How to have a relationship

[X_xSin Falconx_X]

Alright, I know there probably aren't many marriage counselors or the like in this guild, but I want to pose a question:

How does one keep a relationship? Specifically, a dating one.

It probably makes me sound like some sort of robot freak, but I really want to know. I've had a history of bad relationships, meaningless flings, and being used (and using others... sad ). I've ruined quite a few friendships this way. I thought that being friends first would help, but so far it hasn't.

So I want to know... How do you keep someone by your side, without pushing them away?

 

[Seawicket]

Honesty is the best policy. wink

 

[X_xSin Falconx_X]

I am honest to a fault. Sometimes too honest, to be honest... lol

I think the huge thing that ends my relationships is that I don't know how to act around the guys I'm dating. I don't know what to say, or do, and half the time, I just never talk to them again. Either that, or I try and do the opposite and end up creeping them out.

I'm just really retarded, I guess... emo

Edit: btw, I think your signature is adorable! Did you make it yourself?  

[Arashi Erina]

Will you fight for your agenda?

You have to be yourself! If they don't like you for you, then it's not worth it.

Or will you fight for air?

 

[RawryCookieX3]

I think the problem is that you arent being yourself .
At first its okay to be shy but you have to come out of the box eventually .  

[X_xSin Falconx_X]

Maybe... I act differently all the time, though, so I really don't know which 'me' would be myself. Tis the curse of the mood swings, I guess... -.-;  

[.Vindicated.Of.Sanity.]

I think it's just a matter of waiting. The right guy will like you for who you are, no matter what (mood swings included).
I think important parts of maintaining a strong, healthy, long-lasting relationship are openness and communication, honesty, trust, and respect for one another.
I wrote a whole essay on this for my francais langue class, haha. We were supposed to write about 'fidelity', but I went off on a tangent, and managed to tie it back to fidelity.

 

[Kaiyle Brightblade]

Okay, 90% of a good relationship is choosing the right guy. If you do everything right with someone who is wrong for you, its still going to be a bad relationship. Not every guy you like will be right for you to date. When you are making your decision, consider a few things. First, how does he treat his friends? Would you like to be treated that way? Second, do you two have interests in common? The more things you have in common, the easier it will be for you two to spend time together and also have normal conversations.

Most high school relationships that have ended quickly are the result of two people going out based on physical attraction or crushes, and realizing within a few weeks that they have nothing to talk about. Try to find someone who likes the same things as you, or who would be interested in trying the things you like to do. Or, someone who would like to share their interests with you. This should help with your problem of how to act around your boyfriends.

First, you should ask him about what he likes to do. Chances are he will really appreciate talking about his hobbies, which will get the conversation rolling on a first date or the first few times you guys are just hanging out. Most likely he'll ask you about what you like to do. Once you guys know a little more about each other, see if there's an interest you share that you could try to do together. If you like the same band, you could try to find tickets to one of their concerts or listen to their music together. And so on. Gradually you can branch out by talking about your opinions on all sorts of things. Once you guys feel comfortable talking about a wide variety of subjects, things should be easier.  

[Angel Nicholson]

Kaiyle Brightblade

Okay, 90% of a good relationship is choosing the right guy. If you do everything right with someone who is wrong for you, its still going to be a bad relationship. Not every guy you like will be right for you to date. When you are making your decision, consider a few things. First, how does he treat his friends? Would you like to be treated that way? Second, do you two have interests in common? The more things you have in common, the easier it will be for you two to spend time together and also have normal conversations.

Most high school relationships that have ended quickly are the result of two people going out based on physical attraction or crushes, and realizing within a few weeks that they have nothing to talk about. Try to find someone who likes the same things as you, or who would be interested in trying the things you like to do. Or, someone who would like to share their interests with you. This should help with your problem of how to act around your boyfriends.

First, you should ask him about what he likes to do. Chances are he will really appreciate talking about his hobbies, which will get the conversation rolling on a first date or the first few times you guys are just hanging out. Most likely he'll ask you about what you like to do. Once you guys know a little more about each other, see if there's an interest you share that you could try to do together. If you like the same band, you could try to find tickets to one of their concerts or listen to their music together. And so on. Gradually you can branch out by talking about your opinions on all sorts of things. Once you guys feel comfortable talking about a wide variety of subjects, things should be easier.

That post was pretty good.

But yeah, I'm in a relationship, it's strong, we're engaged and we're still keeping it strong even though he's away at university most of the time, but I don't really know what I do to keep it going. Lol you'd have to ask me specific things you'd like to know.  

[BannedAccount8623822]

If you TOO honest then it's most likely you get hurt especially in the "oh whatever" dating kind of way.  

[Aliareana]

You just need to be yourself. Don't worry about what you think you should be doing. Just enjoy being with the person.

I'm sure you have friends... how do you keep your friendships going?  

[X_xSin Falconx_X]

Kaiyle Brightblade

Okay, 90% of a good relationship is choosing the right guy. If you do everything right with someone who is wrong for you, its still going to be a bad relationship. Not every guy you like will be right for you to date. When you are making your decision, consider a few things. First, how does he treat his friends? Would you like to be treated that way? Second, do you two have interests in common? The more things you have in common, the easier it will be for you two to spend time together and also have normal conversations.

Most high school relationships that have ended quickly are the result of two people going out based on physical attraction or crushes, and realizing within a few weeks that they have nothing to talk about. Try to find someone who likes the same things as you, or who would be interested in trying the things you like to do. Or, someone who would like to share their interests with you. This should help with your problem of how to act around your boyfriends.

First, you should ask him about what he likes to do. Chances are he will really appreciate talking about his hobbies, which will get the conversation rolling on a first date or the first few times you guys are just hanging out. Most likely he'll ask you about what you like to do. Once you guys know a little more about each other, see if there's an interest you share that you could try to do together. If you like the same band, you could try to find tickets to one of their concerts or listen to their music together. And so on. Gradually you can branch out by talking about your opinions on all sorts of things. Once you guys feel comfortable talking about a wide variety of subjects, things should be easier.

I like this post. 'Twas very helpful. Thank-you!

I think half of it is that I'm socially retarded. Like, not to the point where I do socially unacceptable things, but...

Off subject: I think I actually found a guy who has the same problems that I do. It's so weird. We're amazingly alike, to the point where we often say the same thing at the same time. Sometimes I wonder if we weren't twins separated at birth. rofl