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I was at a wedding the other day for my friend's youth pastor....and he invited the whole youth group, or at least the main group of kids that all hung out on youth nights....but only my friends and a couple of the other guys we knew went. And there were a lot of people that SHOULD have been there, but one in particular-my friend who totally messed his school schedule up two years back over a girl he wanted so bad he should graduate a year earlier to be with....and she turned out to be just as we said she was; a sex-abusing slightly insane girl. And so he took this semester, but is leaving till grad because he doesn't need any more classes to graduate. And he's leaving us. And we used to go through everything together. Because highschool's been kinda rough on all of us--not like, "ooh I hate her because she's likes him"-- a bit more real-world than that. But last year we stopped ahnging out and drifted apart and yeah, I miss him and I think he still WANTS to be friends like we were....but it's not happening because he should be here with us. But at that wedding he should have been there, because I think we all needed one more dance with eachother before he left us till the end of next semester....one more fun night. And idk....I guess I'm kinda dissapointed that he wasn't there, cause I kinda feel like he owed it to everyone.
Haha, on another note.....one of the guys I'm friends with, his little brother (who's around my age) was undeniable hitting on me last night, so we danced and all.....But after I was thinking, "why can't I have a date for grad?" Haa, because even though I've accepted that I'll be single for the night, as the guy I like doesn't like me and none of the guys who I know are interested in me I'd want to go with.....but it's not like the guys don't ask. And it's not like I couldn't be with someone if I didn't want to. Lol, because as non-encouraging as I was going for with him, his hands definatley felt good. And I liked having someone who wanted to dance with me as much as I did with him. Lol, so I've started to wonder if not going with just some guy is such a good thing.....Haha, but then I remember that it's better to have standards and that I'm not going to encourage anything with a guy I'll probably never want to go out with or anything after that night. And so I think I'll just stay single and hang with the friends....lol, these are the things that have been floating around in my mind all day.....plus some other stuff, but that doesn't matter!!!! biggrin