Some Criticism is Appreciated

[Crystalbow]

After a few weeks of thinking, I've come to a solid idea that is working for me based on my pure inspiration of letting my stories grow around my characters, like I read elsewhere in the guild for writing inspiration. In fact, this might become a series, maybe a trilogy, depending on how long it takes me to write it all out and whether the ideas just suddenly come to me and click with me. If it does become a trilogy, I'm calling it the Bloodlust Wars series. My first book is called Vengence.

It really just slaps you in the face in the beginning, so you're all like, "Say what now?" But it becomes easier to understand as you go along, much easier, as things about the characters and backgrounds are quickly revealed. It's mainly about three friends: Mizzy, Sadie, and Derek, often referred to as Pillow because he was given the nickname 2 years before the book starts. They're werewolves, really, each with a different background. Mizzy was created by another werewolf and grew up with a pack, while Sadie was a laboratory experiment and Pillow is from a bloodline of humans that are just born with abilities, the vampire gene being dominant, but it avoided him. Then there's the Committee: a rogue division of the government who is led by Pillow's father who conduct illegal human experiments, often kidnapping regular humans and people who belong to the mythical races for data and samples, and most often test subjects.

The three of them finally start the war that was bound to come with the Committee, and eventually, drag everyone on earth into it. This was a really crappy description of it, anyway. So, can anyone give me any sort of criticism for this before I start posting it?  

[The Original Jbird]

Okay.
I don't read very much werewolf stuff, but is this story line at all normal for this kind of thing? I guess I can see where it has potential, but it seems sort of...far fetched?

But like I said, I'm not in to werewolf fiction as it is. Don't go on my opinion alone.

 

[Nyrihaz]

Werewolves, eh? Nice!

Okay, now to my opinion. I think is a pretty cool concept -farfetched maybe, but when reading fantasy, you get use to that. Remember always, that when dealing when mystical, very used creatures, you have to have a hook, something that fresh out these known-characters to us.

Keep it up, really! I'm sure you can make something very interesting out of these idea of you.  

[Crystalbow]

Yeah...When I think about it, I know I went a bit too far. For now, I'm just going to spit the story onto paper and then go back and work on my ideas. Maybe reduce the playing field a bit, so then it isn't so broad.  

[Crystalbow]

Hmm...I have a newer idea, which is a bit better, at least, I think. It's a half finished idea, so don't be too hard.

Well, I've thought of creating my own modern world, separate from Earth, so it can be a bit more believable. It really has some of the same things, though. Mizzy, Sadie, and Derek are still in it, as they're actually characters that live in my head. In addition, I'm adding two new characters: LeAnne and Nick. They all have their own abilities, of course, like how LeAnne can make others love each other, but is unable to love herself. Anyways, it's really a more complicated society, but everyone is turned against Mystics, the term they gave to people who have special abilities. They finally reach Mizzy and the others, and from there, I'm not entirely sure how it will turn out. Like I said, it's a half finished idea.