...and I'm here in Youngstown, Ohio...unable to sleep.
Honestly...I'm going through one of the hardest times in my life. A perfect Christmas followed by these events:
1. We put Jasmine to sleep the day after Christmas.
2. Later that same night, we receive the dreaded call from my Uncle Joe saying that my Papou (grandfather) passed away.
3. December 29 - flew in to Ohio.
4. December 30 - received a call that my Uncle Nick (my Papou's cousin) died.
5. December 30 - THAT time of the month.
I don't even know what to do anymore. I'm really confused and lost. So much anger is building inside of me, and I'm frustrated with myself for being angry over nothing. I miss my cats and I want to go home. It's difficult knowing that Jasmine won't be there with Puppy and Kikyou to greet us when we come home from Ohio and yell at us for being gone like she used to. I think that Jasmine's death has affected me the most. She was my best friend in the entire world. She never left my side. I miss her companionship terribly.
I can't believe I haven't gone a single day yet without crying. God, do I feel pathetic.
I'm worried about so many things. Everything is just weighing on my shoulders. I feel like I'm dragging bricks of lead behind me. But I suppose that with as far life has gone down as of right now, there's nowhere else to go but up.
I know that everything will be okay in the end; it's just the transition that's hard to deal with.
With that, I'm going to try and get some sleep.
 Chibi Pierceye · Mon Dec 31, 2007 @ 07:46am · 0 Comments |
