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So there's a boy in my Japanese 2 class, he's in the same grade as me, and as of this past year we've become really great friends. He used to really keep to himself a lot, but now he comes to me with a lot of his problems. Not that I mind, but I usually don't know what to tell him. This is one of those situations.

There's a girl he's been seeing on and off since the summer before freshman year. They've been together this time for about 3 months, and this is their 3rd time together as a couple. I know that sounds really bad, but I've heard worse with other couples. Anyway, my friend, he's never been in a serious relationship before (a few flings, but nothing ever happened) and he wants to take his current relationship seriously, no more games. His girlfriend however isn't sure if she wants to and he's afraid that she has like committment issues and she's scared because of what happened before between them or something and that it's pushing her away.

Basically what she told him was that he played too many games with her and played around too much, and also that she had been played too many times. He basically feels the same way about her though because she was playing him for another guy the last time they were going out. He doesn't want to say that to her face because he's really afraid that something like that would definately push her away. And every time he tries to talk to her about it she always says she doesn't want to talk, or she changes the subject.

We always ask him if it's really worth it to even go out with her since she seems so unsure of the situation, but he always insists it is. And he says that if she's not ready, he'll wait for her, but he's already been waiting since the 5th grade; almost 6 years now.

They're both immature high school kids, but I honestly want to believe that my friend has changed for the better. I can tell he's matured a lot over the past year. He's really not the same a*****e of a kid that I met freshman year for sure.

I want to give him advice, but I honestly haven't been in a situation like this so I don't know what to tell him. I really just think it's not worth it since she would still rather play games and isn't ready for a serious relationship. Not that I think anything is wrong with casual dating, but if my friend is looking for something serious, then this is clearly just not the girl to be in a relationship with. However, he's my friend and I don't want to hurt him by saying the wrong thing. It's the truth though. So I'm just wondering what I should tell him. Can I tell the truth without making it hurtful? Or do you guys have any other advice? gonk

Generally, I do. But he asked for advice, so what am I supposed to say? I already said, "Sorry, can't really help you there," but he didn't accept that as an answer. Obviously they've made mistakes if they've broken up twice before. How many mistakes are left to be made? gonk Well, I suppose a lot, but still.

Most people around here don't go to college, get married young, and have like... 4243145 kids. I mean, even my friend is the 2nd oldest of 5, and his mom is only in her 30's. She had him when she was like 17. But anyway, back on topic, yeah, you're right. It probably won't be serious, but you never know.