Why can't I quit cutting..?

[The Doctors Regular]

I just can't do it... Nothing ever seems to help anymore.. I feel so ashamed...  

[Renkon Root]

What are the reasons why you cut?
What are your reasons for wanting to quit?

 

[The Doctors Regular]

I've had a bad past, and abusive friends and my family basically neglects me.
But I want to quit so the guy I love won't be disappointed and I don't have to have any more scars that I'm ashamed of...  

[Renkon Root]

These are horrible things, to be sure. But these are not reasons for cutting yourself. There have been others who've suffered abuse and/or neglect and do not mutilate themselves. What you have to decide is (and you don't have to tell me the answers to these questions if you don't want to), are you cutting yourself in an effort to get attention from others? Are you cutting yourself because you feel you need to "punish" yourself for something? Or, are you cutting yourself because you derive a masochistic pleasure from it?

Quote:

But I want to quit so the guy I love won't be disappointed and I don't have to have any more scars that I'm ashamed of...

This begs another question, do you want to stop cutting more for your boyfriend's sake or for your own sake?

Don't get me wrong, I'm totally for kids NOT cutting themselves and ending the pattern. But I've also had to learn that if you're doing something or changing an aspect of yourself for someone else then you will never succeed in changing anything. Or you will change for a little while but then quickly change back at the first test of your resolve.

What you should do is go back over the other three questions I've asked above and find the real source of your desire to cut. Then decide if you want to stop cutting for yourself or for your bf. If its for yourself then there are several things you can do to put an end to your pattern.

 

[The Doctors Regular]

It's mainly for him, but I do want to quit. I hate feeling like I nee something to just get through the day. I want to get help, but nothing has worked so far. Some things have even made it worse. So I don't know what else I can do to stop.  

[Renkon Root]

Have you sought professional help?

You can start by making it difficult for yourself to cut. Have your boyfriend (if you live together) hide the kitchen knives and make him to any serious cooking for a while. Take away any blades that you might carry on you (pocket knives, keychain blades, box-cutters, even nail files) and put them away in a place that would be very inconvenient for you to reach.

When you feel the urge to cut, ask yourself why. Why do you want to cut yourself? Then, based on your reason, explain to yourself why cutting yourself for that reason is stupid. Remind yourself that you don't want to cut and mutilating yourself doesn't hurt anyone but you.

 

[The Doctors Regular]

Yeah, I have. But it didn't work out too well.

We don't live together but I can pull that off. Thanks for the advice. That sounds like it actually might have a chance at working  

[Kitty apocalypse]

your not the only one i cant stop cutting ive been cutting sense i was 10 :/  

[IIDi3CEII]

wink I quit cutting by horrifying myself with the disgusting photos of cutting and that there is a chance for infection or maybe the possibility of losing your hand lol


even so, I'm tempted to cut myself a lot. So I do it by using a ruler, scraping the surface of wrist and pretending that I am cutting... lame i know.. sigh sad  

[The Doctors Regular]

Color My Poptart

your not the only one i cant stop cutting ive been cutting sense i was 10 :/

Wow. That's so young. But at least I'm not alone  

[The Doctors Regular]

IIDi3CEII

wink I quit cutting by horrifying myself with the disgusting photos of cutting and that there is a chance for infection or maybe the possibility of losing your hand lol


even so, I'm tempted to cut myself a lot. So I do it by using a ruler, scraping the surface of wrist and pretending that I am cutting... lame i know.. sigh sad

Man, that really sucks. But just so you know, normally when people continue to scratch it worsens and you end up cutting again. But it could be different with you.  

[IIDi3CEII]

mmhh, yeh, probably, so I just cry a lot, have negative thought. I sometimes just play zOMG for stress relieve lol  

[Muddy Marill]

I only stopped cutting recently...my parents saw the cuts and sent me straight to the mental ward of our local hospital. I spent 3 days with a bunch of messed up kids...I don't do it anymore mainly because I'm terrified of going back to that place. But I still think about it... I'm had a terrible past, I guess. I've been sexually abused, abandoned by dozens of people who I thought were my friends, and virtually ignored by my teachers who I strive to impress. But everything will get better, trust me.  

[The Doctors Regular]

I just got out of the psych ward a few weeks ago for a suicide attempt. I haven't cut since then either, and I'm still staying strong. I'm very glad that you still have hope. If you want, I think I'm pretty good at helping people, so if you ever need someone to talk to..