"hi!"
"heyy!"
"so...how are you feeling today?"
"uhm, just...normal. okay i guess."
"is that so?"
"absolutely! 3nodding "
"great."
"great."
"yeah..."
"so...what about you?"
"yeah, i'm good."
"yeah, that's good."
"okay...bye."
"uhm...bye..."
all the while i'm screaming CAN YOU HEAR ME? inside my own head.
insignificantunimportantunwantedforgettableishowireallyfeel
CANYOUHEARMEcanyousaveme?
can you tell me i'm not as small as i feel inside?
now i understand...the only way for you to get rid of me...was by shattering me in the cruelest way possible. because i was already so used to having my heart broken by you, you had to do something with more BAM! right? well...good job...i've been got rid of very effectively...but it's unfair how i had to pay the price. it's unfair how easy you have it.
nononononono i'm not supposed to be thinking these things. the last thing i want to do is to sink back into pathetic self-pity. yet here i am. for the millionth time. spinning round in circles.
i was told yesterday by a close friend that i have the face and attitude of a heartbreaker. i laugh it off and grin. inside the smallest part of me scoffs at the irony of the statement. heartbreaker and heartbroken. you've got the roles mixed up.
is anyone really LISTENING? can somebody really SAVE ME?
ZOMG.
sigh...end rant.
i am tired. of like, everything. but it's just a passing feeling, i'm sure.
 kayjenno · Sat Nov 14, 2009 @ 03:48pm · 1 Comments |
