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I thought I knew what you meant,
I thought I knew you well enough,
I thought I was close enough for you to love me,
But maybe I'm too young to understand.
I thought I might be different,
I thought you didn't compare me to her,
I thought you were with me because I was ME,
But I guess I'm too young to understand.
I thought I could always comfort you,
I thought you'd hold me if I was sad,
I thought you'd be sensible when I couldn't be,
But I'm just too young to understand.
I thought you'd be there for me,
If I could be there in return,
And I thought you'd laugh and joke with me,
But I'm too young to ever understand.
I thought that she was simply her,
And you were simply you,
And I was simply me and that was good enough,
But I'm far too young to understand.
I thought you loved me for me.
I thought you loved her for her.
Well, you did love her for her.
I guess I'm still too young to understand.
When you were with me, were you thinking of her?
I guess you were, why would you think of me?
It's not like I matter to you enough for you to say
That I'm not too young to understand.
You always would say that I'm stupid,
That I'm naive and childish and dumb,
And I would always say that I'm old enough to know,
That I was not too young to understand.
Well, I guess it's clear that I'm wrong,
That I was naive and childish and dumb,
Because I always thought you were close to me,
But I'm just too young to understand.
I thought that maybe you loved me,
That maybe, you sometimes thought only of me,
That maybe, you never compared me to her,
But then I read it. That was when I understood.
That day, you tried to show to me
That I didn't understand,
And I ignored the warning. I ignored the red light,
Flashing at me, screaming for me to escape.
I was too young to understand.
But now, you told me, in the simplest way,
And I realized I understand.
All this time, all this time, you were thinking of her,
And never once of me.
But you told me, and for the first time, I think I understand.
I'm no longer stupid, naive, childish, and dumb.
Now I get it. Now I understand.
When you were with me, you closed your eyes
And pretended to be with her.
Even though you knew you never could be.
So instead, you pretended I was her.
I was the substitute in your precious fantasy.
Well, that day I took a leap.
Like a birthday, one giant step,
I suddenly was older.
I was finally no longer too young to understand what you did.
But although I know what you did,
I'm too young to understand why.
 FN Pixie · Sun Dec 07, 2008 @ 11:58pm · 1 Comments |
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