I know what i should do, but why cant i bring myself to..

[killizworth]

I've been with this guy on and off for two years now.. he has helped me through everything and has been there through the difficult times.. but he has also been the reason why i havent been myself lately..

Firstly, I am a single mother.. my daughter is almost 3 and i've always been independent.. doing things myself in order to give her what she needs..
I dont have her on weekends because that is when i would normally work double shifts. Her and I moved out..

Some how, he managed to move in with us within a month..

Recently (march) i was in a car accident with my boyfriend..He was able to go back to work.. i however, am not. My job has terminated me as well, and my tax returns that i was going to use on my teeth, i now have spent on rent and what was needed..

Since he has lived with us, he has only payed for groceries and whatever he wanted..now that he has to pay for rent and everything else.. things have gotten weird.. He makes more than i did in a week but complains..(i dont get it)

Slowly we have drifted apart, im not sure if its because of the accident or im starting to realize we dont work out for one another..

We dont go on dates, we cant hold a conversation without it ending in frustration.. he loves my daughter and i know that.. and he has done alot for us during this time.. but i can help but think he doesnt feel for me like he used too or i dont..

He will go to work, come home and complain about stuff i could care less about.. then naps or does his own thing..

i get it.. but when i worked i would come home , entertain and give my daughter all my time then cook and clean and give him all my time when she was in bed.

now im suppose to do everything and have no help or attention?

we dont kiss, cuddle or even sit beside each other on the couch...
dont have sex anymore or as often as we used to ( and i know that happens in relationship but come on.. once a month if that when it used to be atleast once a week to every other day..)

He only pleases himself, and hasnt actually gotten me off in 6 months.. wont go down there either, it is always on his time.. and it lasts 2 min..

i would try and be dominate but he yells at me and pushes me away with excuses..

I have no income or anything until the case is done and im starting to feel drained and unhappy.. he wont let me do things i enjoy (play games on my comp or talk to my web friends, go to the bar even with my own mother) without hearing it from him in a snarky, insecure judgmental way..

Things i enjoy like movies and music he bashes instead of accepting that i like diff things..

He is the same guy but not and to top it off he is six years older than i..

I know i should leave him, but we have been through alot and im hoping when this case is done things go back to how they were, but at the same time.. i hope they stay how they are.. so when i get my settlement i can just tell him to ******** off..

feels wrong.. as if im leading him on.. and dont get me wrong i do care for him.. but i cant seem to bring myself to say i love him really lately..

I have told him im unhappy and that im getting tired of this b.s .. he knows it and he knows i b***h and complain about what has gone on.. but he doesnt do anything about it.. after 2 years.. you should know the person your dealing with and not ask why are you upset or what is wrong..when they have already told you what is wrong..and why.. in detail.. every single time..

I need advice.. on how to follow through.. my family and best friends even think i should leave him but understand how i dont want to lose my place due to no income.. and why im waiting.. just i dont know how much longer i can handle this.. ive slowly been doing my own things and what i enjoy.. which makes me realize more and more that i should just be single.  

[Isis Sister Of Osiris]

I'm going to be rather harsh, because it IS a harsh truth.

Everything I've read here tells me he's tired of you and pretty much only keeps you there because you're free p***y and domestic help. Guess what, if he decides he no longer wants you there (which he seems really close to, anyway), you and your daughter will be out on your asses anyway.

You have a support network, you have family willing to help. It's time to turn to them. HE doesn't give enough of a damn about you, much less your daughter who isn't his.

RUN, do not walk, to Family Services and sign up for anything and everything you can. Medicaid, WIC, food stamps, cash assistance... everything.

Don't just wait for your case to go through! Lawyers are paid to STALL. Right now you have NO JOB. NO INCOME. HE DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS.  

[killizworth]

Isis Wife Of Osiris

Thank you for your honesty heart  

[Isis Sister Of Osiris]

killizworth

Isis Wife Of Osiris

Thank you for your honesty heart

emotion_hug You're welcome. I truly hope I'm wrong, but I'd rather err on the side of caution.  

[Caimbrie]

Isis Wife Of Osiris

I'm going to be rather harsh, because it IS a harsh truth.

Everything I've read here tells me he's tired of you and pretty much only keeps you there because you're free p***y and domestic help. Guess what, if he decides he no longer wants you there (which he seems really close to, anyway), you and your daughter will be out on your asses anyway.

You have a support network, you have family willing to help. It's time to turn to them. HE doesn't give enough of a damn about you, much less your daughter who isn't his.

RUN, do not walk, to Family Services and sign up for anything and everything you can. Medicaid, WIC, food stamps, cash assistance... everything.

Don't just wait for your case to go through! Lawyers are paid to STALL. Right now you have NO JOB. NO INCOME. HE DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS.

I'm agreeing with this, you could also be eligible to benefits too - I don't have much information - assuming you live in America, but in the United Kingdom there is some child benefits (and other benefits: they're usually income support) along with the family services, food banks you can visit and so forth, you shouldn't really have to deal with a man just because you feel like you need his money. I'd rather boot him out and go through the family services/benefits route, but there is one thing: It does take time to get sometimes support from the Family Services and benefits (especially, as you have to prove you're entitled to it usually), but you should certainly go back with your parents or a friend, I'm sure there is someone you know that is willing to help you.  

[killizworth]

Caimbrie

Ya I'm asking the lawyers about Ontario works(WellFare) and if I can apply for it while the case is going on. I know once we breAk up and I kick him out of my house, the lawyer won't take us both for the case.. Or we will both be dropped so I have more debt to pay instead of going through with the settlement. Just re-told him yesterday that I don't believe we will be together once the settlement is over. He seemed shocked but I know he knows it's coming regardless. I'm in canada and already have child benefits but it's only enough to cover her needs. My family and friends understand and are on the borderlines waiting to come rush in and take him out when I say the word lol weird metaphor but I know it will be soon just worried about getting ******** over by the lawyers. Sort of wish we didn't bother with a case lol would of made things easier tbh.