Eclectic Nonsense Path [under construction]

[blindfaith^_^]

The title might change, but for the moment I'm enjoying it so everyone can live with it.

Well, obviously I'm an eclectic pagan. Let's gather some sort of table of contents view here.

1st post, you're looking at it
2nd post, Deity Beliefs
3rd post, Beliefs on Good and Evil
4th post, World Viewish sort of thing Metaphorish World Mythology *Fluffy Warnings*
5th post, Ethics
6th post, Holidays
7th post Tools
8th post Reserved
9th post Reserved  

[blindfaith^_^]

Belief in Deity(ies):

I don’t believe in any traditional deity belief. That is to say, that I don’t borrow any other deity padigram and I have not created/ been contacted with any particular set of God(s). My feelings on deity and general existance follow the rules of monism or the belief that there is only one material which makes up all the universe. My particular belief states that this specific material is energy.

How this falls into place in my own mind, is that there is this universal energy that runs through us and everything around us. Through this source we are all one, and through this source we can also manipulate the world around us. Under this particular belief, because I am the Universal life energy, I am also god, as is every other thing that exists. Since I am god, I created before I came to this plane and also now while I am here, this exact experience that I am going through. What I experience now is perfect in so much that this is what I intended to experience. It isn’t my job to second guess or punish myself, but to stay a clear radio for this energy so that I can come to understand and appreciate what I placed out before myself.

This doesn't mean that I don't have any negative feelings or that negative feelings are wrong. I mourn. I rage. I love. I rejoice. What it means is that while I mourn or rage or love I do it in the moment, I experience it recognize what gifts and knowledge I have gained and then I move on. It is most important for me not to dwell, but to emote at the moment so I can be clear to experience whatever is next. It is also important for me to acknowledge that just because something does create momentary pain that does not destroy its validity and that there is much especially in these moments for me to appreciate and be thankful for.

Manifestations of God:
While I don’t believe in one God, I do believe that this universal energy takes different forms. For some people it is God, for others it is Buddha, and so on. At this point in my life, specific forms of energy like Gods have not called to me, so I most often work with raw energy that doesn't come through a certain God, personality, or deity.

Another form of energy manifestation is channeling. Through channeling one can call in a specific energy, person, or being. Some people call in deceased relatives. Some people call in faeiries or angels. Others call in saints. I call in my guides. These beings do not come from a specific set of teachings or kind of thought. They have come to me in meditation, and I believe them to exist as more than a thought form, though I do not entirely discount the possiblilty that these beings are no more than thought forms. These beings do have separate personalities and forms. I see them and think of them as separate individuals. In my general interactions there are three constant guides I work with.

The first is Celestine. She has been with me since I was a child. She is an angel in the traditional sense of the word with wings and long flowing black hair and pale skin. She’s very tall and has warm deep brown eyes. She helps me be independent and strong. She gives me courage and drives me to do what is right. I never named her when I was little, and now that I’m older, I asked her to pick a name and she has chosen Celestine, which to me is all to perfect. I was overwhelmed when she chose it because it comes from the book, The Celestine Prophecy where the author is searching for a prophecy that supposedly explains the meaning of life and in his quest for the pieces he comes to understand the interconnectedness of the universe and the power of secrets that can only be experienced to fully understand them. Celestine often takes the lead in any interactions between myself and the other guides. She reminds me of many important qualities: strength, courage, and righteousness. She also makes sure I walk my talk. Celestine hates to see anyone put anyone else down, and she urges me to intervene the moment that something bad begins to happen. Her interests are in everyone's suffering and weakness. She gives strength when it is needed but refuses vehemently to be anyone's crutch.

Another of my life time guides is a tiger, Noone. She, like the others named herself, and in the beginning when I asked her who she was she told me "I am no one," and I put the two sounds together to spell Noone. She cares only for my own protection and teaches me self reliance, endurance and how to treasure the present. She is success and independence. Like Celestine, Noone focuses very highly on strength, but she is a little more selfish. Noone is only interested in my well being. She takes no interest in others. Noone can be unnecessarily fierce because she cares about taking care of her own regardless of what’s going on, who’s in the right, or who it might hurt. Celestine reminds me of others and Noone reminds me of my own needs.

My last life long guide is Jake. After hearing what my other two guides look like, I suppose he is rather unimpressive. He is just a man about 5’6” with short blond hair and perfectly clear blue eyes. He is my guide of unconditional love and compassion. Both Noone and Celestine commonly make fun of him for being ‘wishy washy’. He doesn’t care about higher lessons, what’s right, or strength. He cares about me and how I feel, which is ironic, because the power of self love as well as unconditional love for others are some of my own hardest struggles. While both Noone and Celestine poke a lot of fun at him, because they feel he can be useless and weak, he is crucial and in some ways he is stronger than them. He is my guide of surrender. No matter what I say, do or thing, he accepts it and gets behind me and supports me. He will say things to me like “You know that is going to hurt you, so don’t do it.” or “Nothing good will come of this.” I reply with something like “yes but I’m going to do it anyway,” and he always sighs and says “well you know no matter what happens I will be there with you supporting you, and I will always love you.” After that comment he usually laughs and says “I don’t know why I even bother to tell you these things. You already know them, and we both already know that you’re going to do it anyway, and that’s one of the greatest reasons that I love you and always will, even if you never listen.” His own ability to surrender humbles me. It reminds me that I do not have to shape the world and can’t mold the world to my ego’s desire of the moment. Sometimes I have to accept highest good is not always for my immediate good and to let go and learn what the moment offers me. The moment I’m stressed or worried, he’s there rubbing my back or putting his hand over mine, or running his energy through me saying that it’s okay and that everything will work out. He calls for more patience, trust, relaxation.

I’ve had other lesser guides on my spiritual journey who have helped me to learn lessons from time to time and who still are there when I need them, but who are not necessarily lifetime guides. Some of these include a fairy (yes fairy not to be confused with faeiry, as I think this is a form she took because I would be comfortable with it and not because it was hers), Areiona and a wolf, Silverstreak. I do not see Areiona anymore eccept occasionally in the spring and summer season as a brief reminder. Silverstreak is present usually to help me with reiki and giving others the energy. He's more often a reminder that there are many ways to accomplish the same thing and if something doesn't work, change.  

[blindfaith^_^]

Beliefs on Good and Evil:

I don’t believe in good and evil. Part of that is me trying to eliminate duality in my life, as there is no duality or separation, only the perception of duality and separation. We are all one and the same. All energy is neither good or bad, it just is energy and it is all part of me and the universe as a whole.

There are no malignant beings in the world or in the energy field out to hurt/ deceive/ win you soul. Likewise there is not great battle between good and evil. Often things that are considered evil or bad are when most learning experiences come from and personal growth is brought about through. Other “evil” deeds could be performed in the wish of a soul contract with another, and while the person might not understand now when we get to the other side we will look back and understand the wisdom in what happened.

There are experiences and choices I can make where I choose not to walk my path or choose to turn away from my best interest. Often then things considered “bad” will happen to me as my guides try to get my attention, but these aren’t bad things. They are learning opportunities and chances to gain new tools.

Admittedly it is easy for me to make this statement. I have never been affected by anyone in my life who would be labeled as particularly evil. I have never been near an event or place that people consider “evil” and that always makes it easier for one to believe the best in people. I don’t know the way others know and I haven’t experienced as some have experienced. I can’t justify greater “evils” like war or genocide. I can’t make them seem less horrible or hurtful, I can only say that while I don’t understand how these events would be for anyone’s highest learning, there is a lot about the world at large I don’t understand. Certainly the concept if evil doesn’t validate either of these events, nor does it take the sting out of them. It only throws blames to another non-human being and allows us to feel disempowered, that there is nothing or little we can do. People are responsible for these events and people could change them, there is no dark force at work manipulating or convincing/influencing the event.  

[blindfaith^_^]

I started by following an origins myth that connects for me. This myth is indeed a new age bastardization of some Christianish concepts added together with several inaccurate assertions about the nature of angels and the Abricamic God. I really just like the lessons from the myth.

In this myth, originally there is only one plain of existence where all is one while maintaining its individuality. This realm is one of perfect peace, harmony, and joy. One is most connected to truth and divinity in this plain. One day a soul asked energy, what would it be like to be in a place where this connection is not? Energy responded with, if you want to experience this I will create a plain where presence is faint so you can find out, but you must bring someone else with you. The soul found another that would travel with it to this plain, only if the other soul promised to never forget who he/she was.

I like this myth of creation for many reasons. One is that I have traveled to the plain which I believe is the everything that is nothing on a few occasions through meditation, so I know what that supreme power of connection and understanding is like. I also can understand how a soul, while there, couldn’t imagine anything else.

Another thing I like about this story is that the soul asked to go, and in that way helped to co-create this plain and the experiences it gained here. I agree with the idea that in the everything that is nothing we are planned this experience together to gain the knowledge and understanding that we could really only gather through experience, as there are some truths one can’t tell a person.

Recently I have added onto that thought. One thought I’ve been playing a lot with is this idea along with the everything that is nothing, there is a plain of existence just below it where one can view this giant energy grid. Through this energy grid is a connection to everything, regardless of time, space, or plane of existence. It is a grid of quite literally infinite possibility as through this one can experience past lives, future lives, and alternate lives.

Time is relative, in this plane, we experience it linearly, but in higher reality, this illusion does not exist. The grid is one such reality where there is no time. Through travels here I have witnessed past lives and future lives. I have seen many could have been life choices too, where I am in this particular incarnation but something was slightly altered. In one, for example, my parents had died in a car crash and I was in the process of trying, with my extended family’s help to keep my brother, sister, and myself together. I had dropped out of college and was working as some sort of 9-5 job while coordinating pick ups from my sister and brother as well as balancing grocery bills. Emma worked after school to help pay the bills and my extended family sent money to help try and get us back to our feet. We’d moved to a small apartment area in a bad location. I can remember hating it and being scared for my sister and brother there. My Aunt Didi came over regularly to check on us. She had wanted to send my brother to my Aunt Terri and take Emma, I’d refused. We were constantly arguing over the situation and close to a court battle for custody of my siblings.

In another alternate world, I was living in an apartment with Jeff in Colorado. We were laughing and in the middle of a pillow fight, at the time I’d stepped in. I worked as a manager at KB Toys and took a class a block at his school, while he went full time. We didn’t have much, but we were rich in laughter. I had dropped contact with my parents, they knew I was in Colorado, that was the extent. I remember having a regret about not knowing how Emma was doing, briefly, before I realized that this was not my proper incarnation, I had never ran away to Colorado and I was pulled away from this life too.

I’ve had other experiences and learned other lessons from the grid, but that’s not really the grid’s most important function. Another ability of the grid is that one can travel back to particular points in one’s life, view them, and change the energy of the action, which in essence is the same as actually altering the event. This kind of meditation can be a huge healing tool and it can change the energies surround other events on the grid as the positive energy flows through and changes past, present, and future in one large ripple.

Of course I haven’t even gotten to the most important part of this origins myth. Certainly knowing that one co-created every situation is important. Knowing that even though every moment is perfect one can meditate and get to a grid where one can alter the energy of any moment and recreate it is also very powerful, but the most poignant point of the myth for me is where one soul asks the other not to forget him no matter what happens on their journeys. This is important to me because I do believe in soul mates, not necessarily the romantic variety, but those souls that we travel with, regardless of dimension. I think on some level we inherently recognize them and are drawn to them or repelled by them. The fact that we have such strong affects on people, even before interacting with them is fascinating. I think that we all have lessons to teach one another and that it is important in this world to try and remove presumptions and labels of others and try to see the real person and one’s real self. Its so hard to just let a person be without adjectives or thoughts, and really we all just are and we need to remember that real knowing isn’t something that can be expressed in words. Its beyond language, real knowing of someone or something can only be expressed through actions, a thought style, and the high energy transmission level that is inherently reached through such knowing. Part of this journey, maybe one of the greatest parts, is to meet another person and oneself with complete love, understanding, and compassion. To be quiet in ones own mind and allow the world to just be.

I don’t know if that really made any sense, but I try to honor just letting this experience be and appreciating it for everything. To honor and better attune myself to my journey I wake up and mediate to set my intentions for the day, and I go to be doing gratitude and sending energy to those who need it. The most significant part of high truth is not to let the big picture interrupt the here and now experience. We are here now for a reason. We are supposed to be gaining something right now, and as such I try to attune myself to every moment so that I can appreciate it and release it to be ready for the next. There is not anger, there is no worry, there is not fear, only perfection in each moment and to be centered in each moment means to understand the joy and perfection of life even in the most trying or tedious of times. All time is continuous and flowing, regardless of whether it is linear and the only sensible point of this continuous time is to throw oneself into it and surrender to the ceaseless movement and power of each instant, even if we can never capture it.