Today has been like totally anoying and boreing!
Brian couldn't come over because his mom went to work.
And he couldn't come over yesterday because he woke up to late.
Anyways,
I hope that he can come over tomoro.
But this week has been like totally crazy.
Gymnastics started and I have been like totally worn out from it like all week.
But Kyra is doing it with me.
Anyways,
So my birthday is in like a week,
And everyone keeps asking me what I want.
I want to answer,
but I don't think that I could.
How can I tell some one what I really want for my birthday.
I mean sure,
I kind of have Brian I guess,
But I do know that there's something that is holding him back,
I know that he's not letting me all the way in.
But I mean that would be really cool for my birthday,
for him to let me in.
But that's not what I really want.
What I really want for my birthday,
I just want all the stupid fighting and yelling and screaming to just stop.
For one night,
I just want my mom and dad to stop fighting and accept everything and just get along with my grandma.
And I want my aunt gone and my cousin to just accept the fact that I like Brian.
But mostly,
I want my family to just leave me alone and stop hasteling me about everything.
I mean how on earth could I ever tell them that?
Anyways,
I really want to trust Brian.
I trust him more than I trust anyone.
But that doesn't really mean that I fully trust him.
I mean I want to....
Honestly I do,
But everyone says that he says stuff about me at school that he doesn't tell me.
Destiny and Carthella and Penny and Lizzy all say that he says things that makes them think that he doesn't really like me.
And I mean the fact that after like a month,
he still hasn't asked me out....
And the fact that he keeps coming up with ways not to hang out with me....
Yea it's kind of suspitious,
But I mean should I really just give up?
I can tell that there is something there....
It's obvious,
But I'm starting to think that he's turning out just like all of the other guys that I've dated....
Maybe he's the same and just likes me because he thinks that I'm hot.
And I mean,
that's all he's really said to me.
I'm sexy,
I'm hot,
He doesn't really seem to want to get intemate and really like me,
or at least right now that's how it seems.
And I don't like it.
I'm gonna wait thing out for two weeks....
If things don't change by the first of December,
then I'll listen to everyone.
But until then,
I'm gonna listen to my heart,
And right now it is naive and says that he just wants to do this the right way.
I hope.....
PlatnumBayb92 Community Member 
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