| Why doesn't it rhyme much? |
| It's not that kind of poem. |
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[ 18 ] |
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| Total Votes : 18 |
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 Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:12 am
I wrote a poem to pass the time. It came out as this. I think this could possibly be how Ken Felt when he was still evil.
In a sea of happiness,
why is it that everyone seems to smile?
Am I imagining these peoples sadness,
or will I wake up in a white room tommorow.
No, I think their really sad but I don't understand,
how can they smile?
Truth be told,
it scares me to look at these people when they can't even cry,
they won't shed a tear.
they've each lost something dear and yet...
Not one drop of precipatation from their faces,
just twisted smiles that I can't understand yet still see through.
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Posted: Thu Jun 14, 2007 12:00 am
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Posted: Fri Jun 22, 2007 11:28 am
wow,that ws definetly unique
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Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2007 4:09 pm
It's strange that you see a world of happiness, and I see a world of emptyness. But I guess everyone sees the world differently.
Awesome poem by the way. It's very good, gives me goosebumps. You paint a beautiful picture with your words.
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Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2007 8:09 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 1:46 pm
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Posted: Sat Aug 04, 2007 7:06 pm
I like the line "or will I wake up in the white room tomorrow?"
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Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 10:49 am
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Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 4:28 pm
Wow, thanks for the wonderful comments. mrgreen
Anyway, after actually being away from my computer for a while, I noticed it even more than before! Again, thanks for the comments!
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Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 10:08 pm
I've written another poem pertaining to false smiles. I don't think it's as good as my first.
These smiles are growing,
their becoming infective!
Why is false cheer,
always this aggressive?
Fear not my sorrowed heart,
for I know my sorrow lives within you.
Yet, my heart has only fake smiles,
to tell it's sorrow to.
Do they really understand?
I can't tell by their smiles,
I don't know if I want to though,
because sorrow grows to anger,
anger grows to rage,
rage grows to something un-named.
Then it turns into,
that dredded fale smile.
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Posted: Mon Oct 22, 2007 12:27 pm
Wow these are very good biggrin
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Posted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 10:03 am
Awesome... totally awesome
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Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 6:46 pm
they're a good start. they have a unique, quiet flare. the wording, or word choice could use some working on. word choice can enhance or repress the power of your poems.
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Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2007 9:56 am
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Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2007 12:04 pm
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