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xxBloodRunsCold Quote: "The Jonas Brothers (also known The Jonassholes, BangBros, HoBros, JoHoes, the JoBros, The Gaynas Brothers, The Jewness Brothers) is a gay boy band made up of Nick, Joe, and Kevin Jonas. Coincidentally, the band name can be shortened to JB. They brainwash their impressionable fans into worshiping them by pretending to be polite, gentlemanly Christians who have parents and feelings. They are universally praised for utilizing a wide array of instruments to showcase their diverse musical talents. Some argue they are the second coming of The Beatles. Some even say they are Classic Rock, which goes to show how delusional today's generation are. What these idiotic victims of the American media don't realize is that this is just how they're marketed. Didn't you see Camp rock? They have no real talent whatsoever, which is shown when they hit random drums, strum random power chords, and sing like whiny three-year-old girls getting bananas shoved up their asses. They piss away the best years of their lives producing music that is so sugary-sweet, it gave front man Nick Jonas Type 1 Diabetes. These faggots don't even take advantage of the masses and masses of loli p***y at their disposal (only due to the fact Nick and Kevin are together and Joe's completely hot for Zac Efron). Their existence only proves that Disney is now run by a bunch of *****] Quote: " Kevin "Not The Cute One" Jonas Commonly known as the Ugly One, the Gay One, the Other One, among other charming nicknames. and not without reason. Just look at that ******** face. However, he appears to have a pretty large d**k. This would make up for his eye-blindingly bad looks normally, but Kevin has sworn virginity until marriage, making his huge d**k completely useless. But look at that ******** face. On a second thought, no one would f**k that beast. Kevin is well-known for wearing high-heeled boots, patterned shirts, and tight white jeans. If only his mother had known – she would have aborted him, and we wouldn't have to see this abomination of a man. Kevin is also the oldest Jonas Brother, and at 20-years-old, that makes him completely unappealing to the entire fanbase, which consists of screaming 12-year-olds. He was named 20 out of 100 on a list of the unsexiest men. He was higher on the list than Chris Crocker and Michael Jackson - srsly. We'll end this section here, because everyone knows that nobody cares about Kevin Jonas." Quote: Joe JonasThe Pretty One, the Hot One, the Straight-Haired One. No matter how many times you compliment this one on his looks, one fact remains: Joe Jonas stopped developing mentally at the age of 5. Thankfully, he got his older brother Kevin to do his homework for him through high school, in return giving him a daily blow job before bed. He is also a flaming homosexual with no vocal talent. Quote: Nick JonasNick Jonas is the youngest loser of the Jonas Brothers. He whines and cries over his "tough" life of being rich famous, and having a gold necklace that officially states he has diabeetus. He whacks off onto a bible and Jesus action figure every night before going to bed. (I'm prolly gonna be dead just for writing that since he loves God so much lulz amirite?!) He also has a shitty afro and sings songs about his diabeetus, and brings it up every five minutes in an interview. Typical Interview ED: Nick, what is your favorite color? Nick: Gray, it's the color of diabetes awareness! ED: Interesting. Are you a pitcher or a catcher? Nick: I'm a catcher. ED: You give good head? Nick: Just ask Joe!
 getty6000 · Tue Jan 20, 2009 @ 12:39am · 0 Comments |
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