I feel like I've lost my way

[Jiylian]

I think this is the first time I've posted in the forums here and I'm rather sad about that... I would've really benefited from some advice already. Well, now I hope to glean some guidance from you all.

I feel like I've fallen off the horse.
I've been struggling to lose weight for upwards to four or five years now. Firstly, I did weight watchers for about nine months and was pretty successful. I lost around 30 lbs or so.
Then I got tired of it and quit. I stopped eating healthy and exercising and I ended up gaining back about 15 lbs.
After my weight gain I tried losing it on my own with my boyfriend's help by trying to eat well and going to the gym about every day.
That didn't last and my results were sluggish.
I stopped caring again. Then I hit the wall, got fed up with myself, and joined weight watchers again. The second time around, my progress was pitiful. Bouncing between 13 and 15 lbs lost in a period of 6 to 8 months. I quit again.
Since then till now I've stopped caring. Yet again.
I've been eating all the wrong things and haven't really been exercising. I don't know what I weight right now, I don't even own a scale.
Basically, I feel like I've lost the power to lose weight. My struggle with food is exhausting and the food is winning.

I need advice on how to become motivated and grow some strong self control and discipline because I'm severely lacking those things.

My stats: 5'6" tall
Last I knew my weight was between 170 and 175lbs.
My goal: 145lbs
Just for kicks, my heaviest ever: 230lbs ish
My lowest: 163-165lbs  

[Lady Kayura]

I can't give you the magic answer since I too struggle with exercising on a regular basis and eating well. I'll do well for a day or even a few then binge on something so horrible it really counteracts everything good I've done.

But I know that when I see the number on the scale, I try to do better. Whether the number is something I don't like or lower than I expected.

So my first bit of advise to you is to get a scale asap. And recording it so you can look back at it is a good idea. I weigh myself very day and that does help to some extent.

If I learn the secret to self control, I'll let you know. I hope you can get motivated again. I do find that the more I frequent this guild, the more motivated I tend to be.

Keeping a daily journal here may help too!  

[Jiylian]

Lady Kayura

I can't give you the magic answer since I too struggle with exercising on a regular basis and eating well. I'll do well for a day or even a few then binge on something so horrible it really counteracts everything good I've done.

But I know that when I see the number on the scale, I try to do better. Whether the number is something I don't like or lower than I expected.

So my first bit of advise to you is to get a scale asap. And recording it so you can look back at it is a good idea. I weigh myself very day and that does help to some extent.

If I learn the secret to self control, I'll let you know. I hope you can get motivated again. I do find that the more I frequent this guild, the more motivated I tend to be.

Keeping a daily journal here may help too!

Well, I'm glad I'm not the only one that struggles!
But yes, I should really get a scale but I'm afraid of becoming obsessed.
Self control is my enemy and has been forever. I guess I just have to practice telling myself no.
By the way, I know about binging. I'm a terrible binger at times. I'm also a binger that post-binge becomes so guilty it puts me in a bad mood for hours. It's terrible and unhealthy. Ugh.
Well, I think I'm certainly going to be a frequenter of this guild now, which is what I should've done ages ago when I joined.  

[Tandahda]

You don't need a scale, it won't help you with motivation. But it might get you obsessed. Its a bad combination. Journaling doesn't really help me all that much either...

I'm about exactly from where you are. My heaviest weight is around 230, and I'm sitting here struggling at about 170ish too.

Exercise is exercise, its tough to work it into your day plans so that it becomes a scheduled event.

The only things that have ever helped me are exercise and just making my potions smaller consistently and slowly, every time I get a whole bunch of motivation and a whole bunch of energy to make huge changes and huge commitments I eventually flag, and then gain weight back.  

[Euthanasia Phase]

Not surprisingly, you're getting conflicting answers. Different methods work for different people - it might be a good idea to try out a few different methods to see what works.
Now for a biased opinion - I tend to quantify as many things as possible. Points counting, weighing myself every day, counting grams of fat, etc. provides a sense of relief in that I know for sure what I'm doing works. Also, there's a certain amount of safety in weighing oneself every day - usually the scale won't show a drastic change. For me, the scale is a healthy motivation. There have been days where cheating sounds extremely tempting, then I get on the scale and see a small loss, which brings my mind back to my goals.
The lack of motivation is understandable. At your highest weight, things are looking pretty bleak - you're thinking about where your body and health will end up if you continue doing what you're doing. If you're 60 pounds below your highest (and congrats for losing it!), it's easy to not make a big deal out of five pounds because your weight is still nowhere as bad as it once was. What I do is use a really unflattering picture at my highest weight to remind myself what will happen if I slack off for too long.  

[Munkers]

C r i p t i k a

But yes, I should really get a scale but I'm afraid of becoming obsessed.

I have the same fear, honestly. Because of that, I only weigh-in once a week. If I know I'm carrying around some water weight (my period makes me retain water), I might do a second weigh-in the next day, but that's it.

I broke that rule recently and went about a week where I was weighing myself every day. For some reason (I'm blaming water weight) my weight really dropped early in the week and then climbed back up over the course of the week. Even though I was still "ahead of the game" seeing the numbers go up crushed me and killed my motivation. Now I know not to do that again.


You still have the power to lose weight. You did it before and you can do it again. The obstacle now is finding a way to be accountable to yourself. Some people do it with journaling or blogging, some people like meetings (like WW), some have a diet or fitness buddy, etc. The important thing is just to try something and if it doesn't work, try something else. Keep going until you figure it out.

I keep a spreadsheet for tracking my daily WW points and weekly flex points. I set it up to have a spot for what I've already eaten and how many points I have left for the day. Seeing what I've got left encourages me to plan a little over the course of the day. Like, if I have a cookie or other sweet for a snack, I know I'll have to have a smaller dinner and then I can decide whether or not that sweet is worth it.