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A rather disguisting story about Emmy, my kitten. |
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((This is quoted directly from The Green Dragon, in the Lord of the Rings subforum, so if you've already read it there you don't need to bother here.))
I have a story for you all.
It's a might gross, just to warn you.
I've recently moved the litter box for my two cats out onto my back patio. Now, my apartment complex has a strict policy on not allowing animals on the back patio unattended, so I went through great efforts to keep the litter box hidden. I bought a bunch of plants, and a nice piece of plywood (Also decorated) to keep the cats from jumping onto the complex's terrace and escaping.
Somehow, though, my kitten has found a way out anyway. Since she's still half feral, I can't catch her. I've tried blocking the entrance to the terrace-everything.
We have a cat door that my older cat's figured out, but somehow, my kitten hasn't, so she never uses it. Well, last night we had the door closed, so she couldn't wander onto the patio freely. We'd figured it'd be okay since she'd spent most of the day outside.
But, alas, this morning, just as Zach was running out the door, five minutes late, she goes and craps in the corner, right on the carpet by the sofa. My dearest husband tells me, "I'd clean it up myself but I have to go to work." >___<
So, I'm stuck here, with an orange, very smelly, borderline diarreah cat present. Furious, I run after the kitten, who somehow has learned the fine art of using the cat door on the back patio. This makes me even more mad because I discover that she's just been toying with me this whole time.
Anyway, I discover the kitten, bottom feet on a potted plant, top feet on the railing of the patio, and head already out on the terrace towards freedom. That's solved two mysteries. How she gets out, and how the plants keep getting broken. So, I grab the kitten, by the scruf of her neck. She screams loud enough to wake up half the apartment complex, and I realize that her head is stuck.
So here I am, with a kitten dangling over 10 feet of air, head stuck, and clawing at me with what feels like a chainsaw. I somehow manage to get her head free, and there was a moment when I thought I'd lose her, because she started squirming in my grip, clawing with her back paws, still dangling over the edge.
Well, I manage to pull her up. I beat the living s**t out of her. I move the planter that was allowing her to escape. I go to wash the blood off my hands and arms, and put bandages on the worst of them...and then I realized that I still hadn't cleaned up the crap in the living room.
********.
Tenativly, I go to face the crap, armed with toilet paper (Fresh out of paper towels) and a plastic baggy. I get down there to look at it, when I notice that about half the s**t is red. It's bloody.
Panicked, I call Zach, who is still on his way to work. He tells me not to worry about it, it was probably something she ate...
Boy was he right.
I go back to face the crap, and I almost pick it up, when I realize that one part curles up, much akin to what a mouse tail would do. With a sickening feeling, I follow the tail-like strand upwards, to realize that the bloody bit is right around where a mouse stomache would be. I follow it further...
And there, burried in pungent orange dressing, which looks like that slime stuff that Nickelodion game shows used to dump all over contestants...
Was a cute little mouse head.
Black eyes and all.
I don't know how I noticed it before, but there it was, burried in the pile of crap.
Now, I don't know about you guys...but I'm not picking that up. It was too late to call Zach back, but I text messaged him with this.
"It's a partially digested mouse. It's all yours."
It'll sit there until this afternoon.
 Elainya · Mon Mar 20, 2006 @ 01:59pm · 5 Comments |
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