Escape and Release

[evolvingwolf]

Heat like liquid fire
Surrounding us completely
Panted breaths escape straining lungs
And whispered names ignite our passion
Moans and sighs of contentment
Mingle with aching bodies
Claws tear at rumpled sheets
Longing for each others touch.  

[Stelle Cadenti]

I can't tell if it was intentional on your part, but the alternating lines are kind of like, I don't know how to phrase this, one is rough, then the next is smooth. Like inhaling and exhaling almost, or waves, that works. I love how that creates such passion, it gets really tense, but then the pressure is relieved, then it gets tense again. Makes for a very good poem, short and sweet.  

[evolvingwolf]

I can't believe you got the breathing pattern with the lines! ^_^ Thanks for another great feedback!  

[Stelle Cadenti]

Was that intentional then? It was very natural, it seemed like something that just came with the words, if that makes any sense at all.  

[evolvingwolf]

Yup! And it does.  

[writerprincess29]

That style adds a lot to the poem, and makes it more... passionate? Powerful? In the moment? I think it's all three.  

[evolvingwolf]

@writer Thank you so much for your comment!  

[EstoPerpetua]

I agree with Stelle. It flows in a very unique fashion making it all the more intriguing. Yet again, with your work, I find myself awed by its flow and almost melodic quality. Your descriptive language is, as always, commendable, and gets to the point in a creative and ingenious way. I'd love to read more!