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| Why do parents hate yaoi |
| They aren't used to it. |
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20% |
[ 12 ] |
| They were exposed to homophobism in childhood. |
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35% |
[ 21 ] |
| They're embarressed that people might find out. |
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3% |
[ 2 ] |
| They're stupid. |
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18% |
[ 11 ] |
| POLL WHORE. RAPE THIS OPTION. |
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23% |
[ 14 ] |
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| Total Votes : 60 |
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 Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 9:30 am
okay, heres the deal. we're discussing how parents accept yaoi, and which parents accept it the easiest.
Some parents accept their children liking yaoi, or possibly being gay/bi. Some parents, however, DON'T. Why is this? Read further.
I believe that how accepting a parent is is related to:
A. How they were raised.
B. Their marital status.
C. Which child it is. (1st, 2nd, etc.)
D. The gender of the child.
E. Their age. (parent's)
F. Their psycological makeup.
The parents of children today grew up in an era that is very different from the one that we live in now, which was very sheltered and strict on the tolerance of those "different" from the norm. Children growing up in this time period most likely never used drugs, (depends how old the parent is), regarded anything stronger than "darn" as a swear word, and ostracised children who didn't go to church every sunday, "like good little girls and boys". After about 30 years of age, it becomes hard for these adults to accept changes in the values of society as a whole, and they reject these ideas utterly and try to keep their children "pure" from tainted morals. Parents like these are not necessarily wrong in raising their kid, they're just outdated or living slightly in the past. However, if a parent is younger, the chances are good he or she will be open to new things.
The marital status of a parent also plays a deciding role. Single parents who have had to raise children tend to be much more open to "differences" in their child's psycological and physical makeup, while married parents can be much stricter. This is because single parents have nobody to pass the child off to when they encounter something they cant handle. Single parents have to keep going with the flow, and quickly learn to accept whatever comes their way. Married parents have somebody to turn to for support when disciplining their child, and someone to pass said child off to when they cannot handle the problem at hand. These parents learn that it is okay to reject differences in their children, because their partner will be there to stomp it out.
As we all know, parents are stricter with their first child than with the second or third. This is partly because they have never raised a child before and don't want to screw it up, but also because they don't know if they'll have another chance to have grandchildren, or another chance to raise a child. They want to get the most out of their first child, but they feel they already have firgured everything out an can relax by their second child.
more soon, but I'm getting kicked off the comp.
please discuss:
arrow What type of parents are okay with yaoi.
talk2hand Why certain types of parents might not accept yaoi.
idea How to deal with unaccepting parents.
domokun Is there a way to make them accept it or let you watch it?
exclaim Do single parents accept yaoi easier than married parents, and why.
okie? great.
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Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:11 pm
Regarding the poll above, I went with the "They're stupid" choice, because with my parents, that's the case. They say they're ok with homosexuality, know that many of my friends are gay and even some in their workplaces. But the second they see something about gay marriage or other controvertial gay topics, they are completly against it.
To think that I, their beloved daughter, would even think about reading/watching two men together is beyond their little minds. So, my parents don't even know about my shonen-ai/yaoi obsession, because I know they would hate me forever. And ever. crying
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Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:09 pm
My mom would have a problem with it. (That's why Im never gonna tell her) Not because she's against homosexuality, but because she just doesn't think I should be looking at/reading anything that has to do with sex/relationships and junk. Also, she is sorta stupid, because she can accept other people being bi or gay, but not her precious daughter! mad
It just... makes me mad. And my dad, he would freak out. He's super homophobic. (just the way he was raised, I guess) He doesn't mind gays so much, as long as they're not by him. rolleyes
I dont know... my mom might accept it if I told her, but Im not taking that risk.
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Posted: Fri Apr 14, 2006 9:09 pm
My parents are obsesed with the whole Cgristain point of view so since the bible said it's "Wrong" then they think it's wrong. They're so closed minded and increadibly stupid. They know I have friends who are gay but they don't even approve of that. Like I said, SO STUPID!
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Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 3:42 pm
They're Christain and think it's wrong. They're not homophobis, but they don't approve or it. I don't think that's stupid of them. But oh well.
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Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 7:56 pm
Well, personally, my parents are fine with it. Of course they are affected, I think, mostly by the way they were raised.
Although both of my parents grew up in virtually un-loving households, they feel like they must do the best for both me and my sister. One of my mother's siblings, my uncle, is gay himself, and she grew up taking care of him. I think that both of my parents were so enraged by their situations growing up, that they wanted to be accepting and loving parents.
I'm glad that my parents are accepting of most everything I believe in and do. I'm pretty lucky that they are so open to things. I think parents that are open to whatever their child may like will accept their children having an interest in yaoi and shonen-ai. Closed minded parents, or people, that are stubborn and unwilling to bend for anyone, probably will not. The type of parent that expects their child to be just like them and follow in their footsteps, live up to their dreams they never succeeded, will not.
In my opinion, the best way to deal with unaccepting parents is to either keep your interest to yourself or just out right tell them. Even if they block off all connections to it, ground you, whatever, I think taking a stand for oneself is the best thing to do. They may accept it eventually, but they might not. Anyway, they aren't you and in the long run, they don't control you or your life.
I also think it's okay to have your own opinions and expectations, as long as you let others have their own, different opinions. =3
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Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 2:11 pm
You want to know the way to solve the whole problem of your parents banning you from yaoi?
Don't tell them -_-;;
Why the hell do people feel the need to run up to their parents with "Rawr! I like watching two men have buttsecks!!!!1!!" It's stupid.
And it's not like you have to hide your Yaoi. I have all of my Manga/Doujinshi sitting up on a bookshelf. And to an extent, they probably know I like Yaoi, But I'm not shoving it in their faces. So yeah, it's simple...
Just don't tell your parents -_-;
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Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 5:57 pm
I voted "because they're not used to it." My mum was saying the other day that she doesn't know how lenient to be with me and my brother a lot of the time 'cos the world's changed so much. I mean when most of our parents were our age they just didn't have the access to the type of information we do, and the world was a way more racist, sexist, homophobic, etc place.
You can't just forget a lifetime of socialisation into the mindset that children need to be protected from homosexuality (here in Britain we had government legislation to that effect, "section 28"). I think that's why the majority of parents have problems with it, the idea that it's warping our still developing minds! *cue evil music*
My parents find it hard to comprehend the attraction of yaoi, but they're fine with me reading/writing/watching/drawing it. I guess it's better than drugs... Lol.
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Posted: Fri May 05, 2006 10:08 pm
Its stupidity. Most people around me, they hate gays but they can never give an intelligent reson why. Blind hate. Stupid people.I'm glad i dont live with my mom anymore. She was a single parent and completely closed minded.
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 7:42 pm
I've told my mom that I'm bi. She said it was fine with her but she acts like it's not.
My dad, well, he'll never know unless she tells him. Stupid homophobic b*****d. :3
I hid emy yaoi cuz da parents don't like it. my more explicit ones I catually lift up one of my bookshelves and put it underneath it, cuz it's plastic and I can XD
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 9:10 pm
As I have many friends who like yaoi, I know the various different types of parental reactions...
Gender is definetly an issue. If you're a girl and tell them this, they probably think you are just kinky. If a guy tells them this, then they think they're gay (although, with a couple of my friends, this is not the case).
My parents don't really give a rat's a** what I do, watch, or read, and haven't since I was 2 years old... so I suppose the term for them is "As long as you don't get me involved, you can do whatever the hell you want..."
My friend Jess' parents are more like "MAN PORN!!111onewon!" because... well, the town we live in is about 64% homophobic.
Most of my other female friends got the basic reaction of "................" and then their parents ask if they are reading gay porn everytime they pick up a book, but they don't really seem to mind that much, it just creeps them out.
One of my friends has a gay uncle, so her parents are hip with it.
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Posted: Fri May 12, 2006 7:55 am
Overall, my mom is open to anything, even some one in her genertaion. She belives in free rights, wants gay marragie and everything, as long as they hurt someone, she don't care
and when it comes to yaoiness, she looks at the art and not the conspect
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Posted: Sat May 13, 2006 12:25 pm
I don't think that my parents would approve. They don't have anything major against homosexuals (though they are against gay marriage), but I think it's probably different to them for me to read about it or watch it. I'm just not going to tell them, it's safer that way. I think that alot of it comes from the way they were raised, though my grandparents are a lot more liberal about it than my parents sweatdrop
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Posted: Sat May 13, 2006 9:46 pm
My mom's fine with me wanting to watch two boys kiss as long as she doesn't have to see it. I guess that's a good thing, except for when I want to watch my uber not-for-mom's-eyes animes and the only medium I have to watch it is my computer, which is in her room. So it's like a catch-22 situation...
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Posted: Sun May 28, 2006 6:10 am
My parents are fine with it. ^^
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