Is being a bi a problem?

[Crew Draggy]

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Before in Seventh and Eight grade nobody used to care that I was dating a girl, but now after 4 years - now that I graduated - everybody dislikes me for the fact that I prefer girls over boys, but still like both genders. I hardly made any friends like this. Will this continue? I mean it's too hard for me, and I cant exactly handle my highschool years without friends. Could it be that I'll have to stop being bi? I dont know what to do.

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[Blood Pop]

No, it's not a problem. You shouldn't change your sexuality based on what other people will think of you. It's based solely on what you feel. All that matters is that you're honest with yourself about it.

Being a completely straight woman myself, I've never dealt with any kind of scrutiny based on my persuasion. But if I were gay/bi, I wouldn't change it just because some people don't like me because of something as trivial as that.

Just be yourself. You'll find friends that will accept you for exactly who you are. Sometimes it just takes longer than you want it to.

So yeah, hang in there.  

[Crew Draggy]

Blood Pop

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That really helped. Yes I know be like yourself and stuff. But not only the friends are the problem. I'm being humiliated too.

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[the mage-girl]

One of my best female friends, who is gay, says there is still a certain amount of bias against bisexuals from both straight and homosexual people. I found that kind of odd, but she explained that many of her lesbian friends viewed bisexuals as "not really gay". Uh, er. Okay. Whatever. rolleyes

In our group of friends, several years ago, we had a girl who we all thought was a lesbian - she was dating my best friend - but after they broke up she dated a guy for awhile. At the time I thought that was strange but I've grown up since then. smile

For a lot of people sexuality is more of a continuum, not just black-and-white. Even my lesbian friend has said in the past that she might be able to go for the right guy. I'm a girl who likes boys, but I also get crushes on girls/female characters, particularly in movies/anime/video games. Would I go for a girl under certain circumstances? I don't know.

The right people won't care who you date. If the people who have a problem with it are people who are really important to you, maybe you could sit down with them and ask them what do they particularly have a problem with in regards to your bisexuality. Make the discussion low-key, go out for ice cream or something. They may have a misunderstanding about you, or you may just have to agree to disagree on this issue.

Take care, and don't change who you are just to fit in. 3nodding  

[Blood Pop]

How are you being humiliated? Are they making fun of you just because you're bi?
If that's the case, they're either homophobic, very uneducated about sexuality, or are just picking on you because you're a little different from them. Keep your head up high and pretend you don't even notice their petty attempts to get to you. Actually, don't just pretend you don't notice them. Don't pay them any more attention at all! I'm sure you have much better things to focus your attention on. It might be hard to ignore it at first, but it gets easier, especially when you're distracted with other things, like school work or hobbies of yours. (Another benefit from ignoring them is that it seems to drives people crazy when they don't get the reaction they want from their "target". wink )

But, if it gets to a really bad point, don't be afraid to get your parents or teacher(s)/principle involved and tell them around the harassment. And if they don't help, don't be afraid for a confrontation with your tormentor. Just stand your ground and don't be afraid of them.  

[StrayKit]

being bi isn't a problem at all, and unfortunately you can get trouble from people for one, being with a girl though there's no problem with it at all, and two, for being bi. people in and outside the LGBT community seem to dislike bisexuals for no good reason. they say to pick one or the other or ask, "do you like boys or girls more?" and then based on the answer can tell you "you're not bi, you're _____". and it does seem like the older you get the more people can act less than possitively towards you. but no, you don't have to "stop being bi" or anything like that. if that's who you are, then be it, and don't worry about what other people think about it. if you're happy then there's no need to change it just because some people think they need to give you grief for it.

and you'll be able to make friends, even with the sexual preferance and attraction you have. it's possible that it may be a little harder, but you will make friends. i am sorry that people are doing things to humiliate you as well, is there anyone at all you can tell at your school about being harassed in genaral? if not then i hope you can find someone to help you with it and support you through it. i hope things get easier for you soon!  

[Mistress of The Fae]

Being bisexual isn't wrong at all!
I'm bisexual, and luckily my friends are supportive,
even though I'm in a close minded town I've found supportive friends.
I'm sorry you've lost friends because of it.
Like others have said, people are prejudice or don't "believe" in bisexuality.
That is THEIR problem, not yours.
Don't let them get to you, as difficult as that is.
You love who you love,
Forget anyone who wants to deny you who you love.
You can't change your orientation, and you shouldn't want to.
So ignore what people say that is negative and enjoy your relationship!
If you can contact a counselor or therapist to get advice about accepting yourself, maybe do that.

Sorry I can't give you anymore advice.

Crew Draggy

 

[Digital Fiend]

Being bisexual isn't a problem; but people like to treat it as one. I'm curious to how you're being humiliated also. It's not right.

I was the first of my friends to date a girl; and only one person really cared. In fact, I think that was the beginning of the end of our friendship. But why would I want to be friends with someone like that? It's sad, and it still hurts; only time will make that better.

For the most part, most of my friends have been cool with me liking both; and some have been extremely curious about it too. It can be hard because most people view bisexual people as people that just want to sleep around and aren't committed. Or, we're doing it for attention; blah blah blah.

My one Christian friend {who is very sweet, she's just a little...sheltered} asked me how I could still be bisexual when I married a guy. I told her that I didn't stop being attracted to females, I just love my husband so much. I kind of laughed too, I couldn't help it.  

[loonaboots]

tl;dr: screw them and date/ screw who you want as long as it's consensual; sexuality is fluid and can change over time but it's impossible for someone to change their own sexuality or anyone else's at the drop of a hat.
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oh my, this is a bit similar to my dilemma.
well, i'm not bisexual- i'm asexual-panromantic. that being said, people tend to get a bit weirded out when i say that this girl is cute, and then turn around and say something like "oh, they're really pretty." and i'm out to noone but my mom (completely on accident; i think she really remembers i told her), so you can imagine how that goes over. people get worried, get disgusted, then get upset i don't think they're dating material when moments before they were disgusted. it's entertaining, actually. i'm not saying i know what you're going through, but i probably have a sense of what you're going through.

and you can't stop being bisexual- it's impossible to change someone's sexuality. sexuality is fluid and can change over time, but as of right now you really can't be anything but bisexual. sorry if this sounds harsh at all, i'm not trying to make it be harsh.
 

[13ULL3TZ]

Being a Bisexual person isnt bad at all. Before I realized i was gay i was bi. I was super confused with it all. Did my friends like me being bi? No they didnt. When i officaily told them i only liked girls and nothing could change me being les/gay. some realised tht they cant change who i like.

You cant let friends change you. You are who u are. If your friends dont like you they arent true. Because friends should stick with you no matter if your bi, gay, trans anything. All that should matter is that your there friend and that your all having fun.,

Coming out to some my friends changed them. They look at me odd or say things to hurt me. But you have to realize that they cant change you if they say anything rude or mean to u. Even if there like eww your dating a girl. dont let it hurt you.
I have been there.  

[emiri-chou]

being Bi is perfectly okay (I went through stages, lesbian, straight, now Bi) if people have issues, tell em to get ********, its not you with the problems, its them, screw em, be you!  

[M i n i R e d S t a r s]

Of god no. There is no problem at all with being bi!!

If people are judging you because of your sexuality, then you can just forget about those bastards.

If people are going to shut you out purely because of your sexuality, then they can shove it into places were the sun doesn't shine. Chin up butter cup. You dont need their crap.

emotion_bigheart