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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2006 9:12 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 12:47 am
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 9:56 am
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 10:27 am
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 11:45 am
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 12:23 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 12:57 pm
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The girl I love refuses to become more than friends with me, though she has already admitted to loving me... I'll post the e-mail she sent me last night. Heh, she sent me this before i even asked her out....
Alexx... 3
I'm going to kill somebody. Preferably myself. Brennan was online when I came on... and suddenly started on me about how I'm not there for you. And how he's sick of " carrying you on his back " and wondering why I can't just be with you and make you happy.
Well... I can't. I'm sorry. I know I've told you before... but I'm doing it again. One last time. I'm sorry, Alexx. I honestly wish I could. I do like you... a lot. But... if we did get together.. I'd never move on. And I need to, more then ever. I wish I could put you first.. but.. I suppose if I don't care about myself, how can anybody else? And if we did get together, yes, it would be neat... but... it would be no fun. For me, thus, no fun for you. I would be depressed or worse. Not because of you... I don't know how to explain it... but it just wouldn't work out for me. I'd be falling apart double time behind the mask of happiness I would create just for you. And when someone finally realized it... it would be too late. I don't want that... and I know you don't.
Plus if I don't move on, you won't. So I just want to stick to being friends. It will be hard, yes... but I'm hoping we can get through this one last thing together. Because if we can't... I don't want to even think of the outsomes then.
But... Brennan. He's sitting here, and bitching at me about how I'm not there for you, and how he's sick of fighting for you, and that if I choose to move on and leave you behind, go ahead, because I obviously never cared in the first place. And if you do commit suicide, it'll be on my shoulders.
We've made up... but it still hurts. He stung me pretty deep..
I can't put up with most of this anymore... I'm seriously holding on by a very fragile thread. Even the smallest of things will break it for me. And I'm afraid of what will happen then... I don't even know. It could be one or many things. And all of them... will probably be bad. Very bad. But... I don't want you to try to save me. It'll just make things worse for you. Honest.
So.. promise you won't try to save me? Please?
Love you.. <3
[-x-] |* Kitty /*| [-x-]
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 1:31 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 3:50 pm
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 8:47 am
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 10:32 am
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 10:59 am
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 11:01 am
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 11:05 am
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2006 11:08 am
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