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My place too feel free

	L.M.W.
	L.M.W.


Last night I couldn't get to sleep, I kept remembering a girl, who I use to talk to her. I knew her full name, she use to be my best friend. Even though I only knew her online. Her Intials were LMW and I haven't hurt from her in two years. Two years ago on Chirstmas I called her. Just to see how she was doing. do you know what she told me? " Hi.. I'm doing fine. Now I would like for you to delete my number, never call me again, you ruined my life." That was what she said. and as I laid in bed, I relized jsut how many lives I have actually ruined, have many people have rotted by my hands. Steph: Even if you don't feel like I have, I feel like I have. I forced a love on you, I made you have to keep scrects from your mom. I'm a horrible person for this and I know I ruined your life. I remember how we met, though Jenny, because I really wanted to talk to you.... I'm sorry Miko: I can't give you enough attention, and I probably never will be able too. You have a hard time finding friends, and I'm sorry you found me. I wish I wouldnt have ruined your life the way I did, and maybe you'd still be a little happy. We Met, Because we both obsessed over Kakashi in a thread... I'm sorry Katie: You love me, and all I do is tease you, because I'm already with someone, and it kills me inside that you had to go though all of this pain and suffering, just to go though more knowing you can only watch me from afar. Met though my friend Kaylynn... I'm sorry Amanda/Ray: I feel like I've abandoned you the most, because you use to be such a great friend of mine, and now I dont' even call you, I rarely do, I use to hang out with you so much and now, now I feel dont' even feel like I know you anymore. We met at a school dance, and you were into YuYuHakusho, You had Hiei written on your hand and I came over and you said "ask me to tell you anything about Hiei" and when I asked you told me that he was dropped on off a cliff when he was little. Over the years I have been ruining peoples lives left and right, and I mostly have felt only love for these people, but in truth I sometimes don't even care how they feel, I push them around and I just don't understand what you people like about me, theres nothing to like, nothing that anyone should care for. and yet everyone does. because.... Everyone just Looooves Savvi..... Savvi · Tue Jun 27, 2006 @ 11:23pm · 4 Comments


Savvi Community Member «Prev \| Next» Archive \| Home [01/29/09 04:42am] [12/17/08 11:44am] [08/12/08 03:23pm] [07/12/08 05:32am] [07/12/08 05:11am] [07/04/08 01:36pm] [04/13/08 10:48am] [03/31/08 09:27am] [03/26/08 12:20am] [01/25/08 08:01am]

	User Comments: [4]
	User Comments: [4]


	Savvi, you haven't ruined anyone's life, I don't see how you could have ruined LMW's life, and you haven't abandoned Amanda because you still go and visit her every now and then to see how she's doing, you give LeeAnn as much attention as any friend should, I honestly think that Katie enjoys your teasing and your sympathy or else she wouldn't continue to hang around you, and as for me I couldn't be happier because of you. I do feel bad about keeping secrets from my mom and one day, I'll build up enough courage to tell her, I know I will, but it's my own decision to keep it a secret so that's not your fault it's my choice. And I don't believe that love is something that you can force. The only thing you did was slap me out of a denial that I would have had to face sooner or later anyway. I told you that I first started having feelings for you way back at the conventiion when I got to protect you from the fan girls and you protected me from the old guy perverts. (( Now that I think of it how come you got a swab of pretty fan girls and I got 2 old guys with braided hair and a decapitated plasic limb drapped from one of their necks ^^' )) That was before you started sleeping in the same bed as me and I remember how much safer and comfortable I slept in the same bed with you at the motel. You may not have noticed and I may not have noticed at the time, but thinking back on it, I was flirting with you in the pool and the hott tub and then I did it again at the dance. When I flirt it's not as obvious as when you flirt because I'm not bold enough to do the types of things you do. I flirt with my body. I wear revealing clothing and I move as gracefulling and sexily as I can. I use a different voice so that I'm careful not to sound too deep, or too childish. I make my voice smooth and light and delicate, yet audably loud. I was trying to swim and dance that way. I was trying to be impulsive and showy. Then I put on that dress on and everything because I wanted to look pretty for you and it made me really happy because it was the first time that you ever called me cute, and even though I denied it, I loved the way you called me cute. I fell for you then with out either of us noticing and because I didn't relize or didn't want to relize that I liked you, I teased you with role play. I loved when you touched me and I loved touching you back, but I told myself that it was only Yusuke having those feelings, if anything it's my fault that you couldn't stand waiting for my denial to pass. It's complicated for you to understand, and I'm not the best at explaining things, but I promise that I would have been miserable if I didn't meet you and I spent the rest of my life drawing pictures in my room. Pictures that no one would understand or care to see, and eventually I would run out of insiration and then I wouldn't even have drawing to keep me happy. I'd sit out on my pourch and put lotion on my exposed legs hoping that someone would notice me, or I would walk around town looking for friends like I used to when I was little, but unlike when I was little, even if I saw someone I wanted to talk to, I wouldn't have the nerve to approach them, therefore I would simply pass by and wish I wasn't such a coward. If I would have still met you yet you not have kissed me, I would have eventually relized myself that I indeed did have feelings for you, but never would I have ever built up the courage to tell you, and I would have been miserable because I still would have keep my feelings secret from my mom, but also secret from you and I would have died from the stress of keeping it all bottled up. Because I can keep things bottled up forever. So you really don't have to appologize unless your sorry for saving me from living a life that felt like I was still asleep all the time. I won't forgive you, because instead I'll thank you. Thank you. Offline HanaJaganshi · Community Member · Wed Jun 28, 2006 @ 12:24am


	savvi hunny? i know how your feel.. i dont really see why anyone wants to be my firned i dont think im fun or nice i think im a totaly b*h actually... i can never do anything right and i feel like i have failed you as a friend.. you were ncie enough to bring me into your life and i demand more from you... thats not right at all... its so rude of me to do something like that you are always ncie to me and i take that for granit and i regret doing that... im really sorry savvi... you didnt ruin my life... my life was ruined by myself Offline Bubbly La** · Community Member · Wed Jun 28, 2006 @ 12:28am


	Savvi, dont say that.... your a really nice person, and a great friend! ^^ Offline Psychotic_Idiot · Community Member · Wed Jun 28, 2006 @ 02:37am


	Savvi......you havn't ruined my life.....to tell you the trueth....I would be even more depressed than I was. because of you, I laugh. Because of you, I am happy. I don't know where I'd be if I hadn't met you, yet somehow.....I know I wouldn't be nearly as happy as I am now, now that I've met you, my most cherished and beloved friend........and I don't beleive anyone meets on accident. I was destined to find you as you were to find me.So, beleive all the pish-posh and rubbish you want, That's how I see things and that's how I'll always see things. If we weren't destined to be friends, you wouldn't have remembered the first thing I ever said to you three and a half years ago, and I should be the one apologizing to you for not keeping in touch when it was completely possible. I apologize to steph as well....I've never really been the one to socialize, but all of that changed when I met you. You made me feel good about myself and you're sooo encouraging, though you may not relize it. you helped me be a better person and it tore me up inside to see you move away. more than you know, and that's somthing I had never cared for until you came along. That proves what a special bond we have. And That's something I only share and feel for deeply true friends that I keep close to my heart. You haven't ruined my life. You are the main factor that binds my heart together. That's the trueth.....I love you, Savvi! I really do!....I just hope you read this so you know how I feel 'cause I'm sure as hell not gunna tell you anything like this in person. It would be just too damned embarassing! Offline ~Tears of Darkness~666 · Community Member · Sat Jul 08, 2006 @ 02:32am

	User Comments: [4]
	User Comments: [4]

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