into the bird's throat. Just as her fingers touched smooth, slick metal, the pelican's gag reflex kicked in and she lost her grip on the object.

"Damn it!" she shouted, as the pelican shook her hand free from his mouth. "I almost had it!"

Next to her, Sunmoonstars gave a hissing sigh of boredom and sat down on the washing machine. He was still holding the fish he'd brought with him, and it dangled from his long fingers by its tail.

The pelican perked up a bit as soon as he caught sight of the fish. "Oh, that looks tasty," he said, eyeing the fish longingly. "I haven't been able to eat for days with this thing in my throat. Give anything to be able to swallow a fish like that right now."

Sunmoonstars jerked the fish away from the pelican and held it in his lap protectively.

"Sunmoonstars!" Noodle said to him in exasperation. "It's only one fish. And Pelican needs it. He just aid he hasn't eaten in days! Give it here." She held out her hand expectantly.

Sunmoonstars hesitated for a moment, then pitched the fish in her general direction. It missed her hand by a mile and landed on her right foot with a plop! Noodle shot him a reproachful look, but he had turned his back on her and was looking out at the sea. Rather intently.

She rolled her eyes at him anyway and picked up the fish. "Here," she said, holding it out to the pelican. "Consider it a complimentary breakfast from the two of us."

The pelican shook his head. "I told you, I can't swallow anything. That lump of metal keeps getting in the way."

"Well, you can't just sit there and starve to death," said Noodle. "Will you at least try and eat it? It's a pretty small fish….maybe it can get past the obstruction."

"All right," the pelican. "Throw it in." He held his beak open and waited.

Noodle tossed the fish into the bird's mouth. The pelican snapped his beak shut and tipped his head back. He made as if to swallow the fish, paused, shook his beak a bit as if trying to reposition the fish, tipped his head back again, hesitated…and swallowed.

"Hey, it worked!" the pelican said with delight. "Went down nice and easy! I think it…" His voice trailed off, and his face scrunched up a bit, as though he were suddenly in pain.

"Are…are you okay?" Noodle asked him apprehensively.

His response was a massive belch, one that put her performance at breakfast to shame. And as he did so, a silver wrench flew out of his beak and landed on Sunmoonstars's bare foot.

The creature's hiss of pain sounded like water hitting a hot skillet. He leapt from his spot on the washing machine and started hopping around on one foot. A moment later, Noodle heard a clank of metal from beneath his foot as some trash must have shifted…and down he went.

Noodle clapped both hands over her mouth to try and smother her laughter as he fell over with a clatter. "Oh dear…" she snickered. She considered going to him and seeing if he was all right, but suspected that that might be a good way to lose an eye.

The pelican, in the meantime, had waddled up next to her. "That grub sorted me right out," he told her, his eyes looking much brighter and more alert than they had been earlier. "I can't thank you enough Miss Noodle!" He opened and closed his beak several times and then shook his head, as if marveling at how much lighter his beak felt now that the wrench was gone. "Oh, it feels nice not to have that lump of metal in there anymore! No more coughing! And I think I could eat without any trouble now too. I don't suppose you have any more of those fish, do you Mr. Reaper?" This last sentence was directed at Sunmoonstars, who had finally gotten to his feet and was now looming over the both of them.

Sunmoonstars's reply was a vicious kick that the pelican just barely managed to avoid. The bird squawked in surprise and tried to fly away, but lacked the strength to get off the ground and broke into a waddling run instead. Sunmoonstars lunged after him, and pelican darted around the other side of the washing machine. The masked monster followed and the two of them were soon running in circles around the overturned machine, looking like something out of a Loony Tunes short.

"KNOCK IT OFF!" Noodle shouted at the both of them.

Sunmoonstars skidded to a halt, giving her a sharp, pointed look that she could only interpret as a glare. The pelican, however, kept on running and had soon circled back around the other side of the washing machine, where he ran head on into the now stationary Sunmoonstars's legs. He flipped over onto his back with a loud "OOF!"

Noodle darted over and snatched the pelican into her arms before Sunmoonstars could kick him again. "Time out, time out!" she said frantically, trying to keep the pelican out of the furious demon's reach.

"I must say, if the three of you are trying to break me out of my depression with an impromptu comedy act, you're not doing a very good job," came the seagull's voice. Noodle looked up in surprise to see that he had flown down to join them and was now perched on the handle of a rusted lawnmower. He yawned again. "I've seen better."

"No you haven't, Seagull," said the pelican. "You've never been off this island."

The gull sighed. "I don't suppose you could stick that spanner back in his throat for me?" he asked Noodle.

"Now Seagull..." the pelican began.

"Uh, why don't I take you back to our shelter rand give you some more fish to eat?" Noodle interrupted. "We've got plenty, and the sooner you get some food in you, the sooner you'll get your strength back."

"Oh, that sounds nice," said the pelican. "Lead the way, Miss Noodle."

"Do you want to come too?" Noodle asked the seagull.

"I'd like to think I have better things to do," the gull replied. He sighed again. "Like to think anyway."

"Suit yourself," Noodle told him. Then she turned to Sunmoonstars, who was sitting on the washing machine again. "And as for you, Grumpy," she said, not without affection. "You are excused. You might want to go work off some of that aggression by catching us some lunch for later. Although I think maybe we should stick to seafood for the rest of our time here," she added, thinking of the seagull's late uncle. She could only keep her fingers crossed and hope that they wouldn't run into a talking fish before they got off this island.

Sunmoonstars sighed in exasperation, but he nodded. He started to get up, but Noodle reached out and caught him by the nose. "Oh, and thank you for sacrificing that fish you caught for Pelican," she told him, batting her eyelashes at him. "It was very sweet." She gave him a chaste little kiss on the tip of his nose.

He hesitated for a long moment, then reached up and delicately brushed a hair out of her face with the tip of one long claw. Then he lowered his hand and gave the pelican a halfhearted pat on the head. Seemingly satisfied that peace had been made between the three of them, he got up and started limping toward the beach.

Well, that takes care of him, anyway… Noodle thought as she watched him go. She adjusted her grip on the pelican so that he was easier to carry, stooped down and grabbed the wrench, and then turned and started up the hill, nodding to the bored looking seagull as she passed him.

"What kinds of fish do you have at your shelter?" the pelican asked her as they walked.

"Oh…uh…lots of kinds," Noodle told him, not really wanting to admit that she didn't know a codfish from a goldfish. "Big ones, little ones, shiny ones…uh….not so shiny ones."

"Sounds delicious!" said the pelican. "I'll have one of each!"

"Well, don't eat too many," Noodle told him with a laugh. "Those are our supplies for when we're out at sea. And we'll definitely be leaving sooner, rather than later, thanks to you."

"Thanks to me?" the pelican asked her.

"Yes, thanks to you," Noodle replied. She held up the wrench. "This 'lump of metal' that you coughed up was just what I needed to get the boat finished today. If all goes well, we should be ready to sail first thing tomorrow!"





 
 
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