Illusion

[dare2bninjacookie]

NOTE BEFORE READING: To be honest, a part of me is very hesitant about posting this so soon. I really want to get feedback now, even though I'm still in the very early stages of proofreading through my unfinished story. I'm not the best with grammar and spelling, but I honestly did try my best to touch it up before I posted. Still, I don't doubt that you'll see several grammar and spelling mistakes. So, please bare with me on that.

Chapter 1 – Welcome Home

I can't really explain the things that happen in my life, they are what they are. I guess I am what you'd like to call a freak, like the fish boy or bearded lady you'd see at sideshow carnivals, but on the outside you'd think I was just like everyone else. You're one of the lucky ones if you still think that after meeting me. My name is Emily Briar and things haven't been normal for me for quite some time now. At least, not since my dad's accident...

“I know this must be hard for you Em, but I know you'll really come to love staying with us once you get used to it.” Benjamin Briar encouraged, his attempt at conversation unconvincing. I broke my gaze away from the car window to glare at him.

“Don't call me that!” I ordered, immediately. “You don't want me to start calling you Mr. Clean now, do you?” He smiled at the comment because, in the end, he knew it was true. Like Mr. Clean, he was willingly bald, tan, and built like a tank. Years of experience in the army, without a doubt, would cause such a massive build in muscle. The only thing bigger would have had to be his blond mustache that stretched wildly across his upper lip as if it had a mind of its own.

“Okay, okay, fine, I won't call you that.” His hands lifted off the steering wheel for just a brief second, as if to block another verbal attack I might throw his way. From there, the car ride quickly faded into silence again, the only sound emitting from the radio with its frequent blend of classic rock and static.

“Here we are!” he finally announced, smiling at the small suburban house before us, proud of it. I raised an eyebrow at the house that looked to be centuries old and began to mumble under my breath.

“This is it?” I asked, half still contemplating on whether or not he was serious, “Uncle Ben, you can't possibly be telling me you live in this!”

He ignored me and got out of the car to get my things from the backseat. Sure enough, by now he was probably regretting having taken me in after what happened. He never liked my dad, why would he ever consider liking me? I opened the back door for him, regardless and let him walk ahead of me for reassurance that the house wouldn't collapse on top of me if I stepped foot inside.

I followed him through the house like a lost puppy, looking around at everything. The hallway alone drew the markings of a bad interior decorator with its chipped paint job that mixed together a forest green wall with dark red trimmings.

“Hey Santa, where's the reindeer?” I wondered quietly to myself as we started up the stairs, noticing going up step-by-step how little wooden frames followed us along the wall with pictures of my uncle and his wife sitting inside them. It was the only thing in the house that really made it seem like a home.

“In here,” Uncle Ben announced waddling into the room like a penguin, carrying all my belongings into the room with one trip.

Upon entering the room, my eyes widened with horror at the disgusting sight before me. The nursery looked like it had once been based off of a 1930's circus show. The faded pink and white ceiling streamed downward onto the walls to resemble the inside of a circus tent, while beneath the tent itself, was the actual circus act mixed with washed-out paintings of elephants, monkeys, and clowns. It was obvious this room had never been used prior to this arrangement, the stuffed animals on the pink-quilted bed didn't look new and neither did the various glass dolls mantled on the shelves around the room. Overall, the room smelled of dust and the presence of something that no longer existed.

“Are you sure America's founding father's weren't stuffed in the walls or something?” I asked, attempting to be as polite as possible this time. Uncle Ben scowled at me, it barely visible underneath his mustache.

“No,” he answered, turning to leave the room.

“So, we're not going to check for ghosts? I mean, are you absolutely sure there's no dead babies in the closest or underneath the floorboards?” The fear in my voice was more visible than my sarcasm this time. I looked around the room again, actually scared of it. Suddenly, he turned back around to face me.

“Damn it, Emily! There's nothing wrong with the house!” Uncle Ben shouted, “Do you honestly believe that if there was we'd live here or, for that matter, bring you into an unstable environment? What else would you like me to change, Emily? God forbid my brother's daughter is unhappy!”

I stood there silently, forbidding the tears from forming in my eyes as I searched for somewhere else to look. Anywhere else seemed better than looking at this man who was presumably my dad's older brother. I quickly focused on the floorboards and began to pray silently to some sort of God that there was nothing underneath them but a collection of dust that had accumulated there over time. As I did, Uncle Ben chose to walk away from the mess he had suddenly created, that's when I realized he never actually wanted me here in the first place.  

[dare2bninjacookie]

Chapter 2 - Aunt Mackenzie

As long as I can remember, my dad would go away on business trips. It was like his thing. One minute he would be here and the next day he'd be half-way across the world, doing what he loved to do. He was a professional wildlife photographer, mainly taking pictures for magazines such as National Geographics and National Wildlife. He was actually gone for most of my life, but when he was around he always made it count, especially every year on my birthday.

“Daddy, I don't wanna have my picture taken!” A six-year-old Emily Briar giggled, shyly attempting to hide behind her long, thick red hair as she heard the snap of the camera go off again.

“Come on, Emmy. Daddy only wants to take a few more!” Bobby Briar reassured, positioning himself for another picture by moving his blond hair out of his eyes.”It's your birthday! You deserve to be treated like a princess!” Without another word, as if to agree, she smiled a toothless grin for the picture then dashed for the pile of colorful leaves behind her.

“Emmy, don't get lost in there, okay? I won't be able to find you again when it comes time to leave!” He teased, putting his expensive camera back into its case.

“I'm right here, daddy! See?” she reassured while shaking her head quickly, already telling him that she didn't want to go. This place was nothing short of heaven to her, why would she want to leave?

Emily starred up at blue sky that was barely noticeable behind all of the gold and orange leaves that still clung to the trees above her. There was still millions of them that had yet to fall onto the cold, autumn ground. She smiled wide, she had no problem waiting until they did.

“Hey Em?” she heard her dad walk towards her, she sat up in the pile, a good chunk of the leaves still tangled in her hair.

“Yeah?” Bobby took a moment to smile at the sight before him as he kneeled down beside her. Emily knew, even then, that he was taking a picture with his eyes this time, instead of his camera.

“I want you to have this.” he began, taking a black beanie out of his pocket and placing it in her lap. He watched her ice blue eyes light up and continued, “It was my security blanket. When I was younger, I didn't go anywhere without it. I thought maybe you would like to wear it now for me. That way, even if you felt alone, I'd always be there with you.”

“Woah! Thanks daddy!” Emily chimed, her toothless smile never failing her as she sat the beanie on her head. The hat was so large it covered over her entire face.

“Silly girl,” he whispered, adjusting the hat so she could see. “Is that better?” he asked, speaking a little louder this time.

“Thank you,” she mumbled.

“Your welcome. Oh- do you hear that?” he asked, suddenly cutting himself off.

“No, what?” Emily questioned, curious, yet excited at the same time. He grinned and began to chant silentely to himself getting louder and louder with each second that passed.

“Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream! Emily, you want some ice cream?” Bobby shouted, getting up to his feet.

“Yeah! Ice cream!”

“Well, come on then! Let's go get some ice cream!” he picked her up onto his shoulders and carried her to the picnic table nearby. She knew this would be the best birthday ever, even if she had said that every year prior to this one. Somehow, she just knew it would be true this time.

That was a long time ago, though and this year was different. This year, my dad never came back from his business trip and on my birthday he never showed up. As far as I could tell the long stream of amazing birthday's was now over and so was the life I never thought I would miss.

I starred into my bedroom mirror, wiping away the tears that streamed down my cheeks. They were the tears I'd never let anyone see or even know that I had inside of me for that matter, because I was stronger than this.

“Get yourself together, Emily!” I told myself, almost yelling. “He's gone and there's nothing you can do about it!”

I sighed heavily, closed my eyes for a moment and then opened them again. My reflection still dully matched the same little girl I used to be. My hair was still long, unattainably thick, and red and I still shivered at the sight of my icy-colored eyes. Everytime I starred into them I thought of freezing, cold water and hypothermia. Since I was younger, my size never changed much either. For a sixteen-year-old, I was inhumanly smaller than average and severely doubted that I'd ever reach the
five-foot mark before death. My dad's beanie remained on my head at all times, as well.

As if on cue, I heard the sound of glass shattering downstairs and I dashed from the room until I found the kitchen. The kitchen, like the rest of the house, was definitely laughable. Instantly, once I had stepped inside I felt like I had walked into Barbie's dream home mixed with a noticeable Sesame Street theme. The entire room was pink: the walls, the ceiling, the tables, the chairs, and everything else. I had no doubt in my mind that the silver wear was of the same color, either. The only thing that wasn't was the big-bird yellow cupboards and counter tops, so clear-as-day, it was actually blinding. I took a moment to laugh before I remembered why I even stepped into this ridiculousness in the first place.

“Watch where you step, Emily!” A woman's voice wailed. I turned and suddenly the same woman was knealing before me, picking up pieces of broken glass off the floor. I quickly leaned down to help her.

“What the hell happened here?” I asked, carefully placing the bigger pieces in a nearby trash can.

“I forgot my house key and I didn't see Ben's jeep. I figured no one was home, so I broke the kitchen window to get inside.” she confessed, looking up at me. Her silver eyes were hypnotic, sending me into a trance the second I starred into them. I gulped instantly, terrified. I wasn't sure if I was more afraid of how abnormal they looked or of the fact that I couldn't look away. When she looked back down to finish cleaning up the shattered glass is when I could finally break away to gaze as something else.

The rest of her was completely normal for a human. She had short black hair that never stretched an inch past her chin, but her height certainly made up for that. The woman could tower over me like a lion could tower over the baby mouse it wanted to eat for dinner. Usually that wouldn't scare me, however this time it did. She certainly had the muscles and scars left over from combat to prove she could single-handedly kick my a** if she needed to and would have no problem doing so if I gave her a reason.

Once the rest of the glass was swept up and in the trash, she looked up at me again and smiled. I swallowed hard again and stepped back, gripping hard on one of the pink chairs behind me.

“I'm sorry I scared you.” she said. She smiled apologetically, but her eyes still suggested something different, something vicious.

“Oh, it's okay.” I breathed in deeply.

“I'm your Aunt Mackenzie, by the way.” she smiled wider.

“Yeah, I kind of figured you just had to be family. What other kind of people would break into a house? This house especially...” I looked around, avoiding eye contact with her as much as possible.
“Ah, Ben warned me you had an opinion-”

“Yeah, on just about everything.” I interrupted.

“Well, dinner will be ready around seven.”

She turned around and started digging through the cupboards, as I took my chance to run out of the room and back up the stairs. The little nursery, as creepy and smelly as it was to be in, was the safest place to hide from that banshee of a woman down in the kitchen. My only thoughts now were, how was I supposed to live with it?


It didn't come as much of a shock to me when Uncle Ben decided not to show up for dinner that night. Long before now, I had known of the wall that my dad and uncle had put between eachother after years of endless fighting, but to Aunt Mackenzie it was no excuse. She had spent most of the dinner calling him on his cellphone, her plate untouched. Her anger with him was so obvious, I was petrified in my seat. Eventually, she had become fed up with his silence and threw her plate against the wall in frustration, ending the dinner.

I, like Aunt Mackenzie, had barely touched my meal. It's hard to eat when you know someone you love no longer can.

“I'm so sorry!” Aunt Mackenzie pleaded, her tears falling shamefully from her eyes.

“Wha-” I began, my words were cut short by the woman's bone-crushing hug. She pulled away quickly, letting me breathe.

“ I must be giving you the worst impression! I just wanted us all to be one big, happy family! I wanted you to enjoy staying here!” she babbled. Aunt Mackenzie tried to hug me again, but I abruptly stepped away before she could, afraid she might crush me to death. She nodded slowly at this motion, probably thinking she could read me like a book now.

“Umm-” I started. I honestly didn't know what to say to respond to the gesture.

“I completely forgot that you'd rather keep your distance, I'm so sorry!” she stammered.

“No, it's-”

“Mrs. Williams told me you'd want to keep your distance from everyone. She told me you wouldn't eat much either, I should've known!” Her bewitched eyes glanced at the table and then back to me. I quivered again, the mere thought of her silver irises focusing on me was enough to scare me.

“It's fine!” I choked, holding my tears back again, but she continued unknowingly as to how much it hurt. So, this is how she was going to kill me. I starred down at the pink linoleum floor and just took it.

“No, it's not! It's hard losing a parent, especially to something as tragic as a car accident.” she blurted out. “ I wish things were different for you. I really wish they were!”

“But they're not!” I shouted, shocking myself by staring directly at what I feared. “ Do me one hell of a favor and just stay out of it!” I stormed out of the room.

“Emily, but you need to get it out-” Aunt Mackenzie begged.

I slammed the nursery door and that's where I remained for the rest of the night. I feverishly tossed every stuffed animal off the bed and buried myself under the blankets to sob.

“I'm not here! I'm not here! I'm not here!” I repeated, weakly. I sighed into the pillow and rolled over exhausted, unbeknowst that I was whispering something totally different right before I had fallen asleep.

“Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream!”  

[DreamingRoses1224]

Wow. LOVE that last part. It pulled it all together.

The aunt-niece relationship is shaky. I can't really get a feel for the aunt's character or what she expected of Emily. I'd make the first meeting a bit longer. It seemed too cut off and short.

The transition in, "Everytime I starred into them I thought of freezing, cold water and hypothermia. Since I was younger, my size never changed much either." It's a bit ackward. I'd just make it into two seperate paragraphs: eyes paragraph and size paragraph.

I did find a few grammatical errors, but you can cure those later.

I like your description of everything. It's easy to relate to and it feels like I'm there, except for the scenes with the aunt- as I said before, they are abrupt and I don't understand the aunt's character very well.

Flash back is nice.

That's all the critique I have to offer. Nice job! Can't wait to read more! --ATW  

[dare2bninjacookie]

Cool. Thanks.
I'll post more soon. mrgreen