Unsure about plot - opinions please!

[AllisaNero]

So I'm trying to write a story about a 24 year old girl with repressed memories of abuse.
The effects of the repressed memories hinder a normal, happy lifestyle. She has a full-time job after completing an undergraduate degree but it's her social relationships that she struggles with. She's got no boyfriend or partner, has no contact with her family and has two or three close friends with a few more from work. She probably spend most of her time with her horse as she communicates with animals better than with people (it'll be at these points that I'll draw her own feelings out as it'll be in 3rd person).
Essentially, she's going to try and dig up her repressed memories so that she can confront them and move on.

Good idea? Too sad? Boring?
I'd love your opinions.  

[Gnomes-san]

ooh, that'll be tough. It could very well come off as lifetime style shlock, or wind up with Ishiguro style poignancy and be utterly amazing. It'll be a challenge, but what's writing without a little adversity? The idea is excellent, though, and I would love to see how this would turn out.  

[AllisaNero]

Thanks for your input!
I want to steer very clear of the modern-day, chick-lit, pathetic anti-heroine style. But she is going to go through a struggle, a very personal struggle.
Also, when it comes to confronting her abuse, it's going to be less about what actually happened and more how it made her feel. So hopefully, it won't be particularly triggering for abuse sufferers, nor too graphic for younger readers.  

[Maelthra Ssinss]

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.  

[AllisaNero]

Maelthra Ssinss

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.

Good point smile , what I'm going for is that she has goals (undefined atm) and she feels she needs to confront her memories in order to achieve her goals and live the way she wants to.
Sort of like, she wants to understand where she's been so she can have a better idea of where she's going?
What do you think?  

[Maelthra Ssinss]

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.

Good point smile , what I'm going for is that she has goals (undefined atm) and she feels she needs to confront her memories in order to achieve her goals and live the way she wants to.
Sort of like, she wants to understand where she's been so she can have a better idea of where she's going?
What do you think?

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.  

[AllisaNero]

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.

Good point smile , what I'm going for is that she has goals (undefined atm) and she feels she needs to confront her memories in order to achieve her goals and live the way she wants to.
Sort of like, she wants to understand where she's been so she can have a better idea of where she's going?
What do you think?

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.

Often, those who've experienced stress caused by past experiences are actually pushed, by professionals, to find the source of the issue and confront it. Otherwise it's simply a question of treating the symptoms, which doesn't work.
The memories are an obstruction because she can't function as she wants to without understanding her past experiences. Hope that makes more sense.  

[Maelthra Ssinss]

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.

Good point smile , what I'm going for is that she has goals (undefined atm) and she feels she needs to confront her memories in order to achieve her goals and live the way she wants to.
Sort of like, she wants to understand where she's been so she can have a better idea of where she's going?
What do you think?

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.

Often, those who've experienced stress caused by past experiences are actually pushed, by professionals, to find the source of the issue and confront it. Otherwise it's simply a question of treating the symptoms, which doesn't work.
The memories are an obstruction because she can't function as she wants to without understanding her past experiences. Hope that makes more sense.

I understand what you mean.

But you just contradicted yourself.

You say you want her to pull these memories out of the past on her own.

I still say that's not very realistic.

You said so yourself that PROFESSIONAL'S make them find the issue and confront it.

To be realistic, an outside force has to trigger the memories. Otherwise, there's no conflict and it's too Deus Ex Machima.  

[AllisaNero]

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.

Good point smile , what I'm going for is that she has goals (undefined atm) and she feels she needs to confront her memories in order to achieve her goals and live the way she wants to.
Sort of like, she wants to understand where she's been so she can have a better idea of where she's going?
What do you think?

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.

Often, those who've experienced stress caused by past experiences are actually pushed, by professionals, to find the source of the issue and confront it. Otherwise it's simply a question of treating the symptoms, which doesn't work.
The memories are an obstruction because she can't function as she wants to without understanding her past experiences. Hope that makes more sense.

I understand what you mean.

But you just contradicted yourself.

You say you want her to pull these memories out of the past on her own.

I still say that's not very realistic.

You said so yourself that PROFESSIONAL'S make them find the issue and confront it.

To be realistic, an outside force has to trigger the memories. Otherwise, there's no conflict and it's too Deus Ex Machima.

There's absolutely no reason that she wouldn't attend to this off of her on steam. Yes, a professional would require her to confront it but I was using that example to explain the stance of professionals.
Furthermore, the professionals can't make anyone do anything, they simply point them in the right direction, the individual is required to do all the work.
It's like controversial problem solving.
This character has identified a problem and spent her life attempting to solve it, with no success. During the course of the novel, she will isolate a problem solving method that will allow her to solve her problem.
It's very realistic, every human being does this everyday.  

[Maelthra Ssinss]

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I have a thought.

You say she will dig up her memories.

While not having had such an experience myself, I can tell you that no one would WILLING remember repressed memories.

However, what if something that happens, or someone she meets triggers those memories? They'd have to be dealt with, then.

Anyway, just my thoughts.

Good point smile , what I'm going for is that she has goals (undefined atm) and she feels she needs to confront her memories in order to achieve her goals and live the way she wants to.
Sort of like, she wants to understand where she's been so she can have a better idea of where she's going?
What do you think?

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.

Often, those who've experienced stress caused by past experiences are actually pushed, by professionals, to find the source of the issue and confront it. Otherwise it's simply a question of treating the symptoms, which doesn't work.
The memories are an obstruction because she can't function as she wants to without understanding her past experiences. Hope that makes more sense.

I understand what you mean.

But you just contradicted yourself.

You say you want her to pull these memories out of the past on her own.

I still say that's not very realistic.

You said so yourself that PROFESSIONAL'S make them find the issue and confront it.

To be realistic, an outside force has to trigger the memories. Otherwise, there's no conflict and it's too Deus Ex Machima.

There's absolutely no reason that she wouldn't attend to this off of her on steam. Yes, a professional would require her to confront it but I was using that example to explain the stance of professionals.
Furthermore, the professionals can't make anyone do anything, they simply point them in the right direction, the individual is required to do all the work.
It's like controversial problem solving.
This character has identified a problem and spent her life attempting to solve it, with no success. During the course of the novel, she will isolate a problem solving method that will allow her to solve her problem.
It's very realistic, every human being does this everyday.

I still say it's not very realistic for a character with repressed memories to dig them up on her own. That is not an everyday thing.

But. That's my view, you don't have to like it, you don't even have to take my advice.

I'm just saying, it makes her seem like a very Mary Sue character if she can deal with this all on her own.  

[AllisaNero]

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.

Often, those who've experienced stress caused by past experiences are actually pushed, by professionals, to find the source of the issue and confront it. Otherwise it's simply a question of treating the symptoms, which doesn't work.
The memories are an obstruction because she can't function as she wants to without understanding her past experiences. Hope that makes more sense.

I understand what you mean.

But you just contradicted yourself.

You say you want her to pull these memories out of the past on her own.

I still say that's not very realistic.

You said so yourself that PROFESSIONAL'S make them find the issue and confront it.

To be realistic, an outside force has to trigger the memories. Otherwise, there's no conflict and it's too Deus Ex Machima.

There's absolutely no reason that she wouldn't attend to this off of her on steam. Yes, a professional would require her to confront it but I was using that example to explain the stance of professionals.
Furthermore, the professionals can't make anyone do anything, they simply point them in the right direction, the individual is required to do all the work.
It's like controversial problem solving.
This character has identified a problem and spent her life attempting to solve it, with no success. During the course of the novel, she will isolate a problem solving method that will allow her to solve her problem.
It's very realistic, every human being does this everyday.

I still say it's not very realistic for a character with repressed memories to dig them up on her own. That is not an everyday thing.

But. That's my view, you don't have to like it, you don't even have to take my advice.

I'm just saying, it makes her seem like a very Mary Sue character if she can deal with this all on her own.

Perhaps, instead of repressed, I should refer to them as hidden. From my understanding of psychology, the situation I've outlined is entirely plausible.
Repressed memories are not a mental disorder. They are simply memories that a person does not have access too, somewhat similar to childhood amnesia. The only difference is that repressed memories are more likely to occur after the offset of childhood amnesia.
Also, I've yet to describe the abuse she experiences, the levels of which would have considerable baring on how well she would handle this. It's likely that it would not be severe abuse.
I may not be explaining this all as well as I could but I assure you that what I've described is entirely realistic and, therefore, not mary sue material.  

[Maelthra Ssinss]

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

AllisaNero

Maelthra Ssinss

I still don't think that's very realistic.

Most people who've been traumatized will want to put it behind them and forget.

My suggestion would be put the memories as an obstruction to her goal.

Like if she wants a relationship, or someone is trying to pursue a relationship with her, those memories will be a barrier she needs to get past in order to HAVE a relationship.

Often, those who've experienced stress caused by past experiences are actually pushed, by professionals, to find the source of the issue and confront it. Otherwise it's simply a question of treating the symptoms, which doesn't work.
The memories are an obstruction because she can't function as she wants to without understanding her past experiences. Hope that makes more sense.

I understand what you mean.

But you just contradicted yourself.

You say you want her to pull these memories out of the past on her own.

I still say that's not very realistic.

You said so yourself that PROFESSIONAL'S make them find the issue and confront it.

To be realistic, an outside force has to trigger the memories. Otherwise, there's no conflict and it's too Deus Ex Machima.

There's absolutely no reason that she wouldn't attend to this off of her on steam. Yes, a professional would require her to confront it but I was using that example to explain the stance of professionals.
Furthermore, the professionals can't make anyone do anything, they simply point them in the right direction, the individual is required to do all the work.
It's like controversial problem solving.
This character has identified a problem and spent her life attempting to solve it, with no success. During the course of the novel, she will isolate a problem solving method that will allow her to solve her problem.
It's very realistic, every human being does this everyday.

I still say it's not very realistic for a character with repressed memories to dig them up on her own. That is not an everyday thing.

But. That's my view, you don't have to like it, you don't even have to take my advice.

I'm just saying, it makes her seem like a very Mary Sue character if she can deal with this all on her own.

Perhaps, instead of repressed, I should refer to them as hidden. From my understanding of psychology, the situation I've outlined is entirely plausible.
Repressed memories are not a mental disorder. They are simply memories that a person does not have access too, somewhat similar to childhood amnesia. The only difference is that repressed memories are more likely to occur after the offset of childhood amnesia.
Also, I've yet to describe the abuse she experiences, the levels of which would have considerable baring on how well she would handle this. It's likely that it would not be severe abuse.
I may not be explaining this all as well as I could but I assure you that what I've described is entirely realistic and, therefore, not mary sue material.

I'm just saying. I don't view it as very realistic. If she has repressed her memories, or hidden them, how does she even know they exist?

And if she knows what they are about why would she want to dredge them up again?  

[AllisaNero]

Maelthra Ssinss

I'm just saying. I don't view it as very realistic. If she has repressed her memories, or hidden them, how does she even know they exist?

And if she knows what they are about why would she want to dredge them up again?

Repressed memories aren't black and white. It's entirely possible that her unconscious would reveal aspects of these memories as she became older and would have less of a need for the coping mechanism of repressed memories.
Her problem is that she doesn't know what they're about, only that something happened to her family that was uncomfortable for her.
In order to move beyond the negative effects of her past experiences she decides to confront them by going home and speaking to her family