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Imperfect

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AmiraUnhuman_MEM

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 2:27 pm
I vow to be imperfect,
to turn my back on the world,
to do and say things that I can't take back,
and screw up so many times I stop counting.

But I'll also promise you this,
that when it comes to it I will fight for you,
and defend you even when you're wrong.
I'll hug you to keep you from falling apart
and I'll be a light in the dark.

Because I know you're just like me,
a human being who has flaws.

But I love you despite all of them,
because you love me despite them too.


I just randomly woke up one morning and had to write this down. Talk about random inspiration. sweatdrop I think its cause i had a dream about my best friends. Well, please comment. thanks! heart  
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 3:53 pm
This is so sweet. The message is very good. The rhythm could be better, but I can't think up any way to improve it as of now. Over all, I really like it!  

EstoPerpetua


Emmerah

PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 4:10 am
I love this, and the fact that the rhythm is off also adds to the effect of loving someone because of and despite their imperfections - in my opinion anyways sweatdrop  
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 2:04 pm
Emmerah
I love this, and the fact that the rhythm is off also adds to the effect of loving someone because of and despite their imperfections - in my opinion anyways sweatdrop

thanks miss emmerah. whee its true that it was not meant to have a rhythm. poetry is all about expressing for me, more than fitting it into a certain beat. and thanks kapow123, i do love it very much. 4laugh  

AmiraUnhuman_MEM

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evolvingwolf

PostPosted: Tue Feb 01, 2011 11:51 am
I actually really like the disjointed feel to this poem. Dreams are the best inspiration! Everyone thinks that poetry should just flow evenly, but, in truth, poetry is like shorthand journalling. I love this poem. It's very deep in it's own way. Good job! 3nodding  
PostPosted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:50 pm
Satsenu
I actually really like the disjointed feel to this poem. Dreams are the best inspiration! Everyone thinks that poetry should just flow evenly, but, in truth, poetry is like shorthand journalling. I love this poem. It's very deep in it's own way. Good job! 3nodding

Thank you. As i said before I did not mean for it to have rhythm. I agree with you that poetry is like journaling. smile For me its raw emotional power. The way i do it is i write it as it comes and once i've gotten it out of my system, thats when i fix it and tweak it. I often find if you try too hard to fix it while you are writing it, you lose the inspiration and the feeling, and it becomes too forced. When i look at my first writings i can feel the concentration i put into making it. >< So thank you again, and I hope to see you in the forums again! smile heart  

AmiraUnhuman_MEM

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evolvingwolf

PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 6:01 pm
I definately agree about losing the inspiration and feeling. The rawer a poem is, the more roughed up and dirty, the better it usually is without all the shining and primping most people do these days.  
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Poetry

 
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