How to uncreate a presence?

[Bastemhet]

Hello, I'm new to this guild and it's a pleasure to be able to access this knowledgeable community.

I have a problem that's making it very difficult for me to sleep peacefully. I have some issues with darkness, especially the deep darkness in which you can't see your own hand even if it's right in front of your face. I had a traumatic experience with darkness when I was young and ever since then have felt unsafe in the dark, like there are things right behind my back that are hovering over me, wanting to get at me. While I don't think that I can be physically harmed by any spirit or whatever is there, that trepidation alone is enough to make me feel scared.

I also know that there is a playful ghost that likes to follow me up and down the stairs. I know he does not have any ill will toward me and rather likes me, but I really hate the feeling of things being behind me that I can't see or hear. I'm presently working on saving money to have my house cleansed by a friend of mine, who himself is worried about a bad spirit who has been afflicting my mother for a long time.

My problem is that recently the darkness in one corner of my room has begun to really bother me. Here's an outline of my room:



The little square at the top left is my doorway, and the door is on the left. My bed is on the far right, against the wall. At night, that little corner is a lot darker than the rest of my room, and sometimes it feels unnaturally so. While this very well may be just my imagination, things imagined may have a strength of their own. I find myself opening my eyes several times a night to check that corner, and feel vulnerable turning my back to it. While there was only a small feeling of fear in the beginning, it has begun to grow.

At one point I tried to imagine a bright light as a shield and pray that the thing in that corner couldn't touch me. I prayed so fervently that I felt for the second time in my life something heard me and flooded me with a little strength, courage, and calmness. But as soon as that feeling left, terror flooded back into my heart, as if the thing was just waiting for whatever was there to leave so that it could feed upon my fear once more.

Last night I tried to meditate with the lights on, but I felt that the space to my left, where that area was, was palpable. The air felt thick like it was filled in that area. I am worried whether I have created a presence just by imagining it and strengthening it with my own fear.

How can I get over this? What do you think about it? Is it just a darkness phobia or can I do something to allay my fears, like set up wards, or practice shielding? I feel like this is silly, and some may scoff at it, but I hate needing to open my eyes just to make sure nothing is there every night. I thought of putting a night light there, but that will only delay the problem, and I don't think it's a positive step toward dealing with it. Any and all help is appreciated.  

[TeaDidikai]

Sophist

Hello, I'm new to this guild and it's a pleasure to be able to access this knowledgeable community.

Welcome welcome!

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I have a problem that's making it very difficult for me to sleep peacefully. I have some issues with darkness, especially the deep darkness in which you can't see your own hand even if it's right in front of your face. I had a traumatic experience with darkness when I was young and ever since then have felt unsafe in the dark, like there are things right behind my back that are hovering over me, wanting to get at me. While I don't think that I can be physically harmed by any spirit or whatever is there, that trepidation alone is enough to make me feel scared.

Trauma is the kind of thing that professionals with an education in psychology need to help you with.

Or you can try and work through your trauma issues on your own.

The quick fix in the meantime, a night light. This is by no means a mocking suggestion. Sleep is important! Quality sleep is very important. If something as simple a night light can provide you with better sleep- go for it!

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I also know that there is a playful ghost that likes to follow me up and down the stairs. I know he does not have any ill will toward me and rather likes me, but I really hate the feeling of things being behind me that I can't see or hear. I'm presently working on saving money to have my house cleansed by a friend of mine, who himself is worried about a bad spirit who has been afflicting my mother for a long time.

What makes you think it is a ghost?

I am also curious as to what you are "saving up for"?

If you are concerned that you have generated a thought-form in that corner, there are a number of ways one can go about taking care of it.

If you have a particular paradigm- there might be something in tradition that could be of use.  

[Bastemhet]

I probably should look into therapy. I'm not afraid to the point that I can't sleep, but some nights I'm fine, like there's nothing there, and other nights I feel rather uncomfortable.

I don't know if the ghost from the stairs can get in my room or not. I hope it isn't him. But the feeling that something is there, the same feeling I get on the stairs, is even more pronounced in my room. I have no idea whether it's a ghost or not. I just feel a thickness there. Like there's something taking up space.

The problem with a night light is that there is no light socket in that area except for one that is behind a large dresser. I'll probably have to buy something that is battery powered, but most night lights I've seen are the ones that just plug in. At the same time I might have a problem sleeping when there's light in the room. I'm a sensitive sleeper and light and noise wake me up quickly.

I'm saving up for the house to be cleansed. He said he asks his deity to bless candles to be burned in the rooms, and he also burns sage I think. We didn't go into detail at the time.

I don't really have a specific paradigm that I look to. I have studied different mythologies but I guess the one deity that I feel more of a connection to others is that of Bast. But I feel like she is the type to say, "Be strong! I'm protecting you, aren't I? Nothing can escape me. So just get over it, love." Not exactly nurturing. lol I feel like I don't want to bother her with trivialities...but I guess I should at least ask.

What are some ways to dispell a thought-form?  

[TeaDidikai]

Sophist

I don't know if the ghost from the stairs can get in my room or not.

What makes you think it is a ghost?
Not saying it is or isn't- just wondering what has drawn you to the conclusion.

As for the night light- you might want to use one and sleep with a sleep blind on.

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I'm saving up for the house to be cleansed. He said he asks his deity to bless candles to be burned in the rooms, and he also burns sage I think. We didn't go into detail at the time.

Are you paying him for his time, supplies or both? Which god? What tradition does your friend claim?

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What are some ways to dispell a thought-form?

Generically- reshape it into something useful. Eat it. Banish it. ~shrugs~  

[Sivirs]

I have to second Tea on the night light. There are nights where I keep finding myself rolling over and glancing suspiciously around the room too, and one of my most traumatic experiences was having my first ever anxiety attack (one of the very very few I've ever had, I was going through a rough patch at the time that triggered them) in the middle of a horror movie. It was like the logical half of me knew that everything was just happening in the movie, but all of a sudden I kept seeing everything from the movie lunging down the theatre aisles and right at me.

This feeling followed me home and haunted me for two months. I had to leave the room light on for a long time before I could go back to normal. But, as you can see, I iz okay. wink This is not to say that you couldn't be experiencing something very real - but as someone who's had similar experiences, your mind can make things seem pretty damn real when it's already spooked. Mine sure can.

Also, if it's any consolation, the layout of your room (if I'm reading it right) would suggest a good Chinese layout for protection against evil spirits and ghosts. The idea is that spirits can only travel in straight lines, therefore having a wall immediately in front of the entrance would thwart them and prevent them entering. It's why a lot of Chinese restaurants have some kind of wall or alcove opposite the door when you walk in (the aquariums or fish ponds many of them have right NEXT to the entrance is yet another anti-spirit protective measure), although of course many people running said restaurants may not know anymore WHY they're doing this layout, they just know it's how you do a layout because that's how older folks did it.

So, I guess, if it helps any, maybe that corner's keeping nasties OUT, and that's something to take comfort in? I dunno. I don't have a lot of experience with unpleasant spirits, so I don't have good advice about that angle like Tea - I can just provide the practical angle of how I dealt with my own irrational fears (because I can't help my undying love for horror movies, especially ones that later freak me out when I'm trying to go to bed).  

[TeaDidikai]

Sivirs

...I kept seeing everything from the movie lunging down the theatre aisles and right at me.

Told you to take the 3D glasses off. But no one listens to me. wink

A quick note on the Feng Shui- there's a bit more to it than that- we'd also need some cardinal directions and the like to provide more information.  

[Bastemhet]

TeaDidikai

What makes you think it is a ghost?
Not saying it is or isn't- just wondering what has drawn you to the conclusion.

I personally only get the creepy feeling on the stairs, and have never seen or heard ghosts. I have had a boyfriend and a best friend say they either heard it, felt it, or saw it. While the boyfriend I'm not sure if I can trust, the friend would never lie to me. She can hear ghosts, and has seen some. Also, the psychic I saw said there was one, but I have nothing to fear from it.

TeaDidikai

Are you paying him for his time, supplies or both? Which god? What tradition does your friend claim?

I think I would be paying for his time and buying the candles. I'm not sure exactly which one of the orisha he speaks to, but he practices Santeria. While doing tarot he consulted a little statuette that he called la gitana, and when he cleansed my mom of the bad spirit afflicting her he drew down the spirit of a Cuban woman. While I could take this all cynically, he said one thing that he could not have known and that I was thinking at the time that makes me believe him. It was a personal matter that was very important to me and that I only talked about to my very close friends.

Sivirs, I also have had a mild panic attack in the movie theater, and it wasn't even a scary movie. I read somewhere that energy sucking spirits like to frequent theaters because people are so relaxed and almost in a trance-like state that it's easy to take their energy. I wonder if there's any truth in this?

What you say about the feng shui does help me feel a lot better. Tea, the bottom half of the room faces northwest, if that helps.

I took Tea's advice and prayed to Bast and again felt that flood of warmth and comfort. I trusted she would help me and I didn't feel afraid of that corner, nor did I feel anything in it. I think I saw you say something like not all gods are omniscient, and that was the one thing blocking me from talking to my deity. I was mistaken that all deities are omniscient because I had been brought up in a Christian atmosphere...I just assumed that they had that power because, well, they're powerful! I'm glad that will no longer be a prob for me.

Thank you very much for your help, you two. heart  

[TeaDidikai]

~twitch~ Heh. The statue had a flowing billowy skirt and a scarf eh?

Well, I'm happy you're feeling better. When I have more time I'll set a bagwa over the floor plan you gave. Does it have accurate proportions?  

[Bastemhet]

TeaDidikai

~twitch~ Heh. The statue had a flowing billowy skirt and a scarf eh?

Uh oh. Did I strike a cord? lol She had a red dress, a green scarf wrapped around her waist, and a white scarf wrapped around her head. I think. I only saw it once.

TeaDidikai

Well, I'm happy you're feeling better. When I have more time I'll set a bagwa over the floor plan you gave. Does it have accurate proportions?

Thank you! I appreciate that you'd take time out of your life to help a stranger. That's very kind. biggrin The floor plan is not accurate but I can post accurate dimensions later.

What is a bagwa? sweatdrop  

[TeaDidikai]

Sophist

Uh oh. Did I strike a cord? lol She had a red dress, a green scarf wrapped around her waist, and a white scarf wrapped around her head. I think. I only saw it once.

Nothing against you. Cultural Appropriation makes me twitch. More so when it uses ethnic slurs. You didn't know.

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Thank you! I appreciate that you'd take time out of your life to help a stranger. That's very kind. biggrin

Hesh you. You'll ruin my reputation for being an unreasonable, uncaring b***h.

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The floor plan is not accurate but I can post accurate dimensions later.

What is a bagwa? sweatdrop

The dimensions would help. I can calculate measurements from them. Also edit in any doors and windows. Putting representations of furniture in might be useful too. Depends on how much detail we're looking at.

Heck- even adding in it's relation to the rest of the house and the surrounding land features would be useful.

A Bagwa is a tool, a symbol that holds correspondences within some schools (well, most schools) of Feng Shui.  

[Neko_Bast]

I too have trouble with really dark places. The only difference is, is that I can sence spirits/energies and sometimes see them. To help me sleep, because dark rooms freek me out, I sleep with a night light. I also have night lights in just about every room of my house just in case I have to get up in the middle of the night. ^-^

I think your fear might be making you imagin things. Since you have never heard or seen ghosts it is most likely in your mind. Praying to your goddess helped your master your fear of that corner. Maby, if you havn't already, you should put up a small shrine to her near that corner of the room. You could also do a general cleansing of your house yourself.  

[Deoridhe]

I only have a few experiences with vaguely threatening things. For a while, there was a bunch in my closet. When I was a teenager, the vampire ate the rest of them. This was, for reasons still not entirely clear to me, a comfort. Now the vampire lives in the dark places and eats things that lurk. I haven't been scared of closets, or most dark spaces, since.

One other place was a house which was, apparently, very haunted. It creeped me out. I solved the problem by leaving.

Other times were, for all intents and purposes, my fault. They were solved by leaving or by altering the situation in a way to "win".

None of the above is terribly well verified, but all of the above is why I never go anywhere without my runes.  

[godhi]

Sophist

The problem with a night light is that there is no light socket in that area except for one that is behind a large dresser. I'll probably have to buy something that is battery powered, but most night lights I've seen are the ones that just plug in. At the same time I might have a problem sleeping when there's light in the room. I'm a sensitive sleeper and light and noise wake me up quickly.

How about a cheap clock radio with a very bright LED display? I've owned a few that are so bright, they damn near light up the room... but I have really good night vision, so after a few hours everything is bright to me.  

[Bastemhet]

TeaDidikai

Nothing against you. Cultural Appropriation makes me twitch. More so when it uses ethnic slurs. You didn't know.

I'm sorry to bring up a touchy subject with you. But how is it cultural appropriation?

TeaDidikai

Hesh you. You'll ruin my reputation for being an unreasonable, uncaring b***h.

But you're very reasonable. People may think you're a b***h because you turn an unflinching eye on their arguments, but I see that you love truth, and want to know in order to understand. That's not bitchy at all. I can identify with that.

TeaDidikai

The dimensions would help. I can calculate measurements from them. Also edit in any doors and windows. Putting representations of furniture in might be useful too. Depends on how much detail we're looking at.

Heck- even adding in it's relation to the rest of the house and the surrounding land features would be useful.

A Bagwa is a tool, a symbol that holds correspondences within some schools (well, most schools) of Feng Shui.

Thank you for the info. My boyfriend is studying to be an architect, so when he has some free time, possibly within the week, he'll do a rendering of the room in autocad. It should be almost completely accurate at that point. Thanks again.  

[Bastemhet]

Neko_Bast

I too have trouble with really dark places. The only difference is, is that I can sence spirits/energies and sometimes see them. To help me sleep, because dark rooms freek me out, I sleep with a night light. I also have night lights in just about every room of my house just in case I have to get up in the middle of the night. ^-^

I think your fear might be making you imagin things. Since you have never heard or seen ghosts it is most likely in your mind. Praying to your goddess helped your master your fear of that corner. Maby, if you havn't already, you should put up a small shrine to her near that corner of the room. You could also do a general cleansing of your house yourself.

You know, I've always worried that if I don't do a cleansing right I might not get rid of the entities in my house, but rather antagonize them and earn more things to be worried about. Is this unfounded? Can you direct me to a reputable resource where I can learn how to do it myself?