[edited Apr 20 '08] Yellow's Computer Paper

[Yulo-chan]

About Me.
Errr. Hi, I'm Yellow, but nowadays I prefer YellowHBPencil. XD Well that's pretty much it.

Oh yeah and it's named computer paper because I'd be lying if I said that my stuff comes from my sketchbook. I drew everything on computer paper. XD  

[Yulo-chan]

My biggest concern is anatomy right now, and... hair. Sorry I can't be more descriptive about it. ;3; Just scout out for flaws, big ones, small ones, suggestions for improvement for future drawings. Even after looking at others' drawings of hair, I still draw hair like that. *points* =3=;;; Uhm... don't mind the massive sprig of hair sticking out of the top of her head. XD I love that.

P A S T .
x  

[Yulo-chan]

Reserved heart

Maybe this'll be my past/old art.... thing. *sketches out layout of my thread*  

[Yulo-chan]

Thanks for visiting! You may now post. XD It might take me a while to respond. There's no... subscribe button? ):  

[Chaotic Mana]

First off, I think you need to add highlights to her scarf, it's almost too dark to see. I'm also not sure what her eyes are suppose to be doing, are they glowing? If so, you can use that as another light source to highlight the scarf in the front. Give the highlights a tinge of blue because the eyes are glowing blue. I don't think you need to worry about the moon that much because all of your lighting is from the back anyways. I think her hair looks good, though I usually add more detail, so if that is what you're looking for, add more lines and vary the colours more. So, use an even darker blonde with you hair, you know, add more tones. The wrinkles are her pants are nice, but try punching it up a little more so they stand out and are not overlooked, don't forget all the straps would pull on the material too. I think her hand is placed too high on her waist... it needs to be down resting on the top portion of her pelvis. Stand up and strike the pose, see if its the same.
Hope that helps and keep up the good work.  

[Yulo-chan]

Ooh thanks! XD I didn't even notice most of those things that you mentioned. Yes her eyes are supposedly glowing. 8D;;

I'll try my best to fix it. I have a question though, what do you mean "punching it up a little more"? You mean make the shine more extreme or what?  

[Chaotic Mana]

YellowHBPencil

Ooh thanks! XD I didn't even notice most of those things that you mentioned. Yes her eyes are supposedly glowing. 8D;;

I'll try my best to fix it. I have a question though, what do you mean "punching it up a little more"? You mean make the shine more extreme or what?

Yup, add more contrast by making the highlights even lighter to show off your nice wrinkles you worked on.  

[KotokoPlum]

Try adding some other tones to your work, like blues/purples for shadows. It sounds weird, but I've seen it work. O: I personally still don't understand it much... but I hope this kinda helps. @ 3@

I am here, though, to talk about hair. C: Your is actually very cute. It's the generic anime styled hair, which really usually isn't realistic at all anyways. xD So I don't quite understand why you dislike it that much. What bothers me is the halo shine. ;____; You made little gradients that look nice, but then there's this huge white patch obscuring my view of the pretty hair. Whyyyy?

Note: If you want more realistic hair, you just have to add more lines in and soften the ends. You draw, like most manga style artists do, in chunks. the bottom of this girl's hair ends in triangle shapes that point out. When that happens, it does tend to look very fake (or overly gelled.) Think about how real people look! How would you get a regular person to get their hair like that? If the answer is loads of gel, that's probably no good.
http://zhoushijie.deviantart.com/art/Inking-Pracitce-Chibi-52213960
I'm kind of a hypocrite because my hair is not really much better than yours but can you see that while the hair does end in a triangle shape, it goes with a certain flow?

I hope this made sense! O: <3  

[Yulo-chan]

Oooh thanks I lot, I see. XD Edited the.. post. Thing. I finally made something new. *u*  

[apiyo]

Very cute pic, and your inking is nice and consistent. Just a few things. When you do ink, think about line weight. All of your lines are the same color, except the eye lids. It flattens the picture. Stuff that overlaps other things should have thicker lines and things that are further away have thicker lines. You can change up line thickness in the hair and wings to make it pop more and outlines are also thicker.

A few anatomical things, her head and face is crooked. Make sure that when you draw your heads they aren't lopsided. As it stands, her head is shaped very strangly. Also, her eyes and ears don't quite seem to be aligned with eachother either, the left eye is rotated tad to the right and the ears aren't level. And her chin isn't on center, as seen in the red lining. Her top half is okay, I'd prefer the arm's to be more arm-shaped but pay no heed to my whining as that's just my asthetic.

On her bottom half the hips and leg sizes don't really match. If your going to draw her hips that curvy, make her legs bigger too. I've noticed in your older picture as well that you tend to draw your legs too small. For her right leg you have going on what I call the "pipe cleaner affect." Legs do not bend in that matter. When a leg is drawn from that angle the thigh overlaps the calf in the way that I redlined.  

[Yulo-chan]

Oooh. Btw it's not inked. xD; I don't have any ink. C: It's all pencil and eraser. And paper. Err... ink weight.. will also apply to pencil weight, right? XD
Oooh, and I used to do that line thickness thing with pencil, but it smudged too much, so I stopped. =3= I should practice not-smudging.

*absorbs anatomy lecture*  

[apiyo]

Oh, if it's for a pencil then I guess your hands are tied. Unless you colour it on the Photoshop or a similar program, then you could put line weights. But just on a pencil and paper, your okay then.  

[Anetra_Pendragon]

The whole "line weight" thing basically just amounts to making the lines thicker and thinner. If you're using india ink, or have a really sweet brush pen that you're good with, you can achieve this by pressing lighter or harder on the pen. This is the same as, with the pencil, getting a lighter or darker line - and it will, also, achieve the same look.

If you want to keep your lines all a uniform weight, you can vary their widths to add visual interest.
 

[blackmoondrops]

One thing I wanted to mention to add to the other comments about your past picture is to add shading on her forehead as well. It seems to be something that's commonly over-looked even by me sometimes.