Taking friend applications <3

[Read All Over]

Fill this form out in triplicate and send it over to human resources. Please include at least two references who are not family.

Details about the position are as followed:
Job Title: Buddy, pal, wingman.
Shift: Prefer full time, part time available. Days, nights, weekends, holidays, birthdays, leap years, Kwanza
Salary: Depending on experience, will be paid in lunches and awesome birthday gifts.
Job Description: Will be required to laugh at my jokes (even the unfunny ones). Will be required to keep me from making a fool of myself in public (in private is just fine). Should have an up-to-date shot record. Must be able to correctly spell 65% of the most commonly misspelled words.

Application questions:
1. Your name as it appears in the mirror:
2. Nicknames/ Aliases:
3. Age in dog years:
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter?
5. Are you able to belch your name?
6. How do you like your coffee?
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2:
8. Are you going to finish those fries?
a. If not, can you pass them this way?
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be?
10. Are you double jointed?
a. If so, in what ways?
11. Are you able to curl your tongue?
a. Prove it.
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie?
a. If not, why?
13. Cheetohs or Doritos?
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible:
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat?
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat?
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.:
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______."

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.  

[Eudaemon]

LOL

Application questions:
1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: Kayla. No last name for you! Oh wow, I thought it was some obscure reference to something I didn't get. uh....nomeaduE
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: Eudaemon or Eudae. My mom refers to me as Eudaemon online. gonk
3. Age in dog years:1.9
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? Crunchy
5. Are you able to belch your name? No
6. How do you like your coffee? I like tea.
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: 1/2
8. Are you going to finish those fries? I never finish anything!
a. If not, can you pass them this way? Yes.
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? Brigadier Smurf
10. Are you double jointed? No
a. If so, in what ways? -
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? Yes
a. Prove it. Nope.
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? No
a. If not, why? LACK OF COORDINATION
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? Cheetos!
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: 411 4 1 + 1 4 411
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? Nope
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat? n/a
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: 2 minutes
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." FIGHT BACK!

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
I.
AM.
AWE.
SOME.  

[ghgvjj]

1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: oirasinS
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: Sin
3. Age in dog years: 113.5
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? Crunchy
5. Are you able to belch your name? You bet
6. How do you like your coffee? Like a pansy
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: 0.5
8. Are you going to finish those fries? Not if you want some.
a. If not, can you pass them this way? Oh sure
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? Smurfin smurf
10. Are you double jointed? No :C
a. If so, in what ways?
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? yes
a. Prove it.
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? I doubt it.
a. If not, why? I'm too old sad
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? Cheetohs, personally.
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: -56
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? Do you want it to look bigger or do you want it to look as it is?
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat? All of the below.
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: Oh I don't breathe.
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." Kill them all.

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
I can do what I want because a pirate is free, I am a pirate.  

[Menlusa]

Application questions:
1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: Asulnem
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: Meny
3. Age in dog years: 2!
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? Creamy emotion_drool
5. Are you able to belch your name? probably not
6. How do you like your coffee? with so much sugar it ceases to be defined as coffee.
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: WHY. one half maybe?
8. Are you going to finish those fries? YOU BETCHA
a. If not, can you pass them this way? They're already gone D:
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? smurfette smurf whut
10. Are you double jointed? kindaish
a. If so, in what ways? two fingers
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? nope
a. Prove it. :c
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? what that does even mean
a. If not, why? brain difficulties...?
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? neither. VEGAN-ISH BOOST
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: 0
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? IT LOOKS FABULOUS
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat? sextastic
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: long enough to turn blue. o wait
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." bring out your emergency kitten and all will be well.

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
I'm a dark elf.
That is all I need, honeytoast  

[Infamous]

LOL I remember filling these things out in the CB when I first started Gaia. XD

1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: citcimoreM
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: Mero
3. Age in dog years: 168
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? I like both. ;D
5. Are you able to belch your name? No. >> Its too long. D:
6. How do you like your coffee? Iced but I'll drink it however pending the situation.
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: .5
8. Are you going to finish those fries? Nope.
a. If not, can you pass them this way? Sure. c:
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? Smurfette?
10. Are you double jointed? No. XD
a. If so, in what ways?
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? Nope.
a. Prove it.
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? ...I don't even know what this is.
a. If not, why?
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? Neither. XP
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: 1337
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? Nah.
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat?
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: Long enough. >>
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." be a pirate.

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
Because I can flake out in the most awesomest of ways. XD  

[DC-Chan]

Application questions:
1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: Nahc-I don't know. I don't have a mirror.
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: DC. Uh...Chan chan? Deeec. You can't really have a lot of nicknames with a name that's less than six letters total.
3. Age in dog years: Dead.
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? Creamy. Super thick.
5. Are you able to belch your name? No. Too many syllables. And a J. Which is hard to burp.
6. How do you like your coffee? Black. Like my men. cool
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: Oh god? Really? So easy. 4/2; which is reduced to 1/2. In decimals that is 0.5.
8. Are you going to finish those fries? Yes.
a. If not, can you pass them this way? NO THEY ARE MINE. I DON'T EAT FAST FOOD A LOT SO WHEN I HAVE FIRES I EAT THEM ALL.
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? John Smurf. The Smurf who traveled to the New World and fell in love with Smurfahontas.
10. Are you double jointed? No. Actually, that terrifies me.
a. If so, in what ways? emotion_8c
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? No. My whole family can, and they make fun of me.
a. Prove it. Not even into the shape of a hotdog...I am a failure of a daughter.
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? No.
a. If not, why? I lack coordination, and balance, and nerves of steel. And also read a book called "MEG". And scared a giant, prehistoric shark will attack me mid-air if I do such on a surfboard.
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? CHEETOHS. WITH THE POOFYNESS.
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: 22/7
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? Just a little. We can find some Spanx, though. You'll be super fine.
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat? Sexy fat. But only if you suck in.
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: If I blow it into a balloon, forever. eek
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." don't poop.

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
I don't like chocolate. This means I will give it to you if it ever falls into my hands.  

[aliceloatheswonderland]

1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: eerahs
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: Alice, Kitty, Catlady, Ree, the 'stache, Reetard, Tits Migee
3. Age in dog years: i have no idea..
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? creamy
5. Are you able to belch your name? I can belch an entire conversation or the alphabet on one burp.
6. How do you like your coffee? Milk, one sugar
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: 4x.5=2?
8. Are you going to finish those fries? yes
a. If not, can you pass them this way?
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? Stoner Smurf or perhaps Heartless b***h smurf.. or whorey smurf
10. Are you double jointed? Apparently
a. If so, in what ways? In my pinky
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? Yes
a. Prove it. Pix for pix biggrin
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? no
a. If not, why? I am uncooridinated
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? Only got The latter in my country for the first time this year.. wont pay $5 a bag for them.
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: 24787.. idk that is my birthdate
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? Yes
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat? Like you have two asses
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: not long enough!
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." Offer them sex and they might let you live.


18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
My first name sounds like "Car Tree"
??
i'm not awesome.. I'm bawwwesome  

[WinterBear]

1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: raeBretniW
2. Nicknames/ Aliases: Wint, Bear, WB
3. Age in dog years: dead
4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter? both
5. Are you able to belch your name? no
6. How do you like your coffee? If the spoon doesn't jump out and scream, it's not strong enough
7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2: x = 0.50
8. Are you going to finish those fries? no
a. If not, can you pass them this way? go for it
9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be? Ditzy Smurf (if I was a male smurf)
10. Are you double jointed? no
a. If so, in what ways? n/a
11. Are you able to curl your tongue? yes
a. Prove it. do i have to?
12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie? no
a. If not, why? klutz
13. Cheetohs or Doritos? doritos
14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible: 42
15. Does this dress make my butt look fat? No
a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat? n/a
16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.: maybe 1.5 min.
17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." scream like a little girl and play dead

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
n/a. I'm a mugwhump, honestly. (and no, I don't mean a muggle)  

[acn period]

___● Hahaha, this is brilliant!

Application questions:
1. Your name as it appears in the mirror:
doirep nca

2. Nicknames/ Aliases:
Klein

3. Age in dog years:
8376

4. Crunchy or Creamy peanut butter?
Smooth!

5. Are you able to belch your name?
Yes! And the alphabet, I'll have you know.

6. How do you like your coffee?
I don't drink coffee.

7. Solve this algebra equation 4X = 2:
Shakespeare.

8. Are you going to finish those fries?
Yes. Touch them and I WILL END YOU.

a. If not, can you pass them this way?
emotion_donotwant

9. If you were a smurf, what would your name be?
S Dawg.

10. Are you double jointed?
Only my thumbs!

a. If so, in what ways?
Oh... I seem to be getting ahead of myself here.

11. Are you able to curl your tongue?
No. I am a loser.

a. Prove it.
But, but...!

12. Can you land a back board slide from a 3 foot ollie?
I have no idea what that even means.

a. If not, why?
Because I am made of gold.

13. Cheetohs or Doritos?
Doritos! We don't get Cheetohs in England anyway.

14. Describe yourself numerically using as few decimal places as possible:
72

15. Does this dress make my butt look fat?
I'm not going to flatter you. Put down the fork. emotion_omnomnom

a. Sexy fat or hoo-girl-uh-uh fat?
... Sexy. redface

16. How long can you hold your breath? Note: answering this question is not required under the equal opportunity employment act.:
Like 21 seconds. I suck.

17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______."
when registering with a new GP.

18. Essay question: In 500 words or less, tell me what makes you awesome.
Hurrrr bleughhhh bleurghhhhhh  

[Read All Over]

Sinsario

11. Are you able to curl your tongue? yes
a. Prove it. http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/640/333cp.png

this photo. it wins all the internets that I have in my pocket right now.
it also looks a wee bit like a v****a.

Menlusa

6. How do you like your coffee? with so much sugar it ceases to be defined as coffee.

Quite as it should be! emotion_dowant

Meromictic

17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." be a pirate.

hellz yeah pirates <3

Nikunya

1. Your name as it appears in the mirror: eman ruoy

emotion_awesome emotion_awesome emotion_awesome

dc-chan

17. Finish this sentence: "When attacked by ninjas _______." don't poop.

herp, I never poop dramallama
I just absorb everything into my thighs and a** :C  

[ghgvjj]

Read All Over

Sinsario

11. Are you able to curl your tongue? yes
a. Prove it. http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/640/333cp.png

this photo. it wins all the internets that I have in my pocket right now.
it also looks a wee bit like a v****a.

That's exactly what I was going for*
*No it wasn't  

[Read All Over]

Sinsario

Read All Over

Sinsario

11. Are you able to curl your tongue? yes
a. Prove it. http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/640/333cp.png

this photo. it wins all the internets that I have in my pocket right now.
it also looks a wee bit like a v****a.

That's exactly what I was going for*
*No it wasn't

sometimes I just have v****a on the brain. could be because I just spent fifteen minutes trying to pick out a new lunch meat at walmart.  

[ghgvjj]

Read All Over

Sinsario

Read All Over

Sinsario

11. Are you able to curl your tongue? yes
a. Prove it. http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/640/333cp.png

this photo. it wins all the internets that I have in my pocket right now.
it also looks a wee bit like a v****a.

That's exactly what I was going for*
*No it wasn't

sometimes I just have v****a on the brain. could be because I just spent fifteen minutes trying to pick out a new lunch meat at walmart.

Oh I underst-wait what