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Hi Gaians ! Okay, maybe I look desperate but I'm not. I'm just curious and want to be cautious in what I do. For me , someone is desperate when he/she dates anyone she/he can find.

I just want to know if you tried online dating website and how was it.

From what I heard, some go there just to joke around, profile picture did not look like him at all, lied about their age, and some people really met the right person...Those people were the ones who convinced me to use online dating website.

I've been told to be careful online. It's easy for people to lie.

OKcupid is a big fail, looks like single people in my city do not register in this website there were only 6 people which one has a girl profile picture when I selected the option I am a woman looking for a man between 26-30. When I chose , the option monogamy relationship (which is really important to me), there's only 2 people that fits that criteria, I gave up at that point. They were not interesting at all. This lasted 15 minutes or even less.

Match.com had to pay 100$ for 3 month, non refundable, I got scammed. I hated the experience. I don't talk to people first but I did there, and the people were not nice. Anyway, I got annoyed that a man in his 40s found me attractive. He looked like my dad seriously I can't date a men that looks as old as my dad I just can't...




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Since I was 18, I was looking to be in a relationship, because I was told it is hard to find someone when you're older but at the same time my parents were divorcing. So, I had some negative thoughts about love and relationship. Anyways, I've heard many times that love finds you, unexpected blah blah blah. Well, I will turn 26 this year and still I haven't met anyone to be in a serious relationship. I know a relationship builds , so if I want to be in a relationship I have to at least met some people of the opposite gender and start to get to know them...

I can't really give you much info on dating websites, however I will say that you shouldn't spend your time actively seeking out a romantic relationship. You say that you don't want to look desperate, but that is being desperate.

Live your life and a relationship will happen when it happens. Don't limit yourself to people of a certain criteria (looks, age, etc) when you may find someone that is absolutely perfect for you that falls just outside the criteria that you have set for yourself.

There is no cap on finding a relationship. You can find one now or when you're 50, it doesn't matter. The point is to be happy with yourself and with your life and everything else will fall into place.

Everyone, no. A dating website is usually used when someone has no other means of meeting people or as a last resort. My point was that making finding a relationship a main focus in your life is desperate. Fulfill goals and live, relationships will fall into place.

I understand that, but you can't force it to happen sooner. If you force a relationship you're most likely going to end up either unhappy or a single parent, which I doubt is what you want. There is a slim chance that it would work out but it usually works best when things fall into place naturally.

I don't have experience with dating sites, so I can't really help with that.

Looking for a relationship definitely shouldn't be a main focus for you, but you can still put effort into it without exhausting yourself over it. It's about finding a good balance, that right amount of effort that isn't too over the top but isn't too uninterested. It's just best not to be hung up on it, it can take time no matter how much you look. Focusing on yourself can actually help with it as well. Growing and learning opens up chances for more bonds, being happy with yourself and where you are in life can attract a decent amount of people, believe it or not.

Turning to online dating doesn't make you desperate and it isn't a bad thing to do. As many failed stories you hear, there are many success stories as well. It's a completely legitimate path to take as long as you're careful and fully understand what you're getting into.

Relationships are complicated, love is complicated. I've met people who took years to finally get together, I've met people who knew each other for literally only a month before they got married and are still together for more than a decade. I've met people who were high school sweethearts and stayed together for the rest of their lives, and people who didn't find the love of their life until their 40's or older. Everyone is different, people change, sometimes things don't fall into place and other times they click automatically. You're still very young and have plenty of time to figure things out.

Regardless of all of that, online dating can't hurt to try as long as you keep yourself safe and do lots of research on the sites you intend to use. Sure, love can find you, but there is nothing wrong in looking for it yourself. Just try not to prioritize it above other things in your life, you might burn yourself out.