Alright. I'm a girl who's had a less than perfect life. I went through years of drug addiction (seeing as how I'm only 18, it's pretty shameful for me and I struggle with my feelings over it). In that time I had many people use me (Hey, gotta get it somehow right?) and during that time I was pregnant and had a miscarriage. After moving on through my addiction and recovering I've entered a new relationship with a guy. We dated for about three months before getting official and now we're going on two months together and I'm very happy and I feel like i can talk to him but I don't know.. how much a can and should say.
One day a joking conversation lead to me exposing the partial truth of my addiction. he kind of wanted to KNOW more but I clearly said I didn't want to talk and he agreed we wouldn't talk about it and we moved on.
Likewise when we started having sex (this was before he discovered my addiction) he asked about how many people sexually i had been with and I said five, which is much lower than the truth but i didn't want to tell him the complete truth.
Finally, he's seen me naked. I change in front of him, we have sex, my shirt will adjust oddly... it happens. And he's seen my stretch marks. He made a comment about them one day and said "it looks like someone was trying to get your cute little belly button" and he looks like he wants to ask questions about them but he won't. We've talked about kids and the future between us and a family and we're both on the same page about wanting them but whenever we talk, I feel like I should open up and tell him about the miscarriage but I'm scared and I don't want to tell him.. ever.. in a way. But I still feel that need and urge.
So what do you tell? When you get into a relationship do you tell the other one everything in the past? Even if you want to forget? Is that part of the requirements of a relationship? Or is it ok to just... not tell?
One day a joking conversation lead to me exposing the partial truth of my addiction. he kind of wanted to KNOW more but I clearly said I didn't want to talk and he agreed we wouldn't talk about it and we moved on.
Likewise when we started having sex (this was before he discovered my addiction) he asked about how many people sexually i had been with and I said five, which is much lower than the truth but i didn't want to tell him the complete truth.
Finally, he's seen me naked. I change in front of him, we have sex, my shirt will adjust oddly... it happens. And he's seen my stretch marks. He made a comment about them one day and said "it looks like someone was trying to get your cute little belly button" and he looks like he wants to ask questions about them but he won't. We've talked about kids and the future between us and a family and we're both on the same page about wanting them but whenever we talk, I feel like I should open up and tell him about the miscarriage but I'm scared and I don't want to tell him.. ever.. in a way. But I still feel that need and urge.
So what do you tell? When you get into a relationship do you tell the other one everything in the past? Even if you want to forget? Is that part of the requirements of a relationship? Or is it ok to just... not tell?
