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Tags: writing, literature, fantasy, horror, roleplay 

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ReaperoftheFUNK

Greedy Grabber

PostPosted: Sat Apr 21, 2012 10:22 pm
The surronding area was pitch black, and completely silent. No sounds could be aquired by even the sensitive of ears. I was so frightened that it seemed that hours would go by when I held my breath in fear. I couldn't stop now, not when I have come this far. Then all of a sudden, I sensed something. I felt like all the happiness in the world had been sucked out of my soul very rapidly and violently. Yet, within a few moments it felt like it was forced back as if nothing had ever happened. I knew that there was only one thing that could cause this, and it was here, I could sense it in my gut. I stopped for a moment before continuing, for I knew I had to gather a sense of reality. I was in a maze. This maze wasn't the type of mazes anyone was used to. The plantation around it was dead, and the air was very thickened. "No one should ever live here, this is a living hell." My thoughts were the only thing keeping me sane right now, so I needed to think more. I thought about why I was doing this, for me? No, I would never be that selfish. I had done this for my friends, my family, and above all else, the future of others. Humanity deserved punishment for having suck a vile nature, but not this harsh. All of the sudden, I heard movement around a dead bush. I knew there was no possible way of resting now. In this maze, it was either taking action rapidly or forfeiting. The others had told me though, the only way out is death. The bush shook, and I flinched. The distance between us wasn't that far, hesistation filled my head. I couldn't move toward it, going forward would be difficult because my mind wasn't prepared. It shook again, this time, more violently. I needed to overcome this fear will willpower, but doubts were flowing through my head like a river.

Sorry guys thats it! sweatdrop
Tell me what you think, and what I can improve on!  
PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2012 12:28 pm
Seems like a good start; keeps me reading because I want to know what happened and why the main character is so scared. I would definitely read more if you continued it. smile  

Asdis_Svana

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epical awesome

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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2012 5:19 pm
Good start, maybe read it over after because there's a couple of spelling mistakes and some repeats in there but overall it was epic!  
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Horror

 
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