so this is a short story I did. I was going to enter it in a contest but decided not to. Some feed back would be great. I dont really get people I dont know critiquing my work.... so have at it!



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It is your destiny. Will you live it? That is what the text said. That is what changed my life forever.
His familiar eyes stared at me. They were piercing, icy blue. They penetrated the surface of my skin straight into my soul. He was Derek. The love of my life, my one true love, the one that got away. He leaned forward to kiss me. As his warm lips pressed against mine… I jolted awake.
I got out of bed unphased by the normal dream I had frequently. I took a cold shower, got dressed and ate some “breakfast” meaning a bagel and some skim milk. I didn’t have work today so I decided I would go shopping. Yesterday had been pay day so I had a bit of extra money that needed to be spent. As I was driving to Ross, I received a text. It was from my best friend Kandi. She was asking what I was doing and such. I chose not to text her back for two reasons. The first was I was driving. The second was I didn’t want her coming with me. I would have to pay for her for everything and would end up with no money for myself. She was such a mooch.
I was almost to the clothing store when another text came in. I didn’t want to check it because I just knew it was Kandi again. Why would I want to check it when I wasn’t even going to answer? Check it I did, though, just in case it wasn’t her and it was important. As I looked at the screen I read unknown number 555-555-5555. This intrigued me and so I opened the text. It is your destiny. Will you live it? Answer yes or no. I was freaked a little. What was my destiny and how did this person know it? I decided that I would go ahead and answer yes. A few seconds after the text sent another came in. I was so excited I accidentally jerked the wheel. Into the opposite lane I went, cars flying by me as I tried to correct myself. A semi was coming at me! s**t I WAS GOING TO DIE! I jerked the wheel back to the right lane. The semi missed by a few millimeters. Horns blared all around me. I waved to the people mouthing I was sorry and I quickly turned my attention back to my small silver cell. I read the text. Don’t text while you are driving stupid. It is dangerous. Go to Ross like you intended and resume texting me there.
Oh my god. How did he know I had wanted to go to Ross? I hadn’t told anyone I was going! Who the ******** was this stalker? I was still curious though. What was my so called destiny? So I kept going to Ross and pulled into the parking lot. After finding a space in the back of the lot I put my little accord in park and pulled out my celly again to text that I was there. Before I could send the text though my phone started vibrating as a text from my mystery stalker came in.
You have a choice now. Are you going to follow your destiny or take the money and run? Was all the text said.
I wondered what he meant. I replied what money?
If you check your bank account right now you will see a slight change in the amount. I ask again are you going to take the money and run or are you going to accept your destiny?
I didn’t know what he meant so I texted to get my bank account balance. It came back within a few seconds. $24,562,829.85. Holy… who was this guy and why did he just give me nearly 25 million dollars? This intrigued me so I texted back.
Who are you?
I am not important at the moment. Your destiny is what is important. Now are you going to accept it or are you going to just take the money?
What is my destiny?
You will find out soon enough… if you make the right choice.
Fine I will. What is my destiny?
Go to the airport. Give them your name. Your passport is waiting there already. They will do the rest. Now go.
I pulled out of my back lot spot and pulled back onto the highway. I drove not knowing which airport to go to. I guess the one closest to me. The Tucson airport was but an hour away.
“Hm maybe I should stop for lunch,” I said hearing my stomach growl. My phone vibrated again. I opened it.
Don’t stop for lunch straight to the Tucson airport. You can eat on the plane.
What the ******** how did he know???
The long drive was boring. Nothing really to see. I pulled into the parking lot not sure of how long I would be staying. I was obviously leaving the country if I needed my passport. I shuddered a little. This man knew everything about me the moment I did it. How did he know? Who was he? What was my so called destiny?
I walked up to the doors. As I did the security guard strode up to me.
“Jennifer RIddly?”
“Um… yes…”
“Come with me.”
I followed him to the doors to the airstrip. He got in a large private jet sitting there. I followed him up the ramp.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“A small unnamed island where you will find your destiny.” He replied like that explained everything. I didn’t know what to think!
The plane took off. I sat in the back waiting. My stomach growled again. I thought the person said that I was going to be able to eat! Just as I said that my phone vibrated. Again I opened it.
Enjoy your meal! I hope it is to your satisfaction.
A table came out of the wall beside me and a waiter brought out a delicious looking and smelling fillet minion. I took a bite and almost melted as the succulent taste filled my mouth. Where had this person been all my life? Millions of dollars, fillet minion, a private jet. This was the life!
The flight lasted a few hours and I decided to take a nap. I was woken by a stewardess when the plane landed. I got up and stretched my platinum blonde hair a mess behind me. The stewardess brought me to be back of the plane where there was a champagne, floor length sleeveless dress was hung on a wall. I put it on without question. I was then ambushed by an army of hairdressers and make up specialists. When they were done I looked in the mirror. I was beautiful. My hair flowed like a waterfall down my back, my forest green eyes shown like emeralds.
“Are you ready to meet your destiny?” The stewardess asked.
I hesitated. “Yes…” I said. This was… a fantasy, a fairy tale. Here I was dressed like a princess, about ready to meet my “destiny” and I didn’t even know what it was.
They led me off the plane and I saw a castle, A LITERAL CASTLE! THIS WAS A FAIRY TALE!
My phone vibrated again.
You look beautiful. Are you ready to meet me?
Yes.
Turn around.
I turned and saw him. Suddenly I was dreaming again. The familiar combination of the blue eyes and brown hair looked at me. There was one difference. Instead of a tee shirt and cut offs he was in a black tuxedo. I was happy, but confused again.
The man smiled. “Jenny I missed you. I never got the chance to tell you I loved you before I left. But now I do. And Tell I will! I love you Jennifer RIddly.”
“Derek?”
“Yes.”
“Derek? Is that really you?”
“Yes it is.”
“How did you know?”
“You made it a little obvious.”
“And you returned my feelings?”
“I still do… if you have them for me.”
I didn’t wait, I couldn’t any longer. I ran to my girlhood sweetheart and kissed him powerfully on the lips.
“And now everything is okay.” Derek said simply, kissing me ever so gently.