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Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 10:40 pm
Title: {no title as of yet...} Author: Stepinahalf Disclaimer: I do not own anything relating to or anything about fma. Series: Fullmetal alchemist Warnings: none really... Notes : not really...other than I'm a little lazy and it might take me a while to type up the entire fic... Chapter one I awoke staring into his beautiful sleeping face. I smiled as I ran my fingers through his ebony hair. I kissed him gently on the forehead before I wriggled out from under his arms and I walked into the bathroom. I stepped into the warm shower, letting the water trickle down my body, and over my metal limbs. I close my eyes and I feel arms wrap around me. I open my eyes and I gaze into his dark eyes. He smiles down at me,"how are you my little love?"I smile up at him and turn around,"I'm fine, now that I'm in your loving embrace..." said and laid my head on his wet chest. We stood in the water, holding each other for a long time until we heard a knock on the door,"BROTHER!!! Are you there?!" My eyes widened and I let go of him,"s**t!!! You have to hide!!" I hurried out of the shower and threw a towel at my secret lover," Hurry up and dry off..." I said and ran into the room. I put my clothes back on and throw him his clothes, get dressed an hop out the window..." I whispered, knowing my brother could hear me if i said it any louder. He nods and quickly puts on his clothes. I kissed him as he stepped out of the window, on the small ledge outside. I smile at him and I open the door,"what is it Al?" I asked my little brother, who ironically was taller than me. He walked into my room, making loud metal clanking noises as he walked,"You'll never believe it brother! Winry called." "It's not like it's rare that Winry calls Alphonse..." I said laughing a bit as I dried off my hair. "It's not that,"He said,"But she said that Dad was home." When I heard that my smile faded,"So...why would I care if that b*****d is home..." "But Ed..." "No Al!" I yelled, "He left us...and never came back...so now years later, he thinks we'll just forgive him and be a happy little family again?!" My armored brother sinks his head,"But brother...He's our father..." "Argh......alright Al, for you...we'll go see him, in a few days...I have to get things cleared up with Mustang first..." I glanced at the window and noticed my love was no longer sitting in the ledge but he was attempting to get back inside my room without being noticed. I started to shove Al out of my room,"So go call Winry and tell her that we'll be there in a few days, k, Al?" My brother nodded and started to leave,"Thank you brother." he said happily and left. I sighed and plopped back on my bed.
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Posted: Sat Mar 18, 2006 6:53 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 18, 2006 10:48 pm
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Posted: Sun Mar 19, 2006 1:31 pm
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Posted: Mon Mar 20, 2006 10:13 am
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Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 3:55 pm
i like it!! you are really good. 3nodding
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Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 12:49 pm
Chapter two's even better ^^ I'll type it up when I'm not so lazy. mrgreen
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Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 4:17 pm
AAWW!!!! heart whee 3nodding that was good ^^ continue on my fellow gaian ^^ ahahha royed^^
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Posted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 8:39 pm
It seemed sort of out of character at first, but hey love does that to you, and it was very sweet. I look forward to seeing more. ^o^
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Posted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 9:25 pm
ok, and now onto Chapter 2 "that was close..." I sighed as I walked to the window, "you need to stay out when I tell you to..." He smiled down at me, "Silly little boy, your brother wouldn't have found me..." "I'm not little! And you tried to get back in!" "Shh..." He smiled as he pet my long blond hair, "we don't want that little brother of yours to hear you..." I sighed and laid my head against his chest, "Yeah...You're right. Al can't know about us. Nobody can." I wrapped my arms around his waist. I smiled up at him, and he smiled back don at me "I have to start packing...knowing Al, he'll ant to go ASAP and 'Colonel Mustang' needs to know that I'm going to leave for a couple days. " We both laughed at the comment. "Although, he may already know..." I smirked at him, " don't you think you should be getting to work. Everyone is going to get suspicious on why every day you come in late. and they'll just pile up more paperwork for you to do." His eyes widened, "Yea...you're right...damn..." I let go of him and he hurried to the door. He quickly turned around and walked back to me, "I love you, Edward Elric." He smiled sweetly and bent down so we could share a long passionate kiss before he left. After he closed the door I glanced out the window behind me and on the ground in front of me, I saw my brother, his head turned upwards towards me. I heard him faintly say, "Bro-brother?" I gasped andquickly ran outside to him, only wearing my blue boxers. (I will finish later ^^)
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Posted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 10:59 pm
Wow, it's so good. By the way, nice cliff hanger. crying
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Posted: Sun Mar 26, 2006 5:53 am
It's very good! I heart Royed. Great point to leave the story at! Cliffhangers are lovely!
The only thing I can critique on is that you used current tense words, when the majority of the story was in past tense. Also, in the beginning, a lot of the sentences began with 'I'. Try to switch it up a bit. Also, a new paragraph for dialogue.
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Posted: Sun Mar 26, 2006 2:58 pm
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Posted: Sun Mar 26, 2006 4:03 pm
OMG!!!!! I love it!!!!! u should write more heart heart
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Posted: Sun Mar 26, 2006 7:19 pm
Keiikou It's very good! I heart Royed. Great point to leave the story at! Cliffhangers are lovely! The only thing I can critique on is that you used current tense words, when the majority of the story was in past tense. Also, in the beginning, a lot of the sentences began with 'I'. Try to switch it up a bit. Also, a new paragraph for dialogue. YAY! accual critisism! thank you. and I kno I sitch it up sometimes...It's like that on my handritten pages adn such and I just don't feel like fixing it. And I like just having it like that. Easier. ^^ and another thing, it's not really meant to be a cliffhanger, I just as up really late this morning adn I didn't ant my parents to ake up and come in seeing me on the computer, typinf yaoi none the less.
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